How can I help my quiet 5 year old

[daisychainrose]

Just that really, and am I doing the right things?

My 5 year old DD is in reception class, teacher says she can be very, very quiet. But on the other hand, quietly confident. At home she's of course chatty and loud...
Recently we went to one of her classmates birthday party. She was quiet , took a while to warm up but seemed to enjoy. However, one girl who I will say was vey loud, been a little bossy said to my DD "you're too quiet ...go away I don't want to play with you"
I asked her after the party if this has happened before and she said it has at school.
She said it makes her feel sad.

She has other friends and one boy she's close with.
I reassured her and said that there's nothing wrong with being quiet , some people are quiet and some are loud..

She does sport and swimming and really enjoys , she's never once not wanted to got to school but I worry now I've seen this...

What else can I do or say to support her.

This isn't really about being quiet - as you say, there's nothing wrong with that at all.
I'd be asking if the same girl is like this at school or if it's others too.
Then have a chat with the teacher about this behaviour as it's not ok.

My little one was exactly the same. She will make friends for sure, probably with children who are a
little less bossy and domineering. Which isn’t a bad thing. I would say I usually refer to my little one as reserved as opposed to shy. Sometimes they sort of grow to the label we give them. So I always tried to avoid saying shy. But reserved isn’t a bad thing. I bet she’s a lovely little thing. It is hard when they’re so little, you just want to put them in your pocket and look after them at all times (maybe that’s just me) but reserved and observing I always think is a sign of intelligence and never a bad thing. I hope you’re both okay. ♥️

How about encouraging her to be herself? She sounds like a great kid, quiet but self confident is a great trait to have.

@Doratheexplorer1 thank you. She is so, so lovely. I always make sure that I don't call her shy or explain she's shy...
I was wondering if sport might give her more confidence...
It is very much like she is quietly confident...she's never clinging to me or anything like that....it's just when another mum for example speaks to her she immediately says either nothing or speaks very quietly so as if they can't hear her...

Please make sure she knows that she is fine as she is, quiet or not. I say this because my DD is 16 now and has been told she is quiet her whole life, by teachers etc. As she puts it ‘It’s like they want me to change my personality and I can’t do that.’

I wouldn’t overly worry- she’s just started school, at this point the loudest will stand out but with time friendships form and kids develop their social skills.

I would make it very clear to her that I don't like what that other girl said to her, that is just rude and unkind. Your daughter is ok as she is, your post comes across a little like you don't believe that, but please just try and nurture her for the special little girl she is. I work in a school and there are a wide range of different personalities there, this is what makes it so lovely, not that every child is the same.

My little one did gymnastics from about age 5. My boy played rugby. (He’s 20 now. He still plays) you’re right - Sport definitely gives them a confidence that I feel you can’t find elsewhere. It’s lovely if they can find a sport they love and that way they have a life outside of school and a wider reach of little pals. ♥️