Primary teachers / school staff: have the children you taught long ago turned out to be the adults you thought they would?

[thelongroad]

Apologies for the awkward title, but what I mean is: do you think you can tell what sort of person someone is going to be from quite young?

I've been working in a school for about 6 months and one of the things that has surprised and delighted me is how formed so many characters are already; I think I can absolutely picture the kind of adults that many of them will be. I "recognise" some of them too, iykwim - I can think of teens and adults I know and really see what they must have been like as little kids.
It's been a real pleasure to get to know my class.

It's made me think about what I was like when I was little too, and whether I am the logical adult that grew from that child. I think I am. Most of my main character traits are the same - in fact, I feel in many ways I'm now even more my core personality than I was in my 20s and early 30s.

Anyway, would be really interested in hearing what others think!

I have worked for a very long time in primary schools in the same small inner-city area of a large city, so know many young people and families from decades ago.
I often get a tap on the shoulder when out, and turn around to see an old pupil towering over me with a big grin. Always love to hear how their lives have unfolded.
It's really encouraging as, given the demographic of the areas where I have taught, these are young people who, in the main, have had very little 'handed to them'. They, and their parents, have grafted to access opportunities and education, often the first generation to go on to gain qualifications and trades. I'm honestly never happier than when I see an old pupil who seems 'settled', irrespective of what they are doing: carpentry, an electrician, nursery worker, further studies. They've come through and life is working out.
I rarely see the few who were able to move away to uni, but the ones who are still around are more often the ones I felt I had reason to worry about. Turns out that they often did just fine.

I find this fascinating so I'm giving the thread a little bump in the hope there will be others like EveSix with interesting stories to share!

I've just been binge watching the series called 7 up. It started with the premise of 'give me a child at the age of 7 and I will give you the man'. It filmed them at age 7, 14, 21, and every 7 years. In the last one, they were 63. It was interesting to see if they lived the life you thought they would. If you haven't seen it, you may find it interesting.

There are one or two that have turned out as I feared, so not in a good way.

There’s one boy I was convinced would become an actor or a politician. He’s neither.

I often think of my particular year group from when I was head of year. I hope they’re happy and successful in their own terms.

On the flip side of this. I had a former teacher who was quite nasty to me about this. So when I was in school I was really driven, straight A student etc etc. I’m now 26 and I bumped into my old maths teacher in tesco a few months back with my then month old baby boy. He looked at me and looked at the baby and said ‘oh I thought you’d have some high flying finance job by now, not been married with a baby’ I was stunned and hurt because he said it so patronisingly and nearly in a disappointed way?? I replied ‘Actually Mr. X I’m a fully qualified chartered accountant and I just got promoted there to manager before I went on maternity leave. God love the 21st century when you can be a mummy, a wife AND have a career!’ with a joke with a jag tone and he was mortified!

Primary teacher here of many years. My first school was in a very deprived area, far too much crime and anti-social behaviour in the majority of families.

One little boy I remember fondly was the youngest of four boys, father in prison and his oldest brother was already in a youth offending place. He was the sweetest little guy, so wanted to learn but I was convinced he would follow in his brothers footsteps because he knew no other life. About 18 months ago I had a FB friends request from him - he’d seen me post on the schools memories FB page. He is now in his mid 20s with his own business. I was thrilled for him, he said he was just so determined to be different and he thanked me for being so nice to him. A lot of people when they discovered his surname washed their hands of him.

There are some others less drastic too! Both when they did what I expected and the complete opposite.

Cool thread but also depressing 😂 I imagine I'd be a disappointment to my primary school teachers. Top of the class, off to a selective school, just a SAHM.

It's interesting.

I've only worked as a primary school teacher for 12 years or so but it's been interesting to hear about how some of the kids I taught in my early years are getting on now.

I teach in a very small, nurturing 'leafy lane' school and unfortunately our local high school is very much the opposite and got 'inadequate' on a recent inspection.
So I've seen a few kids who were the 'cheeky' type who liked to 'push it' end up in the wrong crowd and getting into alot of trouble in high school. I've also seen others who struggled academically be pulled out and home schooled.

I've also known a few turn out lovely indeed.

Environmental factors and home life have had alot to answer for. The ones who have had an unsettled childhood are easily pulled into the wrong crowd and make poor choices when older.

