Would you rather have a 'worse holiday' than usual/than you'd like, or no holiday at all?

[Guibhyl]

I don't think I'm THAT fussy when it comes to holidays. We've two (soon to be three) young kids and I want them to be able to have fun experiences like holidays.

However, now we are tied to the school holidays as eldest has just started reception. I've started looking at places for next year and I just don't think we can get something I'd be happy with for our budget. I've pushed it as much as I can but I'll be on mat leave. Plus, there's only so much I'd really want to spend on a week-long experience regardless of how much ££ I had. But let's say, for example, that a holiday experience I'd be 'happy' with for a family of 5 seems to cost £4k+, but we can only afford to spend up to £3k. Would you just go on a £3k holiday instead for the benefit of the kids, and accept that it's not going to be quite what you want it to be? Or would you save the money and not bother, maybe spending some of it on other experiences during the summer holidays that you would otherwise not be able to afford e.g. peppa pig world?

I accept this is a very first world privileged problem to have. And maybe I'm over thinking it and should just book the best holiday I can find for our budget and make the most of it. But £3k is a lot of money, about two months' wages for me, and i just dread the thought of spending that much on a week away and then it turning out to be a bit shite. WWYD? I can post my list of 'wants' if that would be helpful, although I'm not sure it would be!

I'd consider £3k or £4k on a holiday like that a total waste of money, my holidays are way more fun for me and cost much less.

But everyone chooses what to do with their own money - what do YOU feel is the right way to go?

We go away in October half term instead of the summer, as it saves a bit that way.

I wouldn't book a worse holiday as I know I wouldn't enjoy it so it would be a waste of money. If we can't/won't pay for the holiday we would like we stay in the UK and go abroad the following year. This gives me something to look forward to plus we enjoy our UK holidays too, its just you have to be prepared for the weather not to be great. I am also not against missing the odd couple of days at school to save some money.

When DC were small we always had compromise holidays and they were always brilliant.

Ways to cut costs:

Look where easyjet and ryanair fly to and pick your favourite destination from that. or check for Eurostar deals.

Then book an early morning outbound and late afternoon return flight with a six day holiday instead of a full week. You can get great deals on six-day breaks as they are harder to fill. But you still get a 7 day holiday due to travel days both being long half days free.

Self cater. It's so much easier with small children anyway. You eat and snack when you want, and they get food that is familiar to them when everything else is unfamiliar.

Don't rule out cheap accommodation in nice places. And don't be a snob. One of the best holidays I ever had with DC was staying in a Park Resorts apartment at Romney Sands. Cost about £70 for all three of us for four nights, with free indoor swimming pool, great play park outside our door, beach on the doorstep, a mini steam train running through the park, WW1 spy radars to explore on the lake. The steam train took us to a fun fair and pony rides at one end and a lighthouse and Derek Jarman's garden at the other end, with 1950s ice cream parlours in both places. It was like a fairytale holiday for peanuts.

For fancier holidays, plan well in advance. We got return flights to the far east for £350-400 each by booking a year in advance. If we'd waited until nearer the time, they went up to £1400-2000 each.

If your oldest is only in reception I wouldn’t stick to term times. My oldest has just started high school, it’s only now we will limit ourselves, but during primary school I had no problem taking my DDs out for term time holidays, not that we had many.

We took all 3 out for a week in June and had the best time at a holiday park, lots of activities, no school fine as they missed 9 sessions (4.5 days), I was honest with the school were were going on holiday. We also did the same number of days holiday in the last week of august and it was 4 times the cost of the June holiday so we couldn’t afford extra activities.

The only thing I ever did was make sure that any holidays I booked didn’t clash with school events.

If your not comfortable missing school, check your school calendar for inset days, our school broke up for the summer holidays 3 days before most other schools, I looked at us going overseas and it was up to £2k cheaper on some holidays to fly on the day they broke up and day after than it was 2 days later.

As for Peppa Pig world, when my youngest was desperate to go my DH took her as a Daddy/Daughter treat, was far better just the 2 of them going than paying for 5 of us. My older 2 had done lots of theme parks so were happy not going.

I would do one of two things. Either go every other year, with the year you don't go having a couple of weekends away, short breaks that sort of thing. I was also travel at Easter or October. We never holiday in the summer holidays it's too expensive, lots of places become too hot and too busy. Dd is 12 and we had our first august holiday this year.

Hmmm well I - and almost everybody I know - have never been on a holiday that met your criteria post-kids or even pre-kids! What you want comes with a pretty high price tag in the school holidays. Re UK holidays being just as expensive as going abroad, this just isn't true, I can always find somewhere with three beds sub-£1k for a week in a gorgeous part of the country in the Easter/summer holidays. But each to their own, and if you wouldn't enjoy that sort of holiday then there's obviously no point in going on one!

I would have a look at Facebook groups for some of the hotels you’re discounting. I’ve found them great for tempering the trip advisor reviews. We recently stayed in Lanzarote and I was dreading it based on the recent trip advisor reviews but the Facebook group was a lot more positive and we had a great time.

I’d also look at booking flight separately to accommodation-we saved around £1k on a Jet2 holiday by booking seperately, yes we have a couple less bags (but wouldn’t take 4 for 2 adults and 2 young kids!) and the transfers to pay for but it’s definitely less than £1k!

We’ll be in the same situation next year so following with interest-for what it’s worth I’d rather have a week in the sun in a not perfect hotel (you’ll have the outside space for evening if the weather is good) than not go at all but I appreciate that’s a very privileged position to be in!

We alternate between cheap and more expensive holidays.... including UK camping/caravan park holidays.

Look at may or October half term for cooler destinations

Mine are older now but I found going at the end of the summer hols a bit cheaper .... end of August/early Sept.

