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Original poster

Is it ok to just not check the news?

92 replies

Mulligan1789 · 14/10/2023 23:46

Like many, I am finding the images all over the news at the moment incredibly sad. I also find our government’s silence on the unravelling humanitarian situation in Gaza to be absolutely disgraceful.
Is it ok, morally, to just not check the news? I feel I am a worse mother and wife at the moment because I often check my phone for news, hoping against hope for some sort of let up in what is going on, and I am definitely more short tempered.
What do other people do - how can you read this news and not let it affect all of your life? Do you set limits? Advice please. I am prone to depression at times.

OP posts:
TooBigForMyBoots · 15/10/2023 02:36

Yes, it is OK to not check the news.

Don't get me wrong, there is much to be gained from knowing what's going on, politically and geographically.

Realistically it is your relationships, effort and paid work that that improve your life.

MidnightOnceMore · 15/10/2023 03:28

I just read some quality analysis, but not every day. I want to be informed, not traumatised. TV news/videos on SM are extremely intense/upsetting.

NervousVi · 15/10/2023 03:32

Of course it's ok.

My friend only watches kids news (Newsround?) because she likes to stay up to date, but obviously it's presented in a less terrifying and depressing manner!

daisychain01 · 15/10/2023 03:37

It is definitely OK to keep healthy boundaries @Mulligan1789 you have no duty to give yourself a mental health crisis by watching the coverage. Protect yourself from all the images, be kind to yourself.

I was talking to a good friend yesterday about how I have to be completely judgement free about the current situation as my DBRo SIL and DNS live in Tel Aviv. My only priority is that they are safe. I don't crowd my head with the coverage and I don't make judgements about the conflict decisions that I have zero control over. It isn't going to change by me fretting and worrying. My family is what I have to channel my energy, hope and concern towards.

madeinmanc · 15/10/2023 07:20

Yes, it's not just OK it's what we should do. This conflict is thousands of years old and it will continue for thousands of years more, this was said to me by my Israeli friend.

You can't stop it, you can't help.

All that's happening is that the hatred is spreading like cancer already, from all sides. And we are all being manipulated.

All you can do is try to be fair and live in peace with anyone from either side, just as we all were doing before.

The threads should have their own section that can be hidden, it's already been said.

Iamlikesorry · 15/10/2023 07:27

I met up with someone I knew years ago this week and happened to mention that I limited myself re news for many of the reasons already expressed.

I felt she was was very unimpressed though she didn't voice that directly. I felt quite shallow and selfish so these responses have made me feel better!

marchair · 15/10/2023 07:41

I also have had to stop watching the news this week and being a first time mother to a small baby has made it for me even more distressing some how. This thread has given me some comfort. Best to try and switch off for mental health reasons. I feel helpless but there's not a huge amount we can do, apart from donate to charities on the ground.

Beezknees · 15/10/2023 07:45

Course it's fine. I never watch the news. I'm avoiding social medias as well, people are posting photos and videos of dead children and I just don't want to see it.

MoggyP · 15/10/2023 07:48

I don't think it's good to remain in ignorance of the news

But agree that you shouldn't follow it in ways that you are finding unhelpful, so it's right to switch off. And I would suggest reading an actual newspaper in print - you get all the content in a way that is less distressing

GuessingGamer · 15/10/2023 07:50

I too limit what news I read. I tend to listen to the radio or podcasts when I'm driving so I keep up to date with less of the shit stirring that happens on social media or TV.
There's stuff happening all over the world, all the time. The current awfulness is the news of the day from the news outlets.
As @madeinmanc said, it has been going on for thousands of years.
You reading the news isn't going to change it.
Peace for me came when I decided to focus on my family, my health (mental and physical) and my job. I am informed enough to try to vote well in our own elections, and that's all.
If you like listening to things there are some very interesting podcasts out there. Currently listening to one about the Mayan culture. The series is called The Ancients if you are interested at all.
You can remain interested, interesting and informed without ramping up your anxiety and making yourself less available to your little ones.
I'm another who tries to do something useful where I can - donating, being a decent citizen, supporting my friends etc.
I hope you have found some solace in this thread @Mulligan1789

margotrose · 15/10/2023 07:51

Of course it is. I never watch the news.

NancyJoan · 15/10/2023 07:52

I know that as a responsible citizen, I should have a decent awareness of what is happening in the world. However, the daily death toll in 2020 pushed my anxiety levels sky high, so I implemented a news blackout and felt much better for it. I don’t watch TV news now, but do listen to the radio all day.

PhyllisBiscuits · 15/10/2023 07:56

The world is violent and mercurial - it will have its way with you. We are saved only by love - love for each other and the love that we pour into the art we feel compelled to share: being a parent; being a writer; being a painter; being a friend. We live in a perpetually burning building, and what we must save from it, all the time, is love. (Tennessee Williams)

Your love IS the thing. I have felt like this since the invasion of Ukraine started and what's happening in Israel and Palestine has cemented how frightened and disgusted I am by what the world is really like, by what humans can do - something we have been sheltered from for so long, but not anymore. Those children, it's unbearable, unthinkable. I can't stop imagining what they saw and how they felt. I've found it helpful to focus on the people that are good, on the pockets of light in the darkness. Because that's the only place any hope is.

