Are all children ADHD/ADD

[GameOverBoys]

I have just completed a bunch of those checklist things for my DS as I’m curious if he might be ADD/ADHD. He scored highly and I’m wondering if any children don’t score.
Are there children who you don’t have to remind everyday to brush their teeth? Or tidy their room? Isn’t it normal for children to fidget and not want to do homework?
Amongst my friends kids DS seems completely normal in most regards. The only big difference is he really struggles to occupy himself unless he has a screen. He doesn’t play and never has. His favourite activity is following me around and talking a lot.
So has anyone filled in an ADHD checklist and had it say your child isn’t ADHD/ADD?

I just did one of those tests for DS and it came out as an indication of ADHD. He really hasn't got ADHD, the questions were just normal things for a teen and most of the questions I answered with "sometimes", "rarely" or "never". They are dangerous things to have hanging around on the internet if they are leading people with NT children to believe their child isn't NT.

It’s about frequency and intensity rather than do they do it- yes or no. If I had pain occasionally is that normal? Yes, it’s normal to have pain. If I was in excruciating pain most of the time could it be an issue? Probably so.

So, yes you are right all children will exhibit signs and symptoms of ADHD. It is completely normal. Most children are hyperactive and inattentive. It’s the extent and pervasiveness that is the difference.

I think the check list type things are pretty useless. I've just done full assessments for two of my DC and I could recognise traits in myself which mean the check lists would probably indicate I have ADHD. However, I could also see the ways in which I was different to my DC which made it clear to me that I don't.

If most of the responses are sometimes/rarely/never, that doesn't generally indicate ADHD. ADHD is usually indicated by having a high proportion of often/very often. Everyone forgets things sometimes, ADHD is more like when you forget everything all the time. (To take one random symptom as an example).

Also, are you comparing against an adult, or comparing against other children of the same age? ADHD is a developmental delay, so what is normal for a child of say 10 might be an ADHD marker by the age of 15. This is also why for example there will usually be a form to be completed by the child's teacher or an adult who knows them outside of the family context and has experience of other children this age.

That said these are screeners and should only be a first step - this is why professional input is necessary because not everyone will interpret a questionnaire in the same way. It only gives you a very general indication of probably ADHD/unlikely to be ADHD/could be ADHD.

Lastly be careful that you are looking at a legitimate screener and not something produced by a company that wants to sell you something.

Does your child do it more frequently than their peers? That's often an indicator that professional assessment would be helpful.

I am not as familiar with the ratings scales for children but for example for the adult one, only the first 10/11 questions are indicative for the screening result. The remaining 20 or so questions are discussion points for the assessing doctor.

Lastly one important criteria for diagnosis is whether there is impairment. Impairment is classed as the person having problems arising from their symptoms. If you have no problems, no disorder.

As an aside, people have ADHD, they aren't ADHD.

Those online tests are so inaccurate. The actual assessments are done by the consultant, parents and school, and are much, much more comprehensive. They took hours to complete. Very often the online ones seem to be on sites farming for data, which is why they require your email for the results. They are just trying to maximise traffic.

Having one child with ADHD and one without, the difference is start. My DC with ADHD struggles in so many aspects of life that just comes naturally to his sibling. There are far more difficulties than just being s bit hyper and not concentrating etc, more than I ever realised beforehand.

That should be stark, not start!

To pick up on what @BertieBotts said, when I had my child assessed in year 4 they gave her a tentative diagnosis but asked me to bring her back in year 6 to check for the maturity relevance (there were specific reasons for this). As I then had the benefit of comparing two school assessments taken 18 months apart, I could clearly see that things you might expect them to outgrow, had at best stayed the same, and some had got worse.

Important point to make

OK now I'm curious about which screeners you've filled in, because I'm not seeing anything on the ones I've looked up about tidying bedroom, or needing reminders to brush teeth? I think these ARE fairly normal parenting responsibilities.

There are some about homework being a struggle - but there are scales to this, ie most children don't love homework, but there's a difference between one who gets down to it, given a good routine, consistency and support and one who whatever you try is fighting it for hours with tears and silliness and so much drama compared to the actual difficulty or boredom of the task - that could be indicative of an issue. Check with the class teacher how long their homework task is expected to take - if you're finding that you have to consistently put over 2-3x this amount of time into homework then that could be an issue.

Also there are different aspects to homework - some children you have to perform miracles to get them to start, but once they're doing it they're OK and they will finish it fine. Some others will struggle to actually do the task that has been set, or will do it sloppily. Some will start but then need endless encouragement to keep going and actually finish. Some forget to bring their homework home every day or don't write down what they have to do so they don't know. Some forget to hand it back in, or hand it in without a name on.

The level of independence expected also varies by age as well. And again if a child is behind where they are expected to be, it could be indicative of a delay.

