Please help me sleep. 20 minutes last night/this morning and feel awful 😖

[GnTx3]

Hi,

Simply, I'm absolutely desperate. I don't have young kids, I don't work shifts. I just can't switch off.

I've tried magnesium, pillow sprays, nothing is working.

Please help.

It’s awful isn’t it, I’ve tried everything, spoke to GP last week who told me to do sleepio app, do you not think I’ve tried all these. I’m at breaking point! I’ve re started setraline this morning to see if that helps with the racing thoughts and anxiety. Seriously considering hypnosis, have had CBT on nhs and was a waste of everyone’s time

You must feel so sick.

What do you do when you can't sleep? Do you go on your phone? Is it a long-standing issue, and if so, what help have you had with it/what strategies have you tried?

Personally I find reading books in bed sends me straight to sleep.

Hey, try some ASMR, i personally love 'restful rambles' on youtube. Very relaxing

Do a 20-30 min walk jog in the day if you can. Avoid screens and caffeinated drinks after 7pm. Have a hot shower.

Add to this with a mug of camomile tea, (or simply just do the tea…)
Make a cup of loose leaf camomile tea. Make as normal tea (no milk). I often leave it go cold before drinking/removing the camomile. Makes me sleep fast, no after affects.
I find the loose leaf stronger than teabags.

Are you peri menopausal perhaps?

if after an hour you haven’t nodded off, get up. Go down stairs, make a night time tea, I like the tick tock brand from Waitrose. Drink it, do some 4/7/8 breathing (google it) go back to bed and try again.
before you go to bed though, no caffeine after 2pm, no screens after 7. Have a bath in Epsom salts and lavender. Read and hopefully nod off. I listen to night scape things too on a headband earphone. Make sure your room is dark, wear earplugs.

In the meantime meditation every day for 10 minutes, look at the headspace app, think there is a free trial. some exercise such as walking in the day as much as you are exhausted.
maybe try nytol if you haven’t already to try and break the habit.
it’s horrible, I have been there, mine turned out to be the menopause which in the main has been sorted with HRT but I still get bad nights when my brain just won’t switch off.

Go to bed as late as possible but get up at the same time every day. Fill your mind with pleasant simple thoughts. I think of a sailing ship where the wind gets up and I have to manage a storm. If I am interrupted in my thoughts I start at the beginning again often multiple times. Eventually my brain knows what is going to happen and I fall asleep.

Thank you for all your replies and recommendations so far.

I don't have caffeine after 10am usually, but am wondering if I should cut out altogether. Bloody love my coffee though!! One of my main problem seems to be ear worms. I can get a bit of a song in my head and it will just play on a loop over and over for hours. Yesterday it was most of the day as well, but as soon as I went to bed it was like it amplified and I just couldn't shift it.

I have very bad anxiety and often feel very dark at nighttime. Sometimes just thinking of all the worst case scenarios and convince myself they're all the most likely scenarios too.

I usually do drink camomile before bed, but not loose leaf, so maybe I'll give that a go.

I hear CBD drops can be good, but not sure if I want to go down that route or not.

On a less important note, I look awful when I'm not sleeping. My skin looks grey, my eyes and dark, hollow and baggy. It really gets me down, but the worst part is how it makes me feel and the worry about what it's doing to my health.

I probably am peri. I'm 39 with extremely heavy periods and an insane amount of anxiety, as I already mentioned, so I wouldn't be surprised.

I swear by taking an anti histamine, but it has to be citrizine, even the cheaper Lidl ones work they're about 79p!

I play brown noise on Spotify, luckily DH doesn’t mind, it works about 70% of the time. It gives my Brian something to focus on and I drop off

Brain!

Sounds like you need HRT patches.

Have you tried melatonin?

Sounds trite but the Get Sleepy app really helped me.
I was once put onto Zopiclone because I had gone 5 days without sleep due to trauma. The Zopiclone did put me out for 8 hours but I didn't feel any better for it.

@PeskyRooks I do do this occasionally, but has to be the one with the drowsy effect. Think you need to buy them over the counter now. I don't like the idea of taking those regularly though.

@AlanJohnsonsBeemer brown noise doesn't sound very nice 😬😂 I will look into that though, thanks.

@IhearyouClemFandango I heard wonderful things about that, but after doing some research heard that in the long run it can make things worse. I forget why now.

Anti histamine like night nurse, swimming, hypo therapy. CBT for sleep is a thing. Don't panic.

Michael Mosely did a programme on sleep and insomnia. Among the suggestions that I most remember was having a day time nap, even if only half an hour or so. Then you're not overtired when it comes to bedtime. I think after lunch but not after about 4pm.

Brown noise is great or drone music, something you can actually focus on & listen to to stop your brain from churning really works for me.

@Readingineading yes, I hear that a lot, regarding sleeping tablets. I just want to feel refreshed and not crap all the time. I can feel refreshed after 5 or 6 hours, but I suspect that's when it's proper quality sleep.

Melatonin imo doesn't make things worse. But if you find your body getting used to it then stop for few days.

I’ve tried all the stuff they recommend for good sleep hygiene but nothing worked at all. The only thing that actually worked is I followed a sleep routine based on increasing your sleep drive. It basically involves you having to get up. So I started getting up at 4am and doing ironing Reading or watching TV but actually turning all lights on and being up. Few days later I moved it to 5am. I swear after a week I was sleeping all the way through to 5am so eventually moved it to 7am.

However the past few months I’ve been waking again at midnight and feels like I’m tossing and turning all night. I think this comes off the back of school hols and me changing my sleep patterns staying up late getting up late etc. so I have restarted again today got up at 5am and got busy.

you will feel absolutely shattered to begin with but it does work (at least for me)

Melatonin works for me.

You poor thing. You mention the ear worms keeping you awake. This is the classic symptom of a tired, anxious brain. I read the wonderful "Self help for your nerves" book by Dr Claire Weeks. She talks about how when your brain is tired and anxious thoughts get stuck in your head and keep repeating over and over. I've really noticed that when I'm tired and stressed certain songs get stuck and keep me awake.
I think an antidepressant/antianxiety medication like seyraline might help to calm down your mind.
One other thought that came to me was are you getting enough exercise? I walk about 6 miles a day and am so physically tired when I go to bed that I sleep well. I've noticed a hive difference when I haven't exercised - I just can't sleep.

Check out the sleepy head programme

I found cutting out caffeine completely made a big difference. I used to have one cup of normal tea a day, but I had to completely flush it out of my system to have an impact. Also alcohol would destroy any chance of sleep, even if only half a glass.

If ear worms are an issue try distracting your brain. I play word games, one that usually works is:
•think of a word, any word. Like "Monkey"
•for each letter of the word, you havento think of as many words as possible beginning with that letter, and younhave to visualise the item you are thinking of. So 'M' from monkey becomes - money, magic, magician, marijuana, malicious etc etc.
• if you duplicate a word or can't think of any more move onto the next letter (so "O")
Etc etc
I usually find I've dropped off by midway through the word.

Get treatment for your anxiety and tonight take a nytol. Sertraline helped me sleep again.