Funderthighs · 15/10/2023 07:57

My mental health improved drastically once I stopped reading the newspapers/watching the news. I keep in touch with local news which is enough.

GuessingGamer · 15/10/2023 07:57

PhyllisBiscuits · 15/10/2023 07:56

The world is violent and mercurial - it will have its way with you. We are saved only by love - love for each other and the love that we pour into the art we feel compelled to share: being a parent; being a writer; being a painter; being a friend. We live in a perpetually burning building, and what we must save from it, all the time, is love. (Tennessee Williams)

Your love IS the thing. I have felt like this since the invasion of Ukraine started and what's happening in Israel and Palestine has cemented how frightened and disgusted I am by what the world is really like, by what humans can do - something we have been sheltered from for so long, but not anymore. Those children, it's unbearable, unthinkable. I can't stop imagining what they saw and how they felt. I've found it helpful to focus on the people that are good, on the pockets of light in the darkness. Because that's the only place any hope is.

A beautiful quote. Thank you for sharing it. I feel like you do

Myneedycat · 15/10/2023 07:57

I don’t watch it anymore. It’s not that I don’t care, but the onslaught of negativity really affects me and I’m trying to protect my own mental health.

blueton · 15/10/2023 07:58

I never watch or read it directly, I read threads here or on Reddit where you get people critiquing it more, and that tends to be more insightful than the news itself.

Myneedycat · 15/10/2023 07:59

PhyllisBiscuits · 15/10/2023 07:56

The world is violent and mercurial - it will have its way with you. We are saved only by love - love for each other and the love that we pour into the art we feel compelled to share: being a parent; being a writer; being a painter; being a friend. We live in a perpetually burning building, and what we must save from it, all the time, is love. (Tennessee Williams)

Your love IS the thing. I have felt like this since the invasion of Ukraine started and what's happening in Israel and Palestine has cemented how frightened and disgusted I am by what the world is really like, by what humans can do - something we have been sheltered from for so long, but not anymore. Those children, it's unbearable, unthinkable. I can't stop imagining what they saw and how they felt. I've found it helpful to focus on the people that are good, on the pockets of light in the darkness. Because that's the only place any hope is.

Love this. It’s so true. Focus on being love for others and on the good in the world.

PuppyMonkey · 15/10/2023 08:03

Like a PP, I keep thinking if this was a few hundred years ago, we wouldn’t know anything about it, no rolling news coverage would have been available, we’d be carrying on with our own lives oblivious. Are we really all better off these days to have all that news at our fingertips?

Also keep wondering about the journalists previously deployed in Ukraine who have just been transferred to Israel now, like, yeah whatever Ukraine, not bothered about you anymore.

Mum2aTeen · 15/10/2023 08:04

Definitely, I stopped when covid hit just so draining and scary at that stage all doom and gloom.
Occasionally, I'll see an news article if I'm interested I'll give a read other then that I listen to the radio on the way to drop off and pick up my son from school and listen the 5 minute news things (just local news nothing big or international) and tbh I feel better for it but still know what's happening locally.

dudsville · 15/10/2023 08:07

I stopped 7 years ago with an event that broke my heart. I was saddened to tears and extreme preoccupation and had to call in sick (I told them why). A colleague at the time told me the stuff people are mentioning up thread, about the overwhelm that can result from hearing about so much tragedy outside of our control. I still know what's going on because references are all around us, and then I sit down now and then and watch a few news channels, but I look for commentary rather than imagery and first hand accounts from those suffering the atrocity.

I think if so much news as being like an unfinished disney plot, just there to wrench my heart out but without an ending.

Myneedycat · 15/10/2023 08:14

PuppyMonkey · 15/10/2023 08:03

Like a PP, I keep thinking if this was a few hundred years ago, we wouldn’t know anything about it, no rolling news coverage would have been available, we’d be carrying on with our own lives oblivious. Are we really all better off these days to have all that news at our fingertips?

Also keep wondering about the journalists previously deployed in Ukraine who have just been transferred to Israel now, like, yeah whatever Ukraine, not bothered about you anymore.

I think about how traumatised those journalists must be already and how much worse it will be for them. Recently attended a talk by Fergal Keane and read his book. Really shocking.

LolaSmiles · 15/10/2023 08:16

It's healthy to limit access to news. We never used to live in an environment with 24hour news. Most news coverage is a lot of repetition with added "what ifs".

My approach is I watch/read the news at main bulletins but not rolling news and online rolling content.

toomanyleggings · 15/10/2023 08:18

I don’t watch it. I struggle to cope with things going on in my own life nevermind taking on other people’s problems

EasternStandard · 15/10/2023 08:21

The news set up is purposely to impact you, mostly negatively

I don’t watch it (bar once this week, and that was enough). I haven’t for years

I do listen to radio daily and the frequency of news headlines is high, too high in some cases so switch

Of course headlines get repeated on here too

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