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Original poster

Contacted by children services

20 replies

justamommy9 · 02/10/2023 14:30

Hi there, my 6,5 month old boy fell off the bed on Saturday (we cosleep). Me and my husband went downstairs to get something to eat and left LO in bedroom on a bed, he had cushions around him but managed to roll over. He seemed to be fine after the accident but we rang 111 for an advice. They told us to attend A&E so we did. Little one got checked,not a single scratch on him, no injury so they were happy to send us home, been told he's absolutely fine and that it happens to almost every baby. You can imagine the mum guilt that hit me.Today i received a phone call from children services - asked how little was, what happened and if they could contact hospital to confirm my version of the story. Is this standard procedure?

OP posts:
SleepyJim · 02/10/2023 14:32

Absolutely normal safeguarding procedure.

cryinglaughing · 02/10/2023 14:32

Yes, standard procedure, as it should be.

Ellie525 · 02/10/2023 14:32

Did you tell them you had gone downstairs and left him? If so then yes definitely standard procedure as that would raise a flag sorry 😬 (plenty of babies roll off beds but parents are usually in same room as them or possibly next room at a push..)

RaisingCornishWildlings · 02/10/2023 14:33

I don't know what's normal policy but back in the spring when my 18m old wasn't much over a year, she had an accident and hurt her leg which we were concerned might have been fractured. Minor injuries were fab, and the next day I was surprised to have a call from the health visiting team. But the lady was really kind and just said it was a follow up, to reassure me more than anything that accidents happen and not to worry!

obje · 02/10/2023 14:36

My friends Dd broke her arm in nursery - born parents in work at the time. Both left and went to hospital. Horrible experience but all okay.

They were taken into separate rooms and formally interviewed on what had happened - despite the fact that the nursery manager had confirmed neither were there and it had happened under her care.

I think they are ultra ultra cautious

Mistressanne · 02/10/2023 14:38

In future do not leave your baby on their own on a bed surrounded by cushions. He’s not safe, babies move more than you think.
You should have a cot to put him in when you can’t watch him properly.
SS will likely advise you the same. Be willing to listen and you’ll be fine.

Lavender14 · 02/10/2023 14:39

Normal safeguarding procedure.

Not going to have a go because you've said you feel guilty already but that's not a safe set up for co sleeping. There's lots of great resources online, I found the happy Co sleeper on Instagram really good for advice on safe set up etc so maybe check it out. They recommend no pillows because of the suffocation/rebreathing risk and obv at 6.5 they're too mobile for that to keep them in anyway. You could also try switching to a floor bed or mattress on the floor or if something lower isn't an option get a rail for your bed and sleep with baby at that side. You can totally Co sleep safely but just need the right set up. I don't co sleep much but was really lucky and we had a fab midwife who gave me lots of advice on it because in her mind, if you're breastfeeding in bed in the wee hours, chances are you'll dose over anyway so best be set up for safe Co sleeping anyway.

Bookish88 · 02/10/2023 14:40

obje · 02/10/2023 14:36

My friends Dd broke her arm in nursery - born parents in work at the time. Both left and went to hospital. Horrible experience but all okay.

They were taken into separate rooms and formally interviewed on what had happened - despite the fact that the nursery manager had confirmed neither were there and it had happened under her care.

I think they are ultra ultra cautious

There's safeguarding and then there's just an absolutely pointless waste of everyone's time, which this example clearly is.

In your case OP, you basically did a stupid thing and no doubt you'll learn from it but it's very normal for them to contact you to check in.

Soontobe60 · 02/10/2023 14:40

Where does your baby sleep during the daytime? I hope you don't pop him in your bed and leave him!

TomatoSandwiches · 02/10/2023 14:43

Very normal as others have said, perhaps you could ask your Health Visitor for safe sleep information as what you were doing isn't suitable.

SisterMichaelsHabit · 02/10/2023 14:44

Yes the exact same thing happened to us at same age (sans pillows/cushions). LO rolled over for the first time ever... straight off our bed onto the hardwood floor while I was downstairs sorting something for our toddler. I still cringe when I remember the bang. At the hospital they asked me over and over and over how it happened and had to take DD for a CAT scan as they were worried it was a fracture, but she had a mild haematoma and recovered fine in 12 weeks.

It was terrifying getting the visit (we got a visit at the hospital) because it brought up all sorts of bad memories of SS involvement from my own childhood but they saw the baby was fine and went on their way. In our case they stripped her off and a consultant paed checked her over in front of the social worker and they saw she had literally no other injuries at all.

It's going to be fine. Some of them go in hard because they deal with a lot of hardened bastards who lie and lie, unfortunately all you can do is go with it and write the whole thing off later as another part of a horrible event that will be behind you soon.

Edited for clarification of some details.

Original poster
justamommy9 · 02/10/2023 14:45

thanks all for the replies, yes i know this was silly of me and definitely won't happen again. He is in his crib for all his daytime naps, and in the evening I usually go to bed with him and don't leave him for a second - this was a one off, i had busy day where i didn't have a time to have anything to eat and hubby cooked tea so we wanted to have a quick meal together - already regret it.

OP posts:
TheShellBeach · 02/10/2023 14:46

Why doesn't he sleep in a cot? It's much safer.

SisterMichaelsHabit · 02/10/2023 14:47

justamommy9 · 02/10/2023 14:45

thanks all for the replies, yes i know this was silly of me and definitely won't happen again. He is in his crib for all his daytime naps, and in the evening I usually go to bed with him and don't leave him for a second - this was a one off, i had busy day where i didn't have a time to have anything to eat and hubby cooked tea so we wanted to have a quick meal together - already regret it.

Just also sending you a very un-mumsnetty hug as I know how shaken this sort of thing can make you. No one ever wants their baby to get hurt.

Fiddlerdragon · 02/10/2023 14:48

It’s normal op. My ds managed to break his arm at an adventure park and we were contacted by ss. The accident was actually caught on cctv (the park has to do an investigation into every injury so they can rule out faulty equipment). It’s just hospital procedure to notify someone and you get a call from ss or your health visitor

Overthebow · 02/10/2023 14:48

justamommy9 · 02/10/2023 14:45

thanks all for the replies, yes i know this was silly of me and definitely won't happen again. He is in his crib for all his daytime naps, and in the evening I usually go to bed with him and don't leave him for a second - this was a one off, i had busy day where i didn't have a time to have anything to eat and hubby cooked tea so we wanted to have a quick meal together - already regret it.

It’s standard procedure. Cooperate with them and it’ll be fine. It was a stupid thing to do but you’ve learnt and we all do stupid things, especially when tired and hungry.

magic9 · 02/10/2023 14:50

My DS has been to a&e for ruptured ear drums etc and the health visitor will still call days after to make sure he is okay

HateMyRubbishBoss · 02/10/2023 15:07

Sadly in this country they’re calling children’s services for really stupid things let alone something like this

Somehow they need to train the “reporter” to use some sort of judgement before wasting people ‘s time in silliness!

Original poster
justamommy9 · 02/10/2023 15:11

i did, yes, didn't want lie even though i knew it was my fault, wanted to give them all details so they could check him knowing everything.

OP posts:
VariantHela · 02/10/2023 15:23

Mistressanne · 02/10/2023 14:38

In future do not leave your baby on their own on a bed surrounded by cushions. He’s not safe, babies move more than you think.
You should have a cot to put him in when you can’t watch him properly.
SS will likely advise you the same. Be willing to listen and you’ll be fine.

This.

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