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Original poster

I think I'm starting to regret our 'doer upper' house

8 replies

simplethepimple · 02/10/2023 21:36

Bought our 'dream' home 4 years ago in an areas that we really wanted but yet never goes on the market simply because people never leave. However we were lucky enough that the couple before us wanted to move to Scotland to be with their daughter and family. Anyway, we bought the house and it was dated. We knew this but I suppose we got carried away with the fact that it was perfect size, location and close to all parents etc. problem is we just can't seem to get the work done. Yea we've done lots of bits but we really need a new kitchen, utility and our bedroom would benefit from having an en-suite but with everything being so expensive we just can't seem to make it all happen so now I'm at the stage were I'm embarrassed because it looks so old and through other and I regret buying it.

Tell me your positive stories of your once horrible homes to keep me from crying

OP posts:
yoshiblue · 02/10/2023 21:40

Seriously, you do not 'need' a utility or en suite bedroom!!! I live in a lovely period home without those features and I am happy.

If money is tight there are ways to redo a kitchen, even fitting some of it yourself. Think creatively.

I believe strongly in living in a home and doing it up over time. You don't need it all today.

TheChosenTwo · 02/10/2023 21:42

Ahh I had so many times of feeling like this, usually when we had torn yet another wall down and our house was once again under another dust cloud and I was sending my kids to school looking like they’d slept under a volcanic ash eruption… I’m sure the school had my girls on a watch list 😂
And when we had our roof taken off and the tin roof was overlapped wrong and it rained and water was pouring into our house through all the upstairs bedroom light fittings…
and when the stairs that had been carefully measured didn’t fit and the only way of getting up and down was a ladder for a couple of weeks. That was fun with a 6 month old baby and 2 older and more adventurous kids 🫣
we’ve been here 15 years this year and I can safely say it has ALL been worth it and I absolutely love our home. Blood sweat and a lot of (my) tears but we’ve made it totally our own. Dh owns a building company which has been both a curse and a blessing.
Keep going, one day it will all click into place and you’ll be so glad you started. It might not be one day soon but it will happen!

Original poster
simplethepimple · 02/10/2023 21:45

yoshiblue · 02/10/2023 21:40

Seriously, you do not 'need' a utility or en suite bedroom!!! I live in a lovely period home without those features and I am happy.

If money is tight there are ways to redo a kitchen, even fitting some of it yourself. Think creatively.

I believe strongly in living in a home and doing it up over time. You don't need it all today.

This is exactly what I need to hear 🙂

OP posts:
Abfab63 · 02/10/2023 21:46

We bought our house four years ago. Not our dream, forever home but a very attractive, period doer upper nonetheless. I almost immediately regretted it once I realised the extent and cost of putting it back together.

It was an absolute bone of contention between me and my partner, we had many arguments over it and I honestly thought about putting it on the market many times. BUT we stuck at it, ploughed on through the endless tradies coming back and forth, the mess, mishaps, dust, the heating breaking, leaks, rats, shoddy work, mould, you bloody name it. It was a pain in my arse BUT we now have a really beautiful home that may well be our forever home.

I'm incredibly proud of what we achieved and the home we've made. I would also probably do it again which says a lot as once is accepted what a shit show it was. It was quite fun!

It's a long road but it is worth it IF you have access to the funds to make it happen. I think I would struggle to do it very slowly.

Hopefully that sort of helps 🥴

kweeble · 02/10/2023 21:47

I agree you don’t need the en-suite and can decorate your bedroom fairly cheaply.
As for the kitchen, whilst I would save up longer term for structural work, for now you could replace the doors, worktops and tiles and do your best to declutter and organise things well.

Original poster
simplethepimple · 02/10/2023 21:47

TheChosenTwo · 02/10/2023 21:42

Ahh I had so many times of feeling like this, usually when we had torn yet another wall down and our house was once again under another dust cloud and I was sending my kids to school looking like they’d slept under a volcanic ash eruption… I’m sure the school had my girls on a watch list 😂
And when we had our roof taken off and the tin roof was overlapped wrong and it rained and water was pouring into our house through all the upstairs bedroom light fittings…
and when the stairs that had been carefully measured didn’t fit and the only way of getting up and down was a ladder for a couple of weeks. That was fun with a 6 month old baby and 2 older and more adventurous kids 🫣
we’ve been here 15 years this year and I can safely say it has ALL been worth it and I absolutely love our home. Blood sweat and a lot of (my) tears but we’ve made it totally our own. Dh owns a building company which has been both a curse and a blessing.
Keep going, one day it will all click into place and you’ll be so glad you started. It might not be one day soon but it will happen!

Thanks so much. My parents moved into a dungeon 25 years ago but now it's an amazing home that has been built over the years with love and time. I think I just stress because we just seem to be doing things slowly and I am impatient lol

OP posts:
User26494 · 02/10/2023 21:47

Get onto Instagram or tiktok and search out the renovation style videos, lots of them are doing up kitchens themselves. If the layout is fine and the carcass is fine then you really can DIY a kitchen.

Original poster
simplethepimple · 02/10/2023 21:50

kweeble · 02/10/2023 21:47

I agree you don’t need the en-suite and can decorate your bedroom fairly cheaply.
As for the kitchen, whilst I would save up longer term for structural work, for now you could replace the doors, worktops and tiles and do your best to declutter and organise things well.

Unfortunately the kitchen just needs ripped out. It's a terrible layout and it's just horrible and I'd rather spend £500/1000 on getting something else done instead which is such a shame because if it were a option it would be a tremendous help

OP posts:
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