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Original poster

DS diagnosed with ADHD today but can’t take meds. What can we do to help him?

53 replies

Youaresowelcome · 31/10/2023 19:57

As above, DS (7) diagnosed today, but due to various contraindications of the medications, the risks of taking them would far outweigh the benefit, so we have decided against them.

I would be really interested and grateful hear from people in a similar situation with children who have adhd but are not medicating, what can you do to help a child in other ways?

The doctor just signed off with “keep doing what you’re doing”, but what we’re doing is winging it! Obviously I want to make sure we are doing all we can.

He particularly struggles with attention, focus and memory.

Any advice, tips or tricks gratefully recieved.

OP posts:
GFBurger · 31/10/2023 21:38

I can see that the science isn’t supposed to back up the caffeine benefits.

However, we have found tremendous benefits from a morning cup of tea and even Lipton flavoured iced tea in a bottle while out and about. Not so sure it’s the caffeine… the tea just provides a level of focus that wasn’t achievable before. If the tea isn’t drunk, the focus just isn’t there!

Although we have used an emergency Coke Zero when no tea was available and we were heading to public meltdown. It saved us but it could have been the sit down and the chicken nuggets that came with it tbh!

Also I am not sure if tea is considered a stimulant in your situation.

Apart from the tea we are finding achieving a level blood sugar helpful but that’s more from a behavioural management standpoint.

Floonthewall · 31/10/2023 21:40

Alongside all the usual tricks of exercise, good food and positive behaviour strategies, we found music lessions made a huge difference. Learning drums with an understanding teacher seemed to really improve concentration levels and help ds learn how he learns. It's the most improvement over a few months of anything we've tried other than meds for ds who is now 10.

junbean · 31/10/2023 21:42

I'm in the midst of getting my DD assessed and when I asked about treatment options her Dr said that behavioral therapy is the first option and then meds if needed. i can't be sure it was behavioral therapy- it was some type of therapy though, I'm sure some googling will figure it out. Her first session is later this week. And for the meds there's stimulant and non-stimulant. She said there's lots of options! I wonder if your DC's doctor was really trying? I'm new to this but there's a range of things to try. There's loads of videos on YT about it I've been meaning to watch, from Drs and individuals. I'm sure that's a very enlightening resource as well. Maybe do your research and bring notes to your Dr next time.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

7 year olds General health SEN
Localher0 · 31/10/2023 21:42

@Snowdayplease managed to get some last month but they said there was a problem! Hoping it's sorted in time for new prescription......

CatherinedeBourgh · 31/10/2023 21:44

Things that help mine a lot:

Several bursts of exercise in a day (even short). Short periods of concentration, interspersed with vigorous activity. At 7 the periods of concentration were as little as 10-15 minutes. Over time the periods of concentration can be increased, as teens mine will now do 45mins to an hour.

Meditation really helps one of them. Allowing them to do several things at the same time (doodling, fiddling or snuggling a pet while trying to pay attention) helps too. If they are sitting still and looking attentive, chances are their mind has wandered a million miles away.

Zero procrastination allowed. If they are told to do something, they have to do it right now. Otherwise they will get distracted and forget.

But the main thing is lots and lots of movement. Ideally outside, but if necessary a few push-ups/pull ups/star jumps (or at the age yours is, just running around the table/jumping) between things.

junbean · 31/10/2023 21:45

GFBurger · 31/10/2023 21:38

I can see that the science isn’t supposed to back up the caffeine benefits.

However, we have found tremendous benefits from a morning cup of tea and even Lipton flavoured iced tea in a bottle while out and about. Not so sure it’s the caffeine… the tea just provides a level of focus that wasn’t achievable before. If the tea isn’t drunk, the focus just isn’t there!

Although we have used an emergency Coke Zero when no tea was available and we were heading to public meltdown. It saved us but it could have been the sit down and the chicken nuggets that came with it tbh!

Also I am not sure if tea is considered a stimulant in your situation.

Apart from the tea we are finding achieving a level blood sugar helpful but that’s more from a behavioural management standpoint.

This is interesting, I'll be looking into the caffeine thing. And yes I agree yummy food is a great way to bring some focus! Snacks have always kept my DD happy, and caffeine doesn't affect her like it does me (anxiety).

junbean · 31/10/2023 21:46

Localher0 · 31/10/2023 21:42

@Snowdayplease managed to get some last month but they said there was a problem! Hoping it's sorted in time for new prescription......

I heard there's a shortage! We haven't started on meds yet but are supposed to very soon. When I saw that in the news I was worried.

Greenberg2 · 31/10/2023 21:55

CatherinedeBourgh · 31/10/2023 21:44

Things that help mine a lot:

Several bursts of exercise in a day (even short). Short periods of concentration, interspersed with vigorous activity. At 7 the periods of concentration were as little as 10-15 minutes. Over time the periods of concentration can be increased, as teens mine will now do 45mins to an hour.

Meditation really helps one of them. Allowing them to do several things at the same time (doodling, fiddling or snuggling a pet while trying to pay attention) helps too. If they are sitting still and looking attentive, chances are their mind has wandered a million miles away.

Zero procrastination allowed. If they are told to do something, they have to do it right now. Otherwise they will get distracted and forget.

But the main thing is lots and lots of movement. Ideally outside, but if necessary a few push-ups/pull ups/star jumps (or at the age yours is, just running around the table/jumping) between things.

All these help me, so yes they're great.

Also I have found that I don't instinctively know how to organise myself or plan things the way someone NT would. Learning better strategies at a younger age would have transformed my life. I've had to work them out as an adult which involved lots of trying and failing and disappointing other people.

