This is going to be long!
My DD 11 (just started secondary school) has been bullied by a girl since Y4 both verbally and online including tik tok hate videos, most of which she hasn't seen luckily because I keep her off social media and there have been a lot of threats that the girls family (who are involved in drugs) will come after her.
It got to the point in Y5 that she was a different child and lost all her confidence, was anxious and crying all the time and was seeing the school ELSA every morning just to get her into school. Things settled a bit in Y6 when she made some new friends who were really supportive.
Primary's approach was pitiful to be honest and I was constantly in and out and they never kept me informed unless I chased.
I couldn't get her to a different secondary school to the girl because of the catchment rules here but I have her on a waiting list and made sure they wouldn't be in the same class.
So I hoped moving to secondary would be a fresh start for but two weeks in when the girl attacked my DD and her friends at break time and then she and her older sister cornered my daughter outside the gates on her way home and threatened to hit her and told her their family was going to beat me up too. The new school was fantastic as soon as I spoke to them, suspending them both instantly BUT said that the girls' explanation had been that my DD had bullied her specifically she had hit her. I said that to my knowledge that had never happened.
At the same time the girls Mum was posting on her FB that she was going to "sort out" both me and my daughter and rallying people to help.
I spoke to my DD about the "hit" and she broke down and admitted that in Y6 the girl had grabbed her fingers and said she was going to break them so she had slapped her and that school had punished my DD for it but NOT TOLD ME!!! They had told her "there was no excuse" despite the bullying history so she thought i wouldn't believe her either - she hadn't told me because she was so ashamed. I don't condone violence in any form but had a hard time telling her off for this.
So in my situation WWYD the bully is now using my DD defending herself as justification for continuing her campaign and is clearly telling people she is the victim. My DD and I are both now being threatened by the girls family and I'm not sure how to handle things from here honestly. I just want this to end for her 😪
Thanks x