Waitrose age ID check is bugging me

[Mothership4two]

I was is a smallish busy Waitrose (not my usual shop) with DS (25) and I bought 6 bottles of (not cheap) wine, a box of chocolates and a handful of day to day food items. At the till I put the items on the belt and bagged them while DS stood waiting by the end. The cashier didn't put the wine through and asked my son for ID. I was a bit confused and told her that this was MY shopping (I'm in my 50s and sadly do not need ID). She ignored me and asked for his ID again. When I repeated it was my shopping she said it was company policy - other than that she was pretty uncommunicative. So DS went out to the car to fetch his ID and there was a bit of grumbling from the couple waiting behind who then went off to find another till. DS came back and she put it through without a word.

I wasn't grumpy with her, I was just neutral, paid and left. It was irritating but we weren't particularly outraged and had a laugh about it in the car. DS said he hasn't been asked for ID in years (he looks his age) and that no "youngster" would be spending £70+ on wine for a party. We thought it was odd though.

I know there are much bigger things going on in the World to worry about, but it has bugged me since then. I know the cashier isn't a mindreader but it was pretty obvious it was my shopping and very obvious that DS is an adult. And also what happens if you go around with your 16 year old child or younger and happen to buy alcohol, would Waitrose then refuse to let you buy it? I'm sure that happens in supermarkets up and down the country all the time - buying alcohol when parents are shopping with their children. I understand that supermarkets have to have a policy for not selling alcohol to childen via others but it was patently obvious that was not happening. The whole thing doesn't make sense.

AIBU and has anyone else been put in a similar postion?

So do they ask babies for ID? Or small children? I mean where’s the cut off? What if you’ve got your kids with you and want to buy wine? It’s a stupid policy. In theory no parent would be allowed to buy alcohol ever if shopping with their underage kids. If it’s the law then it should be applied to all ‘minors’. If it’s not applied equally and consistently then it’s policy and not the law.

I do take a common sense approach. I don't work in a supermarket, but the place I do work does have lots of challenge 25 products including things like energy drinks (which are challenge 25) dermaplaning tools and medications. You'd be surprised how many kids try to buy paracetamol or razors etc then come back with their parents or older siblings and still come to the till with them after we've just refused the sale.

With respect, and I think you and me agree here in general, the policy can't be applied consistently as the whole point is to identify a potential proxy sale. Discriminate has obviously become a loaded term, but shop staff do need to discriminate between situations involving a woman buying wine with her groceries, and an adult with 5-6 potentially underage kids in toe dressed up for a party, and she's buying smirnoff ice and crisps.

Well thats an obvious situation to check IDs because of a potential proxy sale. The situation OP describes is not, the chances are vanishingly small.

I work in a supermarket because of my situation, I need my job too.
it’s amazing how quickly you get used to the arseholes 😂
I had one recently, a couple of girls walked towards the till (well I was on self
checkout) and I saw one girl hand the other a monster to buy for her. She was SO rude, said she was holding it for her friend because her hands were full, completely untrue.
I am not risking my job over a gobby teenager

100% not true

That’s a situation where you had seen something happen to raise a suspicion, and it was right for you to take an additional step.

it is not remotely comparable to an adult with a trolley full of shopping including alcohol who just happens to be with someone who is/looks under age.

In the absence of any other evidence at all it would be unreasonable and unjustified to take the view that that person might be trying to break the law.

It happened to me years ago when I was in a supermarket with my younger brother. He was underage at the time but I wasn’t buying it for him, he was just with me. They said I couldn’t purchase it because I might be buying it for him… If I was stupid enough to buy someone underage alcohol, I wouldn’t take them in the shop with me to choose!

I agree, it’s a very grey area for staff as we are told to use our judgment if we think a proxy purchase is happening so many people will ask for ID, because, as many people have already said, it isn’t worth our job not to

I find it really annoying and send my kids away if I'm buying alcohol as they they are both underage teens. It's not even illegal for them to drink alcohol that alcohol at home since they are well over 5 (the legal age to give alcohol to a child at home) surely if an adult was buying alcohol for someone underage they wouldn't go into the shop and go to the till together anyway so walking around the shop together and then sending them away would be more suspicious?
I've also had them refuse to sell me painkillers because I had allowed my child to scan them on the self scan (didn't even think about it since I was the one actually buying them and they usually scanned everything for me)
The worst was when I was refused a purchase of pain killers in superdrug because I was talking to the person in front of me in the queue and they also purchased painkillers, but I could then go to the pharmacy in the same shop and buy a massive box of them.