An interesting thread. I suspect I'd be a disappointment to my teachers, but I'm happy with my life.

Ive been teaching 16 years and my first bunch are now 27 or so. My baby sister was in the first class I taught (yes, it was weird!!) and she has a lot of them on FB so I sometimes see what they're up to. Some lovely successes, happy families, travelling, careers, etc.
One less happy story is a boy both me and my colleague at the time privately said would end up dead before he was an adult. He was so let down by every adult who was meant to look after him. I remember the actual day he came in to school grinning, with the initials of a well known criminal gang carved into his arm. Social care not interested. He was stabbed and died last year. Gang related.

Some good stories some sad ones.
A few I know of who have exceeded any expectations you could have at 6 - oxbridge graduates, owning own business etc.
Some truly heartbreaking one’s - suicide, prison etc
We love to see how they get on. It’s nearly all positive stories!

I know one boy murdered someone age 16 as his name was on social media before it was taken down and there was only 1 school in the town- so it had to be one of my reception class that year.

Thanks for this recommendation 💐
I had never heard of it. Watched two episodes this morning. Loving it.

I have worked in a primary school for 7 years (not a teacher).
I also love how their personality traits are there from reception. You can see the future adult there for sure!
One class I'm with now I've seen grow and develop over the years. They're in year 6 now and have the same characteristics as when they were 4/5.
I find this subject fascinating.
I also like child of our time and the ones on secret lives of 4 and 5 year olds etc.

In my experience the ones you fear for often do better than you expect. I've had a few who I thought were headed for misery/prison who ended up doing more or less okay.

Conversely I've known the odd kid who I thought was destined for greatness - the ones who really stand out from the crowd, bright + some kind of x factor. Those kids have gone on to lead fairly regular lives - successful enough but not brilliant. And while I'm happy they're doing well (and hopefully happy) I have felt the occasional pang that they're not running the world!

The ones that have taken me by surprise have been the middling, fairly anonymous kids. Some have really excelled and others have gone the other way sadly.

I loved Child of Our Time - gosh they'd be 23 years old now! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_of_Our_Time

It's interesting seeing the limited information about "where they are now". Parys, Alison Lapper's son, had mental health problems and died of an overdose when he was 19. That's tragic. https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-sussex-55663207

I followed that series because my son was also born in 2000. Reading the wiki updates is sad for some of them.

It’s quite scary how many of the parents divorced from “child of our time”. I think more divorced than stayed together

@PurplePanther1 this sounds great. where are you watching it?

Just to echo others- home life is all.

I've taught a number of children who have gone on to end up in prison. With all of them I would say it was utterly predictable and really sad. They never had a chance....

....but then on the other hand not all children from rough backgrounds have ended up in a mess. So it isn't fully predictable.

And I'd also agree that the ones who have ended up 'big' were not necessarily the ones I'd have predicted. I agree that in my case it was the middle ability, quiet kids who were the ones who went on to 'massive' things (only know a couple in this situation). The high fliers often did well- but in predictable 'I'm a doctor/accountant' type of way.

I'd totally forgotten about those 7 up / Child of our Time programs, I'm definitely going to look them up again.

It's a fascinating subject, definitely. How much core personality is already there, and how is it influenced by circumstances, home life, sometimes just plain good or bad luck?

The man who made the 7 Up series died in 2021. I wonder if anybody will continue to make the programme.

Ive been a teacher for over 30 years. Obviously I dont know how all the children I’ve taught over the years have turned out, but there are a fair few who have surprised me in both a good and bad way.
I know children who ended up in prison, who have become very successful in their careers, who had children very young, who have not had children, who have died prematurely. All I’d say is, you can’t predict with any certainty how most children will turn out.

Its good theres so many great positive teachers now but in the 80s i was tarred with same brush by the teachers because my brother was a rogue. First day at secondary, 'hope you arent like your brother '... horrible teachers. I didn't do well at school because they never believed in me so I thought no matter how i try theyll never give me opportunities. Instead i went to college when old enough, got access to uni ...passed uni and masters. So 2 fingers to those teachers who never give some kids a chance before theyve proved themselves. Champion those kids less fortunate. They need a cheerleader

I sometimes think of Child of Our Time, it was really interesting! I hope they do actually do film them all at 25.