As regards review of food etc, see if someone on here can recommend a hotel for that age group. We've been to places that have had some bad reviews and have turned out great. People do love to moan, rather than praise.

We alternate. A couple of years of budget holidays, then a more expensive holiday. Budget: camping, staying at youth hostels or small self-caterings. More expensive: abroad or staying at more luxurious self-caterings.

Our dc have enjoyed all. They do not discriminate between a tent and an hotel - both are different and fun.

@tartandress I don't think the list is particularly unusual or high-spec? Somewhere warm but not baking, AI with edible food, a pool, a beach nearby, and not sharing a room with kids? Every single holiday we went on pre-kids ticked all those boxes are were always less than £1k per person. The difference is probably the school holidays. I can get lots of holidays I'd be perfectly happy with for £2-3k total if I go before July or after August but during the holidays they increase to £4k+ which we can't afford. Going a day or two before the end of term doesn't seem to be helping, potentially because DDs school seems to break up quite late this year. We can't go during May/Oct half terms because of DH's job (the college where he works doesn't have half terms) but we could go early July onwards, if he agrees to her missing a whole week of school. I wouldn't want DD to miss the first day back or the beginning of school year.

I’d go in holiday every year as you only get so many holidays with your children! But I’d alternate cheaper UK holiday with going abroad the next year. And so on

Why not do something considerably cheaper like a eurocamp (or canvas holidays etc) in mid-Europe somewhere and then with the rest of your budget commit to eating out/making life easy for yourselves?

We have 3 kids of school age and similar requirements to you, and I can't remember the last time we spent less than £5k on a week away. Flights plus large enough accommodation for us all really bump up the prices and limit your options in terms of places to stay. My suggestion above is the only other way I'm prepared to go away; it's not a holiday if I still have to think about everyone's eating requirements.

If it's about fun experiences for the kids you'd go camping in UK or take them to Pontins...

We had very basic holidays in UK until DC were teens, very fond memories held by all. Ds1 has started taking his GF to one of our spots.

I don't "need" a holiday and splashing out is nice when you can but I wouldn't turn down any break away just because it didn't meet certain standards.

I'm on my own now and the holiday budget depends on who I'm going with. Some of the cheapest have been the best.

To answer you question, with young DC I'd rather have reasonably comfortable SC accomodation in UK than have us all in a one room apartment in Spain or similar.

I'd probably save the money for a holiday I really wanted to do the following year (but maybe siphon off a small chunk for a weekend away or some day trips)

@Guibhyl Your list isn't unreasonable, but as you are discovering, an annual holiday like that in the school holidays is really expensive and out of reach for most. All my friends and acquaintances are in decent professional jobs, and I don't know anyone who can afford a holiday like that in school hols.

No you take your coats and crack on. The holiday experience is different but no less enjoyable. One of our fondest family memories is coming across a deserted adventure playground on a rainy walk and having it to ourselves meaning adults could have the run of it too. Waterproof trousers meant we had a fun day outdoors and could sit on anything.

Self-catering would probably make a big difference cost wise too... but honestly I find it such a slog. I think it's actually the main thing that makes it feel like a week 'off' for us. I didn't care before kids, I'd be happy with B&B and then wander to find nice restaurants for lunch or dinner or get some nice cheese and bread to have at the apartment. But we did SC this year and the fact I had spent so much money to still make pesto fucking pasta and load a dishwasher and schlep round the supermarket made it a lot less relaxing.

I have tried looking at full board instead of AI because we're not that fussed about the drink and will just get a bottle of wine from the local shop if we want a drink in the evening. But not many places seem to offer it, it's either SC or AI.

Go for fewer days to a nice place
Jet2 for example book 5 days at a nice 4 star location

Would you not consider an apartment where you could do minimal self catering? Cereal for breakfast, rolls for lunch and eat out? As a teacher we always had to go in the school holidays and that’s what we did.

In ‘poor’ years we camped and did house swops. I know it’s not a pre kids sort of holiday but it’s a new reality. Going with another family can really help.

You don't need to actually self cater though. It means you can buy bread and milk, fruit etc to have an easy breakfast and lunch, then eat out, have takeaways or very easy dinners most evenings. Self catering just means you have better facilities. I wouldn't dream of trying to feed everyone what they're used to at home, just as AI wouldn't.

AI will be pushing up the cost a lot. If you looked at HB then you'd just need to source lunch.

@Icefoot But I live in a part of the UK where there's lots of things to do with kids already. We have NT places, museums, parks, farms, etc. Loads of places you could go on a rainy day and put your wellies on and crack on, and this is what we do the other 51 weekends of the year!

My kids are too young to do some of the things I'd like to do in other parts of the UK (e.g. climb Snowdon) so for us, going to a beach is an important part of being on holiday. If it rains all day every day then the beach is going to have limited appeal even for young kids. You can't keep dry, they don't want to swim in the Atlantic when it's 17 degrees and raining, it gets cold. They might build a sandcastle in the rain or something and mess about on the beach for an hour. But we have weeks in the school holidays where it rains literally every day and I just don't know I could justify spending £1k on a holiday cottage plus petrol plus food plus money on activities and outings. We could have days out in the rain at home and not have the extra expense of the accommodation and travel.

I totally agree - for me staying in the UK and cooking is not a holiday. It is a change of scenery but not a holiday IMO. Someone once said if you can see a Tesco, it is not a holiday and I tend to agree. Self catering in the UK to me is just same chores, different location.

I don't do AI as don't do beach breaks and prefer Disney World or NYC/Paris etc. We just eat out for every meal. No real advise other than to say that £3k in the school hols is not that much for that many people unfortunately.