Sending Christmas cards in the mail

[Bluewaterloo]

I notice every year that my mother sends Christmas cards in the mail. It's usually to her siblings and their parents. She usually gets cards too in the mail.

I get it's a nice tradition but I thought about this. My mother and her family of origin/siblings - they never make time for each other. They don't see each other from one end of the year to the next. Excuses are made when it comes to any meet ups. They only see each other really now at funerals. One funeral was in 2010 and then another 11 years after that. Her siblings are all living in the same country and to be honest there's no excuse for not meeting up.

I mean like, why bother sending Christmas cards like this? I know it's a nice tradition but it's a bit pointless at this stage. Sending cards to and from people that don't make any effort to see each other - it's crazy. How about sending cards to people who are genuinely in your life.

I still send a few cards and I like the chance to update people - eg I've moved this year, ds is doing second year of uni etc. I do it because I like getting that kind of news from others. However, I am doing fewer and fewer as it's a dying tradition and so expensive, it feels like I'm asking people to spend money on stamps that they may not have. And as you say, most of those I used to send cards to are on WhatsApp groups with me.

The final straw really is that hardly anyone writes any news anyway!

I agree. I send just 10 cards a year and only 2 of those I see.

Perhaps those annual cards help maintain the tenuous relationship that does exist.

I can't comment on your mums case, but maybe its so ingrained, she just continues to do it?

I send cards because I have relatives abroad which I can't/don't see often due to the distance. Some are older, and don't have internet access, so an e-card thing wouldn't be an option.

It sounds as though she would lose touch completely without the cards and might not want to do so. I have a few old friends who I have no contact with other than Christmas cards, we haven't seen each other for decades and possibly never will again but I do still like to hear what is happening in their lives. Also some relatives who I might not see for years on end, they don't do SM etc. Whereas people who are in my life regularly there is less need because we see each other and keep in touch through other means.

It's just a thing people do with people they aren't super close to but don't want to sever ties completely. Most of the people I send cards to actually I never see and don't particularly want to see. It's just what we do because we've always done it. If I didn't want to do it, I'd stop. So it's not really a big deal.

I don't think that an email, text message of a social media greeting has the same impact as a card. If I stopped sending cards due to silly stamp prices, I would not bother with the other options.

I find it weirder when people send cards to people they see all the time. I send Christmas cards to loads of people I haven't seen in years, all in the post. Until I met DH I had no idea people exchange them like birthday cards. His parents and siblings all write them to each other and pass them out on Xmas day.

Still seems really weird to me but I sign my name where I'm told to!

I find it weirder when people send cards to people they see all the time.

Me too! If I see you regularly then your Christmas card will be me, in person, wishing you a Happy Christmas. If I am not going to see you on the run up to Christmas, a card it is.