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Original poster

Is it rude to leave a WhatsApp group chat?

26 replies

Wishfulthinkingmaybe1 · 18/09/2023 10:01

I was added to a group chat a couple of years ago, which I didn't really want to be in and haven't really benefitted from it. I only participate occasionally because I feel I should, but they're all more acquaintances than friends. I know you can mute etc., but I think I'd rather leave. The person who added me I know had good intentions, but I feel it's really not for me- there's more chats than actual physical meetups, which was the original intention. There's 16 people in it.

Would it seem rude to just exit the group?

OP posts:
BeverleyMacker · 18/09/2023 10:04

Just mute it 🙂

Sprig1 · 18/09/2023 10:06

Just leave. I would (and have).

Mrsjayy · 18/09/2023 10:11

Just leave it. If anyone asks either tell the truth or make up something or other it's fine.

SisterMichaelsHabit · 18/09/2023 10:17

I left a group chat once. Cue 2 years of various people asking me "have you sorted out your WhatsApp yet?" "Can I add you to the group?" "Why aren't you in the group?" "It's really easy to share things with people in the group" "Did someone upset you?" I think bastarding WhatsApp shouldn't tell everyone when you leave, it's not a bloody airport, I just wanted to go quietly! I ended up getting browbeaten into being added again.

These groups are like collections of names with no real purpose or substance to the conversation, usually shyte that only 3-4 people in the group participate in, and yet they NEED you there. Why? Maybe because they need an audience? I haven't worked out why they're always so desperate to keep me in these bloody groups where they never talk to me and ignore me when I ever post and literally quote the last person before me who posted to make it really clear they're not talking to me. They just seem to want validation of a captive audience of people too polite to leave.

PickoftheMix · 18/09/2023 10:22

I left a group once and as you say, it comes across as very dramatic as WhatsApp boldly announces "X left the group."

I left because I didn't see the point in being in a group where only a few people spoke and the rest just ignored. If I wrote something it would be ignored so what was the point? When I left though there was "Ooo I wonder why she left" etc 🙄 Better off out of it.

Ihaventgottimeforthis · 18/09/2023 10:23

Oh GOD why would you stay in an annoying, irrelevant whatsapp group chat with people you barely know just to be polite?! wtf.

Just leave!

StuffLoriThangs · 18/09/2023 10:26

Just leave.

there’s actually a setting in WhatsApp where you can make it so certain people can’t invite you to groups.

Pluviophile1 · 18/09/2023 10:30

I thought that it had changed and only the admins are notified when someone leaves a group? Either way, just leave the group. Make up some vague 'it wasn't for me' or 'I wasn't keeping up with messages' if you're asked. Soon enough, people will forget that you left.

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 18/09/2023 10:33

If you can be bothered, there's nothing stopping you putting a short sentence or two e.g. "Sorry, have been getting inundated with loads of WhatsApps on loads of groups, so I need to prioritise and just stay on a very few groups where I'm active, for my sanity! All the best - see you around." and then leave.

If they tend to ignore you, they won't see it anywhere; but it will be there in the background to 'cover' you, in case anybody questions your leaving or tries to add you back in. They might not even notice that you've gone anyway!

maresedotes · 18/09/2023 10:33

Only the Admin now gets informed when you leave.

I left one a few years ago and blamed it on having a new phone.

HeyYouWithTheSadFace · 18/09/2023 10:34

I leave them all the time! Nobody ever questions it.

TheChosenTwo · 18/09/2023 10:36

Do just leave. I’ve archived some and muted others, I do check in on them from time to time but some get really off topic!
If they’re totally irrelevant to your life now please leave, it’s not rude.
I’m in a book group and there’s someone who left it years ago but still in the group chat. Never messages but always reads, I find it weird! Wish she would just leave tbh!!

WhateverMate · 18/09/2023 10:37

Do you have children who are old enough to use social media?

If so, what would you say to them?

Of course it's fine to leave any SM group you want to. If you're asked why, just say you're having a cull.

Cowlover89 · 18/09/2023 10:38

Just leave

lilyblue5 · 18/09/2023 10:41

What’s app doesn’t notify anyone but admin when you leave these days.
so quit away!!! (I had a cleanse recently and feel GREAT)

Gothambutnotahamster · 18/09/2023 10:51

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 18/09/2023 10:33

If you can be bothered, there's nothing stopping you putting a short sentence or two e.g. "Sorry, have been getting inundated with loads of WhatsApps on loads of groups, so I need to prioritise and just stay on a very few groups where I'm active, for my sanity! All the best - see you around." and then leave.

If they tend to ignore you, they won't see it anywhere; but it will be there in the background to 'cover' you, in case anybody questions your leaving or tries to add you back in. They might not even notice that you've gone anyway!

This is good - I'd do that!

xogossipgirlxo · 18/09/2023 10:53

Just leave. I hate being added to these damn groups and I wish I could leave our family chat. My brother in law left because he doesn’t speak our language so didn’t understand conversations anyway. Lucky bastard.

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 18/09/2023 11:05

What’s app doesn’t notify anyone but admin when you leave these days.

That's good in one sense, but presumably everybody will see the list of names at the top and may notice your absence - and then try to add you back in!

lilyblue5 · 18/09/2023 11:08

True! :(

SwiftNameChange · 18/09/2023 11:08

I'd just leave

Itick8outof10boxes · 18/09/2023 11:15

I couldn't be arsed with any nonsense of explaining/making excuses it's just not my style. I've left, end off. If people think I'm rude for doing that, so what?

WhateverMate · 18/09/2023 13:30

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 18/09/2023 11:05

What’s app doesn’t notify anyone but admin when you leave these days.

That's good in one sense, but presumably everybody will see the list of names at the top and may notice your absence - and then try to add you back in!

Then you just don't accept 🤷‍♂️

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 18/09/2023 14:44

Then you just don't accept

I'm not the most accomplished at WhatsApp. Is there a setting whereby you can stop yourself being added? I had this the other week, when I tried to add two people to a group that I'm an admin for (they were right there in front of me and had asked to be added!). It let me add one of them straight away, but for the other one, I had to send her an 'invite' which is actually a verb, but never mind

lilyblue5 · 18/09/2023 16:11

Yes!
Open what’s app, go to settings, privacy, groups and then untick all the ones you don’t want 😉

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 18/09/2023 19:06

Ah, great - thanks a lot, lilyblue5.