Slowing down as you get older - what does it mean?

[GreenMushrooms]

Inspired by one of the threads on age gap relationships, I would love to know what kind of changes younger people can expect as they age. Specifically into 40s, 50s age 60s: Pre-retirement.

For example, I've seen on other threads posters talking about people "wanting to slow down in their 50s". What does this mean? What kind of thing were you doing in your 30s and 40s, which you don't do in your 50s due to "slowing down"? Or what changes have you noticed in others or do you expect to see in yourself?

For context, I'm 36 and I feel pretty slow already, and I can imagine getting slower (e.g. I do similar things to my older colleagues and parents). What are other people doing in their 30s that they won't do in their 50s?

I don’t do late nights and I don’t have to run around after young dc.

I do have a much more stressful job and work longer hours these days but am planning to give that up soon before it kills me. It’s not so much slowing as wanting to re-dress my work life balance and have more time for the things I want to do.

Everything aches a little more for sure.

Love all these comments. Such a range of responses! Thank you. Love to hear about the people still taking care of grandkids, travelling, walking, swimming, horseriding skiing etc. Also the lazy mornings and doing things at your own pace

I possibly never had it to begin with 😅😅

Late 40s, just retrained and completing an MSc and going into a new career now DC are teens. Can’t wait to be ‘me’ again after being at everyone’s beck and call. Not slowing down.

PS. Great question though, OP!

I think some of it is traditional assumptions about kids grown-up and left home, and you approach retirement, and retirement itself being “slower paced”. But as ever, few of us are leading that traditional life!

im early 50s, and don’t have kids. I’ve never been particularly sporty, so I’m not seeing a change there. I think a lot is about self-acceptance that comes with getting older …. I enjoy going out socially still, but I’m far more accepting of what I like & don’t now. I go out because I want to, not because it’s Friday / Saturday and I “should”. I’m on holiday on my own at the moment- I’m doing stuff at “my” pace, it’s not slower than in years gone by, but it is just “me”.

I'm almost 60 but have had two serious illnesses in the last 5 years.
This has made me more cautious about what I do.

58 here. Running ultra marathons! 😁 slowly mind you but determined to stay out in the woods and on the rocky trails for as long as possible. Joints etc definitely hurt more which I find frustrating, cannot believe I'm approaching the back end of 60. It's not computing mentally at all, how did it happen! I honestly think I'm fitter than I was in my 30's though so age not as much of a barrier as people imagine.

I’m 63 and retired , I think I have slowed down , in that I’m more cautious because I know that if I injure myself it will take longer to recover !
A simple cut takes a week and a couple of plasters , it used to take a wipe with a tissue and a dab of Savlon
I cannot do late nights , will be wiped out the next day
I’ve started running ( slowly ) outside , we’re already thinking about joining the gym just for the winter in case the ground freezes and we slip over (DSis a bit younger than me feels the same )
Back in the summer DH and I went for a long (10 mile ) walk and the following day we were like stroppy tired toddlers , it was awful !

Sorry just to add, definitely changed socially, say no to a lot more things but don't care. My interests have changed and that's ok I think

I’m 43 and am only getting over the shock that my back knees and joints don’t allow me to do as much and I can’t keep up in work with the 20yos, I work in retail moving around a lot of boxes, running up and down stairs and there’s times I just run out of steam and start walking. I used to play football etc with the kids and now I have slowed up ridiculously!! It’s just really that your body doesn’t always allow you to do what you could before at the same speed even if you’re doing the same amount or more activity wise! Saying thaa ad t you have to use it or lose it but that just means pushing yourself/ cheering yourself on more and rewarding yourself with more time in bed when you can😅

I have noticed my friends do more lunches than evenings out now, and I don’t drink as much these days.
I am just finishing a degree, I have completely retrained for the second part of my life, so I don’t think my intellect has been impacted. My memory for names has gone to shit though.

I am not the elegant older lady I imagined I would be, I am in fact just an older version of myself which is weird. My style has barely changed, I have just adapted it slowly to my changing body shape, longer lengths etc. I am not frumpy.
I am very body confident because I genuinely don’t care about things like cellulite, extra inches etc. As a result my teen dds have grown up to be very comfortable with their own bodies. They do not expect to be objectified/judged. We do what we like!

I can hike 10 miles I used to be able to do 20. I went to a wedding a few days ago. Had a great time but both DH and I were really tired for next couple of days. I looked after my friends toddler all day, I did as little as possible the next day as so tired. I’m 57. People saying I’m 40 something honestly it was post menopause for me which was 52.

Nearly 67 here. Probably not much different to a decade ago. My most active decade was definitely 45-55 when we retired, moved abroad, renovated a couple of houses and volunteered at a library/social centre. We had a very active social life and walked a lot and swam regularly. Since returning a decade ago we've renovated a place and done the garden from scratch but are now glad there's only day to day maintenance to worry about. DH always said he had another renovation in him but he no longer thinks that. We still spend quite a bit of time abroad even though we no longer have our own place. I think this means when we're in the UK we are quite relaxed about doing not a lot.😀

I was never a big socialise but I find I have absolutely no interest in going out in evenings. Might go out for a meal a couple of times a month but I prefer lunches and just have nights in.
I feel sorry for so many ex work colleagues who seem to have retired and turned into childminders for their grandchildren. Even a couple who dropped ons day now spend them doing this.

Volunteering for something I have a passion for. Finally feel as if I have skills ! Plus the time to give.

Only thing I've noticed is that I get more tired after exercising and babysitting grandkids, and hangovers take days to get over instead of just feeling ill the next day. Those things slow me down.

I have a lot less energy now in my 50's. I think it's menopause.

For example I used to work in a European city, get a flight home then drive to the gym, do an hour there before going home and cooking dinner or maybe going to the pub with friends for the last hour. That makes me feel queasy to think of it now.!

I turned 50 last year, and also have been period free for just over 15 months, and I’ll be honest, I have never had so much energy!

It may be due to being diabetic (& last month being diagnosed with Chronic Kidney Disease) so my diet is the best it’s ever been, or that I’m having to do care twice a day for my Mum on top of everything else, so I’m always on the go.

I have a physical disability too for which I take fistfuls of medications (Mum doesn’t, she just doesn’t take care of herself/cleaning her home/personal care etc., no medical or physical issues, but that’s a whole other topic) so my twin sis has suggested it’s opiates & pure bloody mindedness keeping me going 😂. I can’t sit still on pregabalin either!

Both of my parents just stopped doing anything post 50, whereas I see every day as an opportunity to learn, or explore, or just do something. My sister & I are the same, so perhaps it’s not wanting history to repeat itself that propels us forwards.

I'm 59 and now think twice before doing cartwheels and handstands.
On the other hand I now cycle 10 miles to work. In my 20s, 30s and 40s I always used the tube.
I've also taken up wild swimming.
My energy levels are good but my body is losing flexibilty.

I'm 44.

I have never had a faster pace of life - I was diagnosed with a chronic pain condition at 20 which I've had since I was 14.

I've always got more tired than everyone else, I never really did late nights and these days I go to bed about 8.

After an accident 10 years ago I had to relearn how to walk with hydrotherapy and physio, that was pretty fast paced and bloody painful.

I'm coming up to 50. I do notice that I'm not as sharp mentally as I used to be. I work in a job which involves using my brain and it's fine, but I used to be really quick at picking up new concepts when I was younger.

I am fairly physically active, but I've run several half marathons in the past and I can't see myself doing another one tbh.

I still like a good night out, just not as often as I used to. I would actively try to avoid going out two nights in a row these days.

So overall not a massive change but just a bit "less" of everything.