Good 4th birthday party for 40 children?

[UniKnow]

Thinking about to DD’s 4th birthday. Once I’ve invited the children of families we’re friends with plus a few from her nursery and pre school it’s looking like over 40 children. I’m
aware how mad this sounds but not sure how we can cull it unless I say no siblings (there are several in the 18-24m group, including us) but I like to be hospitable. This feels way too many for hall plus bouncy castle. Leisure Centres have a max of 30. We did soft play last year. I realise not all will come but last year we invited 25 and only 2 declined.

DD recently went to a Princess party where they had a Cinderella character and loved it so that would be great. But several of the children at that party weren’t fussed by her and so just ran around with nothing else to do so not sure how to entertain them? I’d need two princesses for that many children.

I could book a leisure centre (soft play, climbing frame set up) for 4 hours rather than 2 hours and make it drop-in. Anytime within that window rather than a fixed period. Would that work?

Any other ideas for large numbers gratefully received. I want it to be as easy as possible and budget of around £400. Thanks!

I was going to suggest this - if you really feel like you want to celebrate with different groups of friends, do the bouncy castle (or whatever you decide) party with one and then something else (just tea and games at home?) with the others.

Thanks everyone. I don’t think I can face two parties or anything at home. I’m leaning towards no siblings given everyone seems to think that’s socially acceptable. That would be 25-ish and perhaps fewer as some wouldn’t come as they don’t have childcare. Do you just write on the invites ‘Sorry we’re not able to include siblings’ or similar?

The 4 hour drop in is a bad idea. How will your DD keep going for 4 hours? The last 2 hours will be hell and almost people will come for the start anyway.

6 friends round for games and cake at home is plenty- you can make it really special and have a princess entertainer, lovely decorations etc if you like, or keep it simple. Or if you must do a whole class thing, don’t invite the friends from out of school and have them round separately. But smaller is better and makes it more likely your DD will actually enjoy it. How would it benefit her to have 40, it just sounds stressful?

Church hall. Good entertainer. We had a fair few with 50+ kids (I know, I know) but the entertainer was brilliant so all I had to do was sort out food, cake and party bags. (If you're near Manchester I can recommend him!)

4 hour drop in is crazy, you and DD will be wrecked. It's a long time to entertain kids.

A hall party is the way to go. Get a bouncy castle, prepare a buffet and have some toys scattered around. Themed decorations to make the hall pretty and the birthday child happy. Specify two hours.
We did this type of party a few times and it always went down well.

No such thing, crazy idea.

Echoing that a 4 hour long party on a drop-in basis would be mad, your 4 year old would not be able to sustain having their party last that long. And being responsible for hosting a 4 hour long party for pre-school age children sounds exhausting.

You need a church hall type place with a fairly decent kitchen to help sorting out food and drinks, a team of other adults to help with the food and clearing up and the best party entertainer you can find, they are worth their weight in gold.

I would seat the non invited sibling children separately to the party kids to eat and their parents can sort them out.
It can be done but needs military level planning and execution.

Is it just girls?
I don't want to sound sexist (aware that I do of course) but my DS would have hated a princess party. So if you announced a princess party, this would naturally cut numbers as not everyone would fancy that.

We had a party with over 60 kids in February. We hired a function room (with a bar!) and an entertainer and did brown bag picnics for the party tea. This was a joint party amalgamating two classes though - I wouldn't have done it on my own.

Just to warn you op I had half that amount of kids and let's just say it was full on!

Thanks everyone. Drop in idea duly ditched! I think I’ll go with no siblings which will cut numbers to a manageable 20-25 and hire a babysitter for our own DS so it doesn’t look like double standards.

Good point about the gender. It’s about 75% girls and I did think about how it wouldn’t be as appealing to boys but I think I have to go with my DD would like and if they choose not to come then fair enough. Is that reasonable?

I would have your own DS there he's an exception surely.

Have you hosted a children's party before? You need an army of people helping out, as a single parent I've hosted a couple of times alone and its difficult, especially cutting up the cake. I learnt in later years to have separate cupcakes, or a party cake precut up and in party bags, or the mini Colin caterpillar cakes from M&S

Having your own DS there is absolutely fine!

We did a party for this many at age 4. It was a lot, but we did it in a church hall with a bouncy castle, and then some play stuff out, it was my mum's church so we borrowed all the toddler group stuff! And yeh it basically ran like a toddler group! Craft table, train set etc. Kids played, parents stayed, we didn't have a set time to sit and eat, just a help yourself whenever buffet. The only time we got all the kids together was to do Happy Birthday and blowing out candles.

It was mayhem but actually really fun.

I’ve hosted lots of parties and events so know how to make food, etc as easy as possible. But I’ve never hosted a kids party and so the entertainment side is new to me. Im
grateful for the ideas and opinions as I just want to get it right. Last years was one where we could just turn up so it was easier.

@UniKnow 4 year olds don't really need much to be entertained (as long as you don't have 40 of them....).
As I said upthread a few classic games - pass the parcel, musical statues - this always seems popular because they like to dance at that age. You can vary musical statues to having a game that when the music stops you call out something like "pose like a tree". That would get a lot of giggles. If you have outside space chasing some bubbles around is always popular.
If you want them to chill for a bit get them make bracelets with beads.
Don't invite more than 4 or 5. Don't have the party for more than 2 hours.

40 kids would only work if it was hiring out an entire soft play centre I think. 40 or even 30 kids going between a few bouncy castles in a sports hall might even be too much as there just won’t be space on things for them to enjoy it.

4 hours absolutely not , please do not do that to yourself! Hosting a 2 hour party feels like it’s about 6 hours as it is! How would you time doing the birthday cake as well , it just honestly wouldn’t work.

I always did the party bit first for about 90 mins , then food, then cake and finally start the party bags about 5-10 minutes before the end, to signal the party was finished, as some people are in no rush to leave and it’s awkward if you are renting somewhere with a time slot.

even 2 hours might be too long you can get away with an hour and a half all in for 4 year olds.

you can take your own children!! No one expects them to be counted as “no siblings”.

We had a similar amount of kids for DS 5th and we did a hall and bouncy castle, pizza party (from Tesco) for food. I put out a picnic blanket with duplo and cars on but it was a great party. I recommend making or buying individual cakes that are all the same and bubble wands if you care about party bags/favours - good luck!

For 40 children you are going to have a good number of adults supervising them and more so if your in a hall as you would not want any children escaping out onto main roads and such like.

Basically from experience, young children often get totally overwhelmed at parties at that age. If they are pre-school, they often don’t have the attention to follow instructions for a long period of time so entertainers don’t always hold their attention until they are 5/6. In general, I think the easiest ones for that age are softplay or a play type venue where you can do exclusive hire and make sure there are parents there supervising and not doing a drop and go.

I went to a really lovely hall party for a 4yo which was all girls, lots of stations like decorating stuff, colouring and a bouncy castle and they were all so calm and civilised. It was the nicest party I’ve ever been to as a parent. The worst one I went to (for the age group) was a massive disco party for a 4yo party. There were so many tears and it was all just a bit much as the music was v loud, there were mixed ages and the little ones couldn’t follow the entertainer.

Toddler sensory party! 100% recommend

It sounds like a nightmare! You may need several of the parents to help. Most parents of that age stay as well but if they don't you might be responsible for other children as well as organising games etc which is very difficult. I've found best way is to have a written plan of events and enlist family and give them specific jobs.

With that many at that age, exclusive hire of a soft play is surely the only way to go.