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Original poster

Nervous/anxious when driving all of a sudden

22 replies

redambergreen70 · 24/10/2023 15:34

Im a daily driver which includes motorways. I am also required to travel as part of my job so this can mean driving up to 4/5 hours each way once or twice a month.

I’ve always been a confident driver and it has never bothered me. I can be an anxious passenger and prefer to drive however. Until a month or so ago…

There is nothing that I can pinpoint that has triggered me, no near misses or accidents. However I’ve become so nervous and anxious when driving on the motorway that I’m starting to consider using alternative routes or trains. I only feel ok in the first lane at 50/60. Overtaking, driving in the rain or dark makes me so anxious. I feel impeding doom and that the car is going to lose control.

Has this happens to anyone else or where do I go from here? I’ve never experienced this before and not sure how to get over it.

OP posts:
whizzbangpopsplutter · 24/10/2023 15:53

It doesn't sound as if it's necessarily to do the driving itself, as you say you're an experienced driver and nothing has changed there. Is there anything else that could be going on (non driving related) that might have changed and made you anxious about feeling out of control?

ArcticLingered · 24/10/2023 15:55

@redambergreen70 - have you had your eyes tested recently? I had this slightly - and I attributed it to not being able to see as far into the distance as far as I used to, and that made driving at speed more scary.
It wasn't drastic btw! But I got new glasses and did feel better.

violetcuriosity · 24/10/2023 15:57

There was another thread about this recently- you're not alone! Lots of good advice on there xxx

Newgolddream70 · 24/10/2023 16:00

I'm in the same boat and I've seen the other thread. Mine is definitely menopause related has come out of nowhere. It's really horrible so I sympathise. I avoid the motorway where possible.

ssd · 24/10/2023 16:32

Its menopause. Im guessing op is mid to late 40s.

runwithme · 24/10/2023 16:39

I'm in a similar boat, although I don't drive often. When I do drive, I'm fine, but its the idea of driving. I'm more than happy to take a train journey than drive.

Can anyone link to the other post that a PP mentioned? And is it really linked to menopause? I find I'm going through a lot of psychological symptoms, but no physical symptoms

martha4clark · 24/10/2023 16:42

Yes, this could be a symptom of peri menopause. I know a few people that this has happened to.

Katherineryan · 24/10/2023 16:44

How old are you? Are you peri menopausal or in menopause?

Jeremy Vine covered this on his radio show very recently (BBC Radio 2 12noon) Lots of women, myself included, have had anxiety when driving, when before we were confident drivers.

See if you can find the show

TheCurtainQueen · 24/10/2023 17:04

Menopause. Get yourself some HRT.

Original poster
redambergreen70 · 24/10/2023 17:24

I’m 34 and recently had blood work done for some other issues. GP said my hormones were in order and not peri-menopause.
I have been more stressed than usually lately however which they put those other issues down to.
I honestly have no idea where this has come from. One journey I was fine, the next and ever since I’ve been so anxious to the point where I feel I may have to pull over and call someone to get me.

OP posts:
ssd · 24/10/2023 21:25

Sorry op i was wrong about your age

BeverleyMacker · 24/10/2023 21:40

Menopause related possibly. I've heard a lot about it recently.

ScarlettDarling · 24/10/2023 21:47

I’ve become really scared about night time driving. I’ve never been a really confident driver but I’m a nervous wreck now driving when it’s dark. My night vision has definitely deteriorated so I got driving glasses which have helped but if I have to drive anywhere unfamiliar in the dark, I’m a mess.
No help op I know but you’re not alone.
And I’m 49 so the peri theory could well be true for me.

Mia2468 · 24/10/2023 22:54

I have never been a confident driver (passed at 17), but much worse now. I am through the menopause, so don't feel this is relevant for me. I don't even like being a passenger anymore. I am finding I am not going places as I don't was to be in a car, I am scared. My DH drives on long trips I only drive locally. No problem with trains, planes or coaches just find I feel vulnerable in a car. The roads are too busy, with so many idiots - smart motorways are horrendously dangerous.

Years ago my local council held a day course for qualified drivers lacking confidence. After a morning of theory I was paired with a lady exactly like you. An instructor took us out, taking turns driving with the other person in the back. She mentioned she found merging with traffic stressful. The instructor drew her a plan, talked her through it and although she did complete the task she was almost in tears. Previously she had driven all over the country and had not had an accident, but her confidence had just disappeared

I wish I knew the solution

HerbalTeal · 24/10/2023 23:13

Hi OP, I could have written this - I partly blame mine on covid. I used. To drive all over the country, wouldn’t think anything of driving for 8 hours on the motorway in a day, happy to cruise along in outside lane (overtaking 😇) and it’s like a switch has flipped.

I feel like I’m not grounded, and just need to stop the car. I really struggle with a trapped feeling. I have beta blockers but not tried them yet. I’ve had to exit the motor way at times. I’ve no advice though. I’ve thought about lessons, but I KNOW what to do, I was a v good driver. It’s like my balance / gravity has gone.

hopsalong · 24/10/2023 23:29

Do you have children, OP?

I was a confident (foolhardy?) driver before I had children. As soon as I went back to work after having DC1 I became nervous. I don't think it was so much anxiety about being killed in a car accident as a general sense of the preciousness and fragility of being alive.

Still a nervous (better?) driver ten years on.

RoyalImpatience · 25/10/2023 07:09

Op I'm the same but what got me on the motorway was knowing, no hard shoulder.
Bat definitely increased my worry

MyCircumference · 25/10/2023 07:13

i am the same, since someone had a right go at me, drove to the supermarket to find me!
and i never drive on motor ways but get anxious on dual carriageways and unknown routes

MyCircumference · 25/10/2023 07:16

i hated my last car, used to feel so nervous i wouldnt be able to get out as it was two door

Eyesopenwideawake · 25/10/2023 08:34

I have been more stressed than usually lately

Sometimes the mind will focus on something not directly related to the stress inducing issues if it can't figure out an answer to them. So if you can't do anything about whatever is causing you to feel stressed, the pressure will build up and find an outlet in some random way - in your case a sudden fear of driving.

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