This. In reception my DS couldn’t concentrate on the mat but “it was his age” as I’m sure he wasn’t the only one. Fast forward to Y3 and he still calls out, gets up without asking. He probably is one of very few, or the only one. Comparison with peers is how I noticed both my DC are likely ND (DS in Y3 has a diagnosis).

I have ADHD and my schooling was a train wreck. It wasn't until I was an adult and could start to understand the workings of my body that I managed to engage with education. It was strangely easier working and doing night school than school had been. Luckily they allowed me to go straight in for A levels despite having failed all my O levels. It was a long time ago.

The trauma I carry from being an undiagnosed girl with ADHD destroyed my childhood. I was constantly told I was lazy, unproductive, daydreamer, uncoordinated, sensory challenged. But no one ever stopped to think why.

So no, all children do not have ADHD. Yes they may daydream sometimes, bounce a lot, forget routines, have an itchy skin day, they could have poor coordination but no, they probably don't have ADHD.

But please, please if they are presenting with the above and struggling to learn get them referred.

OP I found a reliable indicator is what the teacher thinks. Some DC do mask, but as my DS doesn’t, it was clear when he has consistently been the “naughty” one but yet who is a lovely boy with a huge heart etc…kind to peers but so easily upset, takes up a lot of the teacher’s time.

Off course not all children have adhd , my daughter eis properly diagnosed and I would assume is more to do with the frequency and consistency

Absolutely not. My kids school flagged some vague concerns about DD so I filled in the autism and adhd checklist things. Not a single indicator of ADHD for my child. DH has it so I know what it's like to be around someone who struggles to focus / hyper focuses, fidgets, struggles with small tasks etc. DD just has no traits whatsoever.

She always remembers to brush teeth, she doesn't necessarily want to tidy or do homework but she will do it.

Not everyone prefers people first language but point taken.

It's not about "people first", it doesn't work with the acronym. You can't be a disorder you can only have one. It doesn't have an ASD/Autistic equivalent.

You would know if they did have ADHD. It affects every aspect of their life and their family around them and you can spot it a mile off when they're around other kids- even from being an infant.

I just googled them.
The questions were like these -
How often does your child forget to do something that they do all the time and need constant reminding?
How often does your child avoid, dislike, or are reluctant to engage in tasks that require sustained mental effort or thought?
Ds needs reminding to brush his teeth every single time, he will just go to bed without doing it. He mostly needs reminding several times. He will also need to be reminded to do his homework, put his things away, charge the controllers for his game console etc.
DS is reluctant to do homework and homeschooling in covid was a nightmare. But he’s very clever and does okay at school. I think he under performs but he’s not failing. He gets in trouble a lot for fidgeting and not staying in his seat etc. but school won’t refer him for an assessment because he isn’t enough of an issue to them but he says he thinks he is and wants to know.

I think you’re taking my post a little too literally. I don’t mean they all have ADHD but that all kids would score on the checklists. I have never met a child who doesn’t need constant reminders to do every day things. Or who sit in a chair really well or who don’t fidget. Maybe they do exist but non of my friends kids are like that and would all score on one of these checklists.
I was wondering if maybe the kids I know are different from the norm.

All kids would score on the checklist; not all scores indicate ADHD.

When I say ‘score on the checklist’ I mean score enough to indicate ADHD

As someone with an ADHD diagnosis and a history of being medicated for it I'm of the opinion that ADHD behaviours in the diagnosed, the self diagnosed and even just the general population are a really just behaviours that are basically normal in humans. They might be exacerbated by modern technology or by past trauma, some people may have had the good fortune to develop or be taught good strategies that help them. A lot of people dislike this take but I am fairly certain that to be ADHD is normal, common and that we all are a bit like this and that those that are not are actually the "neuro-diverse" people.

People without an ADHD diagnosis, who don't meet the criteria for diagnosis also perform better on stimulant medication (except for in creative tasks where the evidence suggests they actually dampen creativity for everyone ADHD or not). Psychiatrists also state that coaching and teaching people with ADHD behaviours good planning and organisation skills as well as general healthy habits is just as effective as medication and more effective long term as there is no dependence on the medication, no need for increased doses and they don't suffer the same problems if medication is stopped or changes. They will also not suffer the potential health risks of long term stimulant use. I am not saying there is never a case for medication use but it's use shouldn't be first line or only treatment as it so often is. Let us not forget that this kind of stimulant medication has been sold to us for various reasons (nasal congestion, weight loss, depression) over the past century almost and has often then been withdrawn for its long term negative effects.

I know many people don't like this view and I know how validating a diagnosis can be when you feel like everyday life is a huge struggle but I also feel that a diagnosis should be a starting point, something you can use to learn about yourself and to move off from as opposed to labelling and medicating yourself in perpetuity.