Future proofing. Should we all learn to 'air fry' in our 50s and 60s?

[Mum5net]

Been thinking what skills I need to future proof better.

When DMil was around 85 and could no longer safely use the cooker, DBil bought her a microwave and placed it on the kitchen counter. Immediately she demanded to know why there was a TV set in her kitchen...

Future proof fail on our part. From then on, DMil could never heat her own Wiltshire Farm Food lunches or a M&S ready meal. She wasn't receptive to acquiring the skills and we'd left it too late for her to embrace the convenience of microwaving...

DH and I, early 60s, have bought an air fryer. I don't love it as we steam just about everything. However, remembering where we let Granny down, it will inevitably bring us more cooking choices at Granny's age

I don't think Airfryers are as 'revolutionary as micro waves were. They needed a completely different way of thinking.

My Dad took to it. The timing coincided with my Mother being so poorly.

He used a specialist book by New Zealand chef. Graham Kerr.

At 50, I’ve recently updated my will & joined a gym.

At 74, my dad has POAs in place with my siblings & me & his (excellent) GP & neighbours have our contact details.

When my sister was diagnosed with a terminal illness she gave me a list of all her bank accounts with all relevant details, sort codes, contact numbers, approx value etc. It was so helpful after she died when I was distressed but needed to phone the banks etc. I now keep a similar list which I update every year. On mine I include phone contract details, work employee nos, pension, insurance, passport and driving licence nos etc. It's so helpful to have everything in the one place.

Something that has struck me, watching elderly relatives is to make sure you can do each other’s roles if you are in a relationship. So if you’re the only one to sort the insurance does your partner know how to do it and where the docs are. That sort of thing. Make sure you learn each others roles!

I'm genuinely surprised someone of your MILs generation would be so unfamiliar with a microwave. I'm a few years older than you and my parents had one since the mid 80s until they passed, and it was in regular use!

This is a really interesting thread. I think getting used to speaking to gadgets is worth adding to the list. Siri/google/Alexa - I use them all the time to make notes, check spellings, set reminders and alarms, read the headlines, control the lights.

They're tuned so can't be left on 😊

No air fryer for me, I haven't room for one. I just use the microwave to reheat meals from the community kitchen.

Why are sofa seats so low? I've been shopping for one for ages, but at 67, and hoping that whatever I get will last me until I'm 80, I need one that I can get out of easily for the next dozen years. And I don't want an old person sofa that can be put on blocks. I want a nice one with little stylish legs.

I had a whinge at the Loaf sales guy about their really comfy sofas being too low, and bless him, he said that at their weekly national feedback meeting, he'd make the point that they were losing my demographic who still want nice looking comfy furniture.

Well you can't just leave them on producing heat because of the timer.

OP

I got one for my dad for his birthday, he's mid 80s, able to cook but putting the oven on for one uses a lot of fuel.

You can also either tip out the fryer or use tongs.

@CrapBucket he won't let me get him Alexa, he's been here when I use mine but still it is a 'no'.

I just had the same problem! I have two crappy Artiss recliners I'm replacing, and so many of the chairs I looked at are ridiculously low - 30cm from the floor in one instance! It's hard enough for me, with slightly iffy knees, to get up from low chairs; it's almost impossible for my 90yo, post-stroke mother. Mercifully I found a more-or-less affordable Australian made design a bit higher, more supportive and far more comfortable than these ones.

Climbing walking crosswords / yep all good things

(She also drank sherry and smoked Lambert and Butler every day but not sure that's recommended

No, But it sounds like fun. Good for her.

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Swim. It uses most of your muscles at once, builds strength and stamina, and can be done whatever your size or shape

oh yes, I swam for fitness for 20 years and more. Then I got sick, then the pandemic and I haven’t got back to it. I must. My mental and physical health is so much better after doing Laps at the beach. I don’t think I’m up to swimming beyond the breakers now. Will have to find a salt water pool. Salt water is also marvellous for my skin - it’s a gentle loofah in a way. (Chlorine is too hard on my now dry skin) You just glow when you are a swimmer and you get vit d in the sun - all you need.

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I bought an air fryer 2 months ago (so I won’t have to bend down to the oven) but still haven’t used it. I’ve looked online at air fryer video recipes but nearly everything I’ve found is snack type foods smothered in cheese, or buffalo wings etc. Does Anyone have a starting point for a book/video that has basic nutritious recipes? I’d appreciate being pointed in the right direction. The air fryer came with about 5 recipes, none appealed.

Watching my mother at nearly 90 and she’s spending all her time at doctors, and in their waiting rooms, trying to get back to how she was at 80 - I won’t do that. And dragging her 60 year old children to each appointment - usually twice a week now. Nope, not going to do that. In other words, I won’t become my mother! or my father! (I really fucking hope I won’t)

I’m a reader, my parents were not. I think reading keeps your mind open to different ways of life, different ways of living and thinking.

And one I decided recently. Don't tell your children the thing you most want is to die at home, because if that becomes impossible for any reason, they will beat themselves up about it. I'm going to tell mine that if I can't manage things myself, I am happy to go into sheltered accommodation or a home - whatever is best at the time.

