My parents and PIL have not one comfortable seat between them

[Anothernamechangeee]

Talking about Christmas last night with husband and where to spend it I realised that I don’t really feel fully relaxed in either house. Because neither of them have any comfortable seats.

both have those quite small, upright sofas which only have space for 2 people so no lounging. They both have the hard wooden farmhouse chairs at the dinner table.

any individual armchairs have wooden arms. The whole effect is that it’s all a bit hard and cold and formal to sit the whole time.

we have a nice mix of squishy sofas and more upright armchairs and our dining chairs are padded so you can sit in them comfortably for a long time over dinner

do people of a certain age just prefer uncomfortable furniture?! Thinking of their beds they also all favour small doubles with quite thin mattresses

Yes!! My parents house is like this! Apparently sofas are for sitting on (with your feet flat on the floor) not sprawling on! 🙄

do people of a certain age just prefer uncomfortable furniture?!

what the heck. It’s nothing to do with age.

Ha! Yes, I don’t think I ever saw my parents or grandparents sitting on their sofa without their feet firmly planted on the floor.
My dad’s chosen relaxing chair was at the kitchen table.

It’s a generational thing though surely?

Yep I do think it’s a generational thing. My ex in laws are the same. Everything is hard and upright. I don’t think they appreciate slouching in a soft sofa as much as we all seem to 😳😆

How old are they?

I don't think it's an age/generational thing at all. My grandparents (who died years ago in their 80s) and the most amazingly comfortable chairs and sofa in their sitting room. I can still remember what they were like and I haven't sat in one for 20 years. Actually, my other grandparents had an amazing 70s style corner sofa too that could fit about 6 people on.

Not sure it’s a generational thing, my parents are in their 80’s and have a lovely corner sofa that we can have an afternoon nap on.

My in-laws on the other hand, have the two seater upright sofa which doesn’t offer any comfort. It’s a billion years old but apparently people in their 70’s don’t waste money on sofas (their finances are very healthy).

It's natural to lose a bit of mobility as you become elderly and it's easier to get in and out of a firmer chair.

Take a beanbag with you? Or host?

With regards to firmness and upright-ness (?😂), older people I know find it difficult to get up out of really squishy sofas and chairs.

My parents also have the absolutely beautiful but bum numbing farmhouse dining chairs, but they don't object to me bringing the cushions from my outside furniture to comfy them up at Christmas! Ditto the small very firm beds.

They do have the most fabulous sofa for lounging though, it's older than me and is just the comfiest, snuggliest thing in the world.

Sometimes the furniture is a matter of space.
Houses are getting larger.
Could you not, as a gift, purchase some dining chairs of a similar size and style but with padded seats.
Or could you not buy them a set of chair cushions as a Christmas gift?

Large squishy comfy sofas are often hard to get back out of. Chairs with strong arms are more secure for older people to ward off falls.

My parents who were born late 1920s and early 1930s had very comfortable furniture. Padded dining chairs, large sofa, arm chairs and more upright chairs.
As he got older my Dad found firmer, more upright chair more comfortable. I never saw either of them lie down on the sofa. If he wanted to stretch out he'd go up and lie on the bed.

So, I'd agree that sitting habits might be generational but not having uncomfortable furniture.

I'm in my early 60s and happily lounge on my sofa 😄

We’d love to host but my parents have recently moved house and really want to host and my PIL live far away so we take it in turns

Classic MN 😆

my parents would not see comfy dining chairs as a good gift because they like the hard wooden ones!

My mother has commented that my sofa is lovely to sit on but impossible to get off of. Similar with the bed... lovely mattress but the whole thing is a bit too low.

I think it’s a generation rather than age thing as my parents sofas have always been like this and neither have any mobility issues even now in their mid 70’s!

And it wouldn’t be a gift to them but to yourself!

My ex husband's grandmother lived in a small 2 bedroom house and downstairs it only had a gallery kitchen and a pretty small lounge. In that lounge she had 14 ( yes really) 14 chairs. None of them were comfortable, in fact she'd say herself " oh sit on a dining chair as that's the most comfortable one"
OMG why have you got 14 bloody chairs. A dining chair is fine for a short time to sit on and eat a meal but " oh yes they are so comfortable to sit on for a couple of hours while watching a film " said no one ever!

How old are they?

Late 60s / early 70s. No mobility / health issues

Yes same for my MIL and there are certain chairs we are not allowed to sit on. Never understood it. I sat on her sofa the other day and I saw her wince! I think I sat down too quickly. I’m not sure why they’re so protective over their sofas.

Detake a cushion with you then!

My parents have two very small hard two seater sofas in their TV room. They are so uncomfortable.
the sitting room sofas are very slightly more comfortable but they are for fancy occasions only and definitely no lounging on them.
They also have very small double beds. They were born in the early 1950s in Ireland and there’s very much a sense of keeping furniture pristine.
my husband is a 6’4” ex rugby player and he says he feels like he’s in a dolls house and can’t wait to leave!!

My dad would never let us lie on the sofa, insisting that we sat bolt upright with our feet on the floor. Which was bloody uncomfortable as the sofa was too deep for me to do both at the same time.