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Original poster

4am wake ups!

19 replies

Dyinforaliein · 16/09/2023 05:23

My 20 month old has started waking up at 4am every morning. She is unconsolable until we lift her from the cot. We've tried putting her down later and giving her a big, filling supper before bed but nothing makes any difference. She just wakes at 4 no matter what!

We would be happy if she woke at 5 as we need to get up at 6 for work anyway. Any tips to just hold her off for another hour, that don't involve pushing her bedtime back, as that did not work.

Thanks!

Edited for typo

OP posts:
plehpleh · 16/09/2023 05:34

Our (now 20mo) went through this a few months ago. Would wake at 4am. We increased daytime naps because she was waking early from over tiredness and it worked. Makes zero sense to adult sleep logic but it worked!

littlelizzard · 16/09/2023 05:45

also in the thick of it with my just turned 2 year old, except he's now in a bed so just jumps at me when he thinks it's time to get up! (It isn't) I don't have any tips but I do believe this is some sort or regression, although it doesn't feel like it when they sleep through the night! We've been through this before and it lasted a good few weeks before it stopped. But early mornings are a killer so right with you there

Original poster
Dyinforaliein · 16/09/2023 05:49

That's both. I'm wondering is it developmental as she seems to have matured a lot lately, and has started a new nursery which have different nap routines. Maybe it's just a phase and we need to hang tight!

OP posts:

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Original poster
Dyinforaliein · 16/09/2023 05:49

Inconsolable! Just realised I tried to invent a new word in my OP. Tiredness!

OP posts:
Original poster
Dyinforaliein · 16/09/2023 05:50

Also, thanks, not that's.

OP posts:
Toddler101 · 16/09/2023 05:52

Try earlier bedtime instead of later!

SoSad44 · 16/09/2023 05:52

Sorry we had the same at around the same age. We put him down with us and tried to keep everything calm, dark and quiet (and I kept saying it’s sleeping time etc). We have now moved to wakings between 5 and 6 and I hope one day we will be at 6am. Fingers crossed for you, I think it’s just a phase 😬🫣

Original poster
Dyinforaliein · 16/09/2023 05:53

Toddler101 · 16/09/2023 05:52

Try earlier bedtime instead of later!

Oh interesting! This would be 6pm though!

OP posts:
Youngman1267 · 16/09/2023 05:53

Nothing we did made any difference. In the end we just rode it out. I remember him waking at 3.50am once- ridiculous!

Ostryga · 16/09/2023 05:55

Yeah I tried everything and Dd just had to move onto a different phase!

I used to bring her into bed with me and give her my phone (if you have an iPhone can lock the screen so it stays on but they can’t exit out or touch anything) and she watched baby YouTube. And I would go back to sleep for an hour!

Original poster
Dyinforaliein · 16/09/2023 05:55

SoSad44 · 16/09/2023 05:52

Sorry we had the same at around the same age. We put him down with us and tried to keep everything calm, dark and quiet (and I kept saying it’s sleeping time etc). We have now moved to wakings between 5 and 6 and I hope one day we will be at 6am. Fingers crossed for you, I think it’s just a phase 😬🫣

We try to lie beside her in the cot in the dark and soothe her back to sleep but she roars like a wild animal. She gets so upset we just lift her as our other kids wake up and we worry about the neighbours complaining! 😄

OP posts:
Original poster
Dyinforaliein · 16/09/2023 05:56

Ostryga · 16/09/2023 05:55

Yeah I tried everything and Dd just had to move onto a different phase!

I used to bring her into bed with me and give her my phone (if you have an iPhone can lock the screen so it stays on but they can’t exit out or touch anything) and she watched baby YouTube. And I would go back to sleep for an hour!

I've been bringing her into the living room and putting the TV on while I doze!

OP posts:
PurBal · 16/09/2023 05:59

I think it’s probably just a phase.
Does she have anything else n her cot to play with if she wakes? Eg books or soft toys? Might help you get an extra 30 minutes sleep if she has a distraction.
We moved DS into a bed at 21 months and it made a world of difference, sounds silly but I think he was craving control and independence. There were a couple of nights where he’d get out and want us and we’d have to put him back but generally just because he can get out doesn’t mean he does (or if he does it’s to get a toy and then he gets back into bed). ETA for clarity, for some reason this meant he stopped crying until we came to get him which is why I’m suggesting it! (Also tired sorry).

Original poster
Dyinforaliein · 16/09/2023 06:19

PurBal · 16/09/2023 05:59

I think it’s probably just a phase.
Does she have anything else n her cot to play with if she wakes? Eg books or soft toys? Might help you get an extra 30 minutes sleep if she has a distraction.
We moved DS into a bed at 21 months and it made a world of difference, sounds silly but I think he was craving control and independence. There were a couple of nights where he’d get out and want us and we’d have to put him back but generally just because he can get out doesn’t mean he does (or if he does it’s to get a toy and then he gets back into bed). ETA for clarity, for some reason this meant he stopped crying until we came to get him which is why I’m suggesting it! (Also tired sorry).

Edited

Some teddies but when she is angry she starts flinging everything out! The pillow and blanket get chucked in a rage too! She has even started trying to take the fitted sheet off the mattress in rage!

In saying that, she is quite a babyish 20 month old and isn't ready for a bed yet. I have visions of her toddling around the house during the night, lickng the toilet brush and eating out of the food bin 😄

OP posts:
Ostryga · 16/09/2023 06:35

Oh yeah Dd was in her cot for a long time, it was easier than waking up to whatever chaos she would have done if she was in a bed 😂

20 months is a tough time because they’re on the cusp of understanding but not quite there. If this carries on as she gets bigger, a Gro Clock will save your sanity! But think she’s a bit little atm.

Would warm milk in bed in a leakproof sippy cup put her back to sleep do you think? That would sometimes placate Dd.

timesogin · 16/09/2023 06:41

Both of mine have done this over the years - often when the weather starts to change. It's the time of night when the temperature often dips - someone told me.
I now put them in warmer pyjamas /add a blanket/vest etc (whatever's appropriate for the time of year) the following night and it seems to do the trick

Original poster
Dyinforaliein · 16/09/2023 06:42

Would warm milk in bed in a leakproof sippy cup put her back to sleep do you think? That would sometimes placate Dd.

It gets thrown back at us!

OP posts:
Texttotext · 16/09/2023 06:49

Been there twice with both my Dcs, Op!
It's tough!! I never found a solution that worked for Us but it does get easier eventually Confused

Covetthee · 16/09/2023 06:49

My eldest did this too. It was exhausting to have your day start at 4:30am. We tried everything and nothing worked. It sucked but the only thing i could do was go to bed earlier to get rest

oddly the clock change (in Winter) seemed to reset her sleep or it could have just been a phase that ran its course but we were happy to not have our day start super early anymore.

Hate to say it but she is still an early waker but not 4:30 early 🤣and we’re used to that now

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