I absolutely agree with this. I’ve said the same to my kids. I’ve done just about everything I can do to my little house so it’s easier to manage it and myself (fortunate to have builders in the family). I now even have a toilet that washes your bum. (I bought an expensive toilet and a cheap sofa lol). But unless I die suddenly there’s likely to be a dependent period. I don’t want my kids doing any of that. I really really don’t. Because I dread the doing of it for my mother.

Sometimes it doesn't matter what skills you have in your 50s and 60s. In her 70s mum was using the Internet extensively for information and shopping etc. Now she has alzheimers she can't even remember how to switch her tablet on.

I bought an air fryer 2 months ago (so I won’t have to bend down to the oven) but still haven’t used it. I’ve looked online at air fryer video recipes but nearly everything I’ve found is snack type foods smothered in cheese, or buffalo wings etc. Does Anyone have a starting point for a book/video that has basic nutritious recipes? I’d appreciate being pointed in the right direction. The air fryer came with about 5 recipes, none appealed.

Try steak.

1 steak, salt and pepper and butter.

Season the steak both sides, put in the air fryer with a knob of butter for 5 mins, turn over using tongs and cook for another 5 mins.

You can put some new potatoes in at the same time wither with the steak or seperated with foil. Obviously you could also cook potatoes and veg in a pan.

Salmon, I use foil for this, put the foil in the air fryer, use an oil spray on the foil then put the steak in skin up - add a little oil to the skin - rub in with your fingers, it takes about 7 mins.

Thanks for that Sassh: both the steak and salmon recipes. Love both foods. And simple enough recipes. 👍

both practical recipes for starting to cook on an air fryer.

I'm 61 and neither have I! It's just a fad.

Just use the air fryer like an oven. The times are slightly quicker but you have to experiment a bit. I have silicon liners in mine which helps brown cauliflower cheese, shepherd's pie etc. but a metal or glass dish the right size would also work. I've also made scones and Yorkshire pudding which wasn't the best but I'll preheat the AF first next time.

No problem.

I'm not against the odd fast food.

Iceland have a load of food that can be air fryered (is that a word?). various potato combinations.

Fishfingers work well too.

Do you like chicken tikka? I make chicken tikka kebabs.

Chopped up chicken left to marinade overnight in yoghurt with spices, thread on to kebab skewers - on their own or you can add chunks of onion, peppers or other veg.

Put foil in the bottom and sort of prop up the kebabs so there is minimal contact with th echicken and foil.

Serve with salad in a pita bread or roti.

The bored of lunch air fryer cookbook is good.

I think the key things for me are keeping mobile and as flexible and strong as possible so that is walking, yoga and strength training. It doesn't have to be fancy.....some cheap hand weights and some YouTube videos if you want to do it at home. I've even done walk at home videos when the weather is rubbish (Leslie Sansone on YouTube is brilliant at this e.g the video below).

Also keeping your brain active. Reading as much as you can, doing puzzles, learning new things. My lovely grandfather did The Telegraph cryptic crossword every day and walked 3 miles a day every day until the week before he died aged 94. I want to emulate him as much as possible.

I honestly think this is more about the type of person you are. My granddad was born in 1920 and died aged 98. He could use an iPad no problem because didn't mind learning about new technology. You seem like the kind of people who are willing to learn and adapt so I wouldn't worry too much :)

It’s been an occasionally painful process, but my 82 y old DM is fully conversant with smart phones, iPads and microwaves. She still plays tennis a couple of times a week, does the crossword every day, and plays bridge. She’s quite a pin up girl for her age group.

However, what is happening, is that she’s losing friends… she’s becoming really quiet lonely.

So… I’d urge anyone approaching (erm…) late middle age….to make friends with younger people.

There’s a lady in our village who’s mid 80s and she hangs out with us 50 somethings. We enjoy her input into conversations and she bounces off our (relative) youth!

You can add your wishes to a Health and Welfare P of A when you set it up.
Dh and I have added something like this:

‘If I should develop dementia, or any other condition where I am unable both to care for myself, and speak - with full mental capacity - for myself, then I emphatically do not want any life-saving or life-prolonging treatment. I ask for palliative care only.’

And make sure whoever will have P of A is well aware anyway.

In a couple of years DH and I are planning a major downsize, partly to free up cash for retirement, but mainly to sort and streamline the stuff we own, and to move to single storey living.

We’ll only be in our late 50s and are currently fit, healthy and ‘young’ for our age, but we’ve watched too many relatives age out in homes they can no longer cope with. We’ve also had to sort out other people’s lifetime accumulations of possessions, clothes and general shite, and it’s grim and stressful - not something we want our kids to have to do.

A lot of people are surprised we’re doing this so early, but to us it’s a positive thing. It’s about taking active control of our later years - choosing where and how we want to live, and designing our surroundings to make it possible for us to live happily and remain in our own home for as long as we’re able.

So yes, I agree that keeping on top of technology etc etc is important as we grow older, but real ‘future-proofing’ is about making some quite big (and difficult) lifestyle choices that acknowledge the inevitable impact of ageing before it’s too late.