Not giving a whole list of instructions at once, e.g. go and brush your teeth, get your clothes ready for the morning, get into your pyjamas and wash your face. I would probably just remember the first or the last one.

ChateauMargaux · 31/10/2023 22:01

Maybe read Dr Natasha Campbell McBride
. Gut and the psychology symdrome.

If you have funds, I would consider gene testing (23andme) along with some analysis of the results which can highlight issues with absorbption and detox pathways as well as some supplements that can support these functional elements.

If he is on other medication, look at the vitamins and minerals depleted by these medications and supplement those.

It may be helpful to have a functional medical practitioner involved, ideally someone who can order and interpret tests and provide detailed input on food based diet as ideally, you want to be able to at least some of the correction with diet and not loads more pills... but supplements may be required at the beginning especially if there is medicine induced depletion and gene mutations involved.

Gene mutations are common across the population, don't affect everyone the same way.. and the science is relatively recent so not always conclusive or compelling but you might feel it worth trying.

Snowdayplease · 31/10/2023 23:07

Localher0 · 31/10/2023 21:42

@Snowdayplease managed to get some last month but they said there was a problem! Hoping it's sorted in time for new prescription......

We won't get any more (Scotland) until January at earliest 😩

maw29 · 31/10/2023 23:30

Non stimulant meds could be an option. Is it heart problems he has and that's why he's contraindicated?

scoobydoo1971 · 31/10/2023 23:51

My 15 year old has ADHD. Boxing club has helped with behaviour and attitude a lot.

Localher0 · 01/11/2023 09:39

@Snowdayplease that's awful!! Has your DH just had to do without?? DD just requested a new prescription- she's at Uni now so it'll go to a pharmacy nearby but this doesn't sound good.....

Snowdayplease · 01/11/2023 10:01

@Localher0 we haven't run out yet, and he has a lower dosage that should get him to the start of December. January isn't even confirmed it's just a "not before" date.
If it turns out they are available in England i might need to take a drive down!

MotherEarthisaTerf · 01/11/2023 10:42

Snowdayplease · 01/11/2023 10:01

@Localher0 we haven't run out yet, and he has a lower dosage that should get him to the start of December. January isn't even confirmed it's just a "not before" date.
If it turns out they are available in England i might need to take a drive down!

No better in England. Our local adhd service advised they are expecting difficulties with supply until February 24. It’s an international problem.

Betty000 · 01/11/2023 10:44

Science may not back it but my own life experience does!

Betty000 · 01/11/2023 10:45

ADHD at its finest, my response above was in regards to a pp mentioning caffeine

Tripl3Jump · 01/11/2023 10:55

Science hasn’t debunked caffeine, research is mixed. It definitely helps me and my children. Also a professional supporting us who has adhd swears by it for herself. I don’t think it’s supposed to be as good as medication though.

Wildhorses2244 · 01/11/2023 10:55

My ds has adhd and isn’t yet medicated as I wanted to give him a year to come to terms with diagnosis and understand it himself before considering medication. He is 6 so quite young for medication.

The things which we have found most helpful are lots of exercise in particular in the morning before school; stopping using his tablet on school nights (painful but worth it) and doing martial arts.

He has play therapy which he finds helpful, and we are working through some adhd books at home to help him with understanding.

The comments here about caffeine are interesting and I’m going to try that and see if it makes a difference…..

Phineyj · 01/11/2023 11:01

The Parents’ Guide to ADHD Medicines amzn.eu/d/63R1g66

Have you read this? There are a lot of options, but the NHS won't necessarily tell you.

Nothingbuttheglory · 01/11/2023 11:07

The Incredible Years programme. It's evidence-based and recommended by the WHO. I know some CAMHS services run it, although not all, sadly. There is a book, not quite the same as a group but might be worth a look. Written by Carolyn Webster-Stratton.

UnbeatenMum · 01/11/2023 11:13

I've heard background music can help concentration - might be worth a try if you have to do homework at home, or even for things like getting dressed. Trance was specifically recommended but you could try different options.

Localher0 · 01/11/2023 13:31

@MotherEarthisaTerf February???????? Fuck me - this is a disaster. DS is about to have his assessment and wants medication for his final year at Uni.....

drspouse · 01/11/2023 16:56

By the way we have signed up for ADHD Dude coaching - it's a monthly payment and you can join in a live coaching session every week or so. It's best to start with the webinars and then if you have questions after trying a few of the techniques go on the coaching sessions.

TotalOverhaul · 01/11/2023 17:08

Help organise his schoolwork. I got DS zip bags with different coloured zips for each subejct. Into them went anything he'd need (so maths set for maths one, coloured pencils for geog and separate coloured pencils for art etc so he never had to remember to switch between subjects. I put his timetable and homework timetable on the fridge and colour coded them linked to his ziplock bags, highlighting swimming, PE and games so he always had kit and couldn't forget it.

That meant, at a glance he could see what needed to go into school each day. At night, he had a crate in the kitchen to dump all the files in, then we checked his bag for school letters or forms to sign etc.

Tell teachers and ask that he gets permission to take a photo of any homework put up on the board, as it can be easy to forget to write it down at the end of class with all other distractions, or ask for homework to be assigned via an online hub if that's an option.

Use timers for things like room tidying. Set for no longer than 5 minutes as it is very easy to wander off after 2 minutes and forget what you're supposed to be doing. the timer will remind you and you can reset it for another 5 or if it's really bad, for 2 mins at a time to keep on track.

Encourage use of a phone diary with alarms and reminders.

Feed him fish if he eats it and walnuts and eggs. Give him magnesium and B-complex and D supplements.