Struggling with my daughters behaviour

[Maevess]

She is 5. Very confident, articulate, has lots of friends, loves learning and behaves impeccably at school.

At home she is a mixed bag. Sometimes she’s very helpful, plays with her siblings, very loving. She just WILL NOT do anything I ask her until I have asked her so many times I get angry with her and then she either doesn’t care or cries. If she doesn’t want to do something she just says no or tries to bargain some kind of reward from it. I feel like I’ve got no leverage to persuade her to do anything and feel like I’m failing as a mum.

Any advice gratefully received

Only ask her to do the things that really matter, like teeth cleaning.
Do not allow any bargaining, she is in control if you allow that. If she doesn’t do the thing, she is punished but you must follow through every time, so make sure it’s a punishment that you will/can follow through with.

Pick your battles but remind her it can be give and take. Rewards work best. Try the star chart system.

Well if she Don.t like it there is always the bedroom to go to...your the boss. Not her...or get a naughty chair..or bottom step of the stairs..but you are mum not her friend.