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Original poster

Friend makes me talk to her partner-would you say something?

59 replies

paintitgreennn · 02/10/2023 08:56

So my friend of 10 years has been with her partner 5 years.
He is a nice guy and when in social situations we get along fine.
The annoying thing is when she rings me ,she always puts her partner on the phone to speak to me.
"Oh I'm gonna wash up talk to Chris "
So me and him are on the phone trying to make polite conversation-you can hear the poor sod in the background saying no.
Last night was probably the worst
She rang me and we spoke for 10 mins
She hands him the phone and says she's jumping in the bath
After a few mins I said I'm just going to sort kids out-have a lovely night and tell her il text her later.
Am I wrong to tell her it's making us a bit uncomfortable?

OP posts:
MariePaperRoses · 02/10/2023 13:13

Just hang up.

Alopeciabop · 02/10/2023 13:13

maybe She just wants you all to be friends and have a nice relationship where you all get on. I think she’s just trying to foster a relationship between you and her dh or she thinks there already is one and you’re all just chatting and enjoying company. It’s sweet. if he’s dull just make it quick. Or just make sure you end the convo with her first before she gets the chance. But otherwise you could just suggest a double date and try to become closer with them both. She’s going for a family friends super close relationship thing is my theory

Amy8 · 02/10/2023 13:18

Tell her whyyy that's weird

The fact you've been doing it makes her think it's okay.

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FoxClocks · 02/10/2023 13:20

I'd probably say hi and how is he, if she already passed him the phone just to be polite then say you have to be getting on. Alternatively if he has a good sense of humour set up a prank and get him to ask her about some outrageous piece of gossip about her you've told him or something.

Weathermonger · 02/10/2023 13:31

OMG my sister does this with my BIL. The man can spend 30 minutes talking about a piece of string. No one willingly subjects themselves to a conversation with him, so my sister always insists he picks up every phone call (both retired), so whoever is calling is forced to listen to his pontificating. I gave up long ago, and I only text now.

OceanicBoundlessness · 02/10/2023 14:44

She can wash up on speaker phone and talk in the bath.

ohsuzannah · 02/10/2023 15:38

Oh God my dp does this when he's on the phone to his Dss. I absolutely hate it and feel like slapping him 😡
No idea what he/she is thinking doing that.
One Christmas I was bald after having chemo ( video call) I didn't wear hats or wigs at home because I hate anything on my head. He came straight over and turned the camera on me. I mean, really?

BlueSky2023 · 02/10/2023 15:46

It sounds like she is trying to force a friendship between you and her partner, I find it strange.
Some people really do try to force their partners on all their friends and family, they want to play happy family’s whether her the partner and friends want to or not.

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romdowa · 02/10/2023 15:51

You need to end the call first by making her talk to your partner 🤣🤣 any time I ring my dad he puts me on with the dog. Say hello to ddog and then all you can hear is barking

Stephisaur · 02/10/2023 16:20

I'd buy her some wireless headphones for Christmas so she learns that, actually, you can talk on the phone and do other things! ;)

Joking aside, as much as I love my friends husbands and could happily talk to them all day, I'd call them if that's what I wanted. Tell her she's being weird and have done with it.

lto2019 · 02/10/2023 16:45

Weathermonger · 02/10/2023 13:31

OMG my sister does this with my BIL. The man can spend 30 minutes talking about a piece of string. No one willingly subjects themselves to a conversation with him, so my sister always insists he picks up every phone call (both retired), so whoever is calling is forced to listen to his pontificating. I gave up long ago, and I only text now.

😂😂😂

MeinKraft · 02/10/2023 16:47

Well what you should do is pass the phone to YOUR partner and run away Grin

CapEBarra · 02/10/2023 16:49

I’d just play dumb and say ‘ok, byeeeee’ and put the phone down.

multiholk · 02/10/2023 16:53

I have a friend that does this ! I hate it sooooo much.

you Are not alone, yes it is very odd.

MariePaperRoses · 02/10/2023 16:55

Where is the made/make me in all this?

No one is making you talk to her husband.

You are going along with it.

Oioicaptain · 02/10/2023 17:01

Do you not have a partner that you can pass her partner over to? That would make it more fun.

Chickychickybye · 02/10/2023 22:36

This is v strange. I’ve had friends do this to me in the past and it makes me feel massively awkward. A big no from me. And a massive cringe

dudsville · 02/10/2023 22:41

Get her dh on board. "Hey chris, i don't know why she keeps doing this. Was there something she wanted you to tell me? (Obviously the answer will be no), so shall we just both politely decline the next time she hands you the phone?". He may be trapped in some notion of politeness and could be relieved at having this acknowledged and problem solved.

CorvusPurpureus · 02/10/2023 22:49

<shaky whisper> 'OMG Chris, I know she doesn't want me to talk about it...but I can't keep quiet any longer. You do...know about the...well, you know about it...the thing under the shed, right?
...shit! Shit shit shit...dh is coming back from the loo...look, you guys can't just LEAVE it there!' <slam brrrr>.

That should give them something to talk about over the washing up.

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 02/10/2023 23:13

Just txt her and say "could you please stop putting me on the phone to chat to your DP? As lovely as he is, it's awkward as hell!"

TiredMum30 · 02/10/2023 23:38

This is so weird 😂 my dh would just put the phone down without saying a word if I tried to do this to him 🤣

Cammac · 03/10/2023 09:35

“<shaky whisper> 'OMG Chris, I know she doesn't want me to talk about it...but I can't keep quiet any longer. You do...know about the...well, you know about it...the thing under the shed, right?
...shit! Shit shit shit...dh is coming back from the loo...look, you guys can't just LEAVE it there!' <slam brrrr>.

That should give them something to talk about over the washing up”

Brilliant! 😂😂😂