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Original poster

No real friends

14 replies

Eveeythingoknotok · 17/10/2023 02:00

I am feeling sad, I am 45 years old, 2 grown up children and 1 in high school. I always thought I would meet my people, like I say to my kids, you will find your people but now I think I am wrong as this has not happened for me.

OP posts:
purpleme12 · 17/10/2023 02:01

I'm sorry it's really hard sometimes isn't it

halfwayacross · 17/10/2023 12:12

Hi,

I was turning in my bed last night, anxious and sad about how I gradually ended up with no friends. I reached for my phone to distract myself and saw your post...

So just wanted to say you are not alone.

Original poster
Eveeythingoknotok · 18/10/2023 01:21

It is hard sometimes, purpleme12 and quite lonely.
Thank you halfway across for commenting, I am glad I am not alone but not glad you are going through this too. I have always been a good friend to others but they just don't seem to stay or they do something to really hurt me, or you know they don't need me for anything. I just don't really understand why I can't make friends who then think a lot of me like I do them and then I just get hurt and lonely again.

OP posts:
LateMumma · 18/10/2023 03:41

I'm so sorry you're going through this, it's awful isn't it? My friendship group shattered a few years ago and I've never really made others to the same level of closeness.

BarelyCoping123 · 18/10/2023 16:49

Just writing to say that I feel this way too. Sorry to OP and all PP for feeling this way.

rocknrollaa · 18/10/2023 16:52

Sorry you are going through this OP, it sounds really rough. I have had times in the past where I've had no friends and felt hopeless too, but now I have a really nice bunch of good pals, so things can definitely change as life ebbs and flows.

What kind of friends are you looking for - what does a 'real friend' mean to you? These are good questions to think about because once you know what you want, you can start thinking about how to get there (and you can!)

Original poster
Eveeythingoknotok · 18/10/2023 23:18

I have had a couple of friends in the past who I have been very close to bit then they have just shit on me, I just want a friend who actually cares, wants to meet up sometimes and you know just put the world to rights and to stick around. I have been very unwell lately and it's just brought home to me how I have very little amount of people who actually care. It's the worst feeling. I was going to join a walking group but they walk so far and I have fibromyalgia so can't do it, I would just like someone.

OP posts:
WinterVibes · 19/10/2023 08:00

I'd rather have one or two decent ones than 20 acquaintances though.
I've find good, reliable friends very hard to come by in my life.

WinterVibes · 19/10/2023 08:01

How old are you, if you don't mind me asking?

Howmanysleepsnow · 19/10/2023 08:14

Same here. Partly I think life gets in the way- 4dc and FT work meant no coffees with school mums after drop off, busy evenings etc. But partly I just struggle to know how to initiate real friendships. And also I think I want friendships that go beyond superficial chitchat and nights out, which may not be what everyone else would like.

Cats1234567 · 19/10/2023 08:19

I get it, same here. Since my diagnosis of MS some so called friends have disappeared. You really do find out who your true friends are when you get a long term condition. Luckily, I have discovered a couple of new friends, who have similar disabilities to me. Have you joined a support group for your fibromyalgia?

Original poster
Eveeythingoknotok · 23/10/2023 02:06

I am 46 years old, I want a real friend not just acquaintances, someone who understands if u can't do something because of my fibromyalgia. I did look into support groups for fibro but they are in the evenings and in the next town over from me and unfortunately I am at my worst after 4pm and I wouldn't drive there and back at the times they have it as its even later like 6pm. I also did have friends before fibromyalgia.

OP posts:
Mary46 · 23/10/2023 09:37

Hi op not easy at this age. I was in a walk group but time not great as dinner time. I didnt go back to it. I have around 3 friends then school mams. I had a friend but I stopped run after her as u should not have to chase anybody. Disheartening at times as you say. Even a concert or cinema nobody commits to it.

Mahad · 22/05/2024 22:54

Hey I'm so sorry about what's happening to you <3 i know I'm a bit late but please know everything's gonna be alright. I recommend chatting online for your people or socializing with your neighbors. I'm so very sorry... i know how this feels

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