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Original poster

Why does he do it

40 replies

Herewegoagain55 · 30/10/2023 18:29

So dd ex beat her up . He went to prison was meant to be for a few months, but he would either break licence conditions or restraining order. He's only ever been out fir a few days up to 10 days at mist then back on prison again. I think he's ended up doing almost 3 years in all .

But what I don't get is why does he keep trying to contact her. Its the same shit , threats /nastiness . Then stuff like I just want to talk so I can move on. Back to threats etc.

Even if he did bump into her accidentally see her or what ever its not to shake her hand is it. As far as he's concerned she put him in prison for almost 3 years . Just worries me that one day he might try and really hurt her.

This is not a thread to ask how she stops him trying to contact her that's all in hand things in place best as it can be etc .

It's more of a what if he did find her one day.
I think maybe I need to step away from the documentary I have been watching one called released to kill.

I just don't get why he does it I mean 3/4 months prison turning into almost 3 years in prison that's just very odd he could have been getting on with his life .

OP posts:
allaloneandlost · 30/10/2023 20:33

Ofc it's a worry and therapeutic for you to post on here. You don't know what this person's going to do next. Hope you're getting any support you can for yourself.

Original poster
Herewegoagain55 · 30/10/2023 20:39

PumpkinPick · 30/10/2023 19:58

The op made it sound like she rarely posts when in fact she posts this monthly. Just clearing it up for someone that asked.

So is this the only reason you came on the thread to tell people I have posted regarding the situation before?

As far as I'm awear there is no rule that says how often I can post about a subject.

OP posts:
Original poster
Herewegoagain55 · 30/10/2023 20:45

allaloneandlost · 30/10/2023 20:33

Ofc it's a worry and therapeutic for you to post on here. You don't know what this person's going to do next. Hope you're getting any support you can for yourself.

Exactly it's just a place to say what I'm thinking. I think when you say things out loud type in this case . It takes the edge of a bit. I don't want to be saying this to my family members.

OP posts:
allaloneandlost · 30/10/2023 20:49

Nothing wrong with that at all. It does you good saying them when you can't say this to family because you have to be the strong person. They're fair and valid :)

Totaly · 30/10/2023 20:50

He might feel addicted to your daughter - looking for another high?

Does it matter? You need to keep her safe, change her name, get her off social media - and yourself for that matter.

Why not move away just to be sure?

Id do anything to remove myself from that type of situation.

Whatwillnye · 30/10/2023 21:01

He sees her as his possession?
He gets a thrill out of abusing people?
He has never had to take responsibility for his actions before?
He's just getting started?
He doesn't know what loving relationship is and will stop at nothing to take control over another Person?
He's emotionally immature?
All of the above?

Theokaycokey · 30/10/2023 21:07

I'm afraid that his behaviour is very worrying indeed, hence why he's still behind bars. I would be asking for police protection for your daughter. Better still, she should move to a new area and lie low if she can. I'm not sure that police have the resources to protect her properly and no contact orders and him being barred from certain areas is not going to deter a man like him. She needs to move and start lying to him or others about where she is.

Original poster
Herewegoagain55 · 30/10/2023 21:19

Whatwillnye · 30/10/2023 21:01

He sees her as his possession?
He gets a thrill out of abusing people?
He has never had to take responsibility for his actions before?
He's just getting started?
He doesn't know what loving relationship is and will stop at nothing to take control over another Person?
He's emotionally immature?
All of the above?

Probably all of the above plus some more . Or maybe he likes prison.

OP posts:
CameleonAreFightingBack · 30/10/2023 21:25

PumpkinPick · 30/10/2023 19:58

The op made it sound like she rarely posts when in fact she posts this monthly. Just clearing it up for someone that asked.

And??

If it bothers you that much, just hide the thread and carry on with your life.
Like anyone else who isn’t keen on this thread.

CameleonAreFightingBack · 30/10/2023 21:28

@Herewegoagain55 would it help if you were having counselling yourself?

Nothing wrong with posting on here.
But I’m wondering if RL support could give even more of tte support you clearly need. It must be so frightening. And I imagine even more so when he will be released (again)

Original poster
Herewegoagain55 · 30/10/2023 21:47

CameleonAreFightingBack · 30/10/2023 21:28

@Herewegoagain55 would it help if you were having counselling yourself?

Nothing wrong with posting on here.
But I’m wondering if RL support could give even more of tte support you clearly need. It must be so frightening. And I imagine even more so when he will be released (again)

It's very hard to get counselling on the NHS. I don't have the means to go private. I'm actually ok . It's just sometimes I need the space to say what I'm thinking out loud . Which is what I do here .

OP posts:
allaloneandlost · 31/10/2023 00:06

Good point yes it is very hard to get NHS help. There are charities that might help like MIND for free or very low cost, as well as being able to vent on here which is very important. You need that to support your DD.

Original poster
Herewegoagain55 · 31/10/2023 19:50

Theokaycokey · 30/10/2023 21:07

I'm afraid that his behaviour is very worrying indeed, hence why he's still behind bars. I would be asking for police protection for your daughter. Better still, she should move to a new area and lie low if she can. I'm not sure that police have the resources to protect her properly and no contact orders and him being barred from certain areas is not going to deter a man like him. She needs to move and start lying to him or others about where she is.

He does not know where she is. Her address has a marker on it just incase . She has extra secure door. Cctv etc.. there's a restraining order. But he's not bared from a certain area as that would indicate where she lives.

OP posts:
itsmylife7 · 31/10/2023 20:56

PumpkinPick · 30/10/2023 19:21

You’ve posted about it this month, and last month.

So what ?

OP can post every day about this terrifying ordeal,if she wants.

Original poster
Herewegoagain55 · 01/11/2023 08:08

itsmylife7 · 31/10/2023 20:56

So what ?

OP can post every day about this terrifying ordeal,if she wants.

Show quote history

I have has simlar on my other thread. Almost boarding trying to stop me from posting few posts deleted etc. Don't grt why they can't just scroll by

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