I got ID'd buying an alcoholic Christmas present in a department store that no longer exists when I was 46 wearing no makeup.
I did not have my driving licence, so I offered to show them my grey hair.
We had a bit of a standoff until a supervisor who obviously had been to specs@vers intervened and said I looked old enough to make the purchase.
That was 11 years ago, and I am still chuffed they thought I was so young.

I only learned from reading MN that buying alcohol with a teen present means you won’t get served. I was shocked but it’s policy. If the child looks old enough to be a teen possibly being allowed to drink then it’s a no. With younger children they don’t seem to ask. I don’t drink. I’ve bought alcohol when my dad was alive and I was doing his shopping but not sure I ever had the kids with me. If I did it was possibly the younger one who would have been under 10 at the time.

I did get screamed at once when I was buying something she restricted at self serve, got verified for my age, and then put it through the till, got receipt then my 10 year old popped her own sweets through herself using her own card. The woman screamed ‘you can’t do that it’s illegal!!’ As the whole shop looked at me I nearly died with embarrassment and asked my my 10 year old buying chocolate was illegal. It turned out she hadn’t seen me complete my purchase and thought I was allowing my 10 year old to tap my card at the till for the age restricted item. So whilst she apologised I then learned that it is illegal to allow your underage child to hold your card and tap it at the card reader for age restricted products. So for all parents who let their kids hand over money, or two the card reader, make sure there’s no age restricted products.

Oh and also, my 13 year old was refused to be served buying a pack of false nails as a gift on home bargains. She was a bit confused but apparently they are age restricted due to the glue on them. She was buying for a secret Santa gift so had to leave them and just pay for the other bits she bought.

I remember my mum had a blazing row in an Iceland when she was trying to buy alcohol for herself when I was a young teen. She was buying a spirit. The manager allowed her in the end but from then onwards I had to go elsewhere if she was buying any alcohol to avoid. This was generally whilst doing a clearly obvious family shop.

I was asked for ID at age 38 in Waitrose- just getting my Baileys for Xmas. 🫣

Child has since aged me considerably so unlikely to happen again but being single mum, does this mean I can never buy a bottle of wine again? I have to have my child with me.

My 47 year old hairdresser was asked for id ok shes petite and could pass for late 30s maybe but not a teenager.

I was in a supermarket a while ago and woman in front of me bought wine cashier asked for id woman was in early 30s she definitely wasnt a teenager no id young cashier wouldnt sell it to her she just left all shopping. He said to me i have to be careful.i said she defintely wasnt a teenager 30 plus definitely. You can tell someone under 18 well i can.

I think they do checks if someone doesn’t look 25 now, even if you can buy things under than that! I had it the other week when I got paracetamol!! (I’m well over the age for having them) I just laughed when they asked for ID, and that was that!! But years ago when I was pregnant I was 27 at the time, hubby bought beer with our shopping and they wanted to see my ID, I was annoyed and said I’m quite clearly pregnant and not going to drink!!! I think some people can’t use their own initiative and being overly cautious, I know it’s irritating though.

I sent my 19 year old outside the other day when I was buying booze as he didn’t have his id on him and I knew he’d be asked.

Im 29 and still get asked for ID most places it’s ridiculous. Never get asked when I have my kids with me though, maybe they feel sorry for me with two youngsters 🤣

It’s challenge 25:
https://wsta.co.uk/challenge-25/?amp

Not read all comments. But as a recently ex partner. It I'd quite definitely NOT company policy! If he'd been with a group of friends then yes, challenge 25 applies. However when parents shop with children common sense should be applied. Personally I'd make a complaint! She needs a refresher! And I say that as someone that worked for the partnership for over 17 years.

I've had this several times when at shops with my sisters. They wouldn't serve me in case I was actually buying for a minor.

Was asked for ID ones for a pack of 4 champagne truffles. A apart of a lever shop. I had a bay and 2 children in school uniform with me. You know can’t leave them home alone to shop. I was early 30s I do look young for my age but it would have to have been 10 when I had my oldest by her logic. And she was a tiny carbon copy of me at that age. Also pretty sure chocolates like truffles don’t even require ID, why the till flagged it no idea.

but by the accompanied by a minor policy, you also couldn’t buy Deodorants, Athletes foot spray or other treatments and medications, mouth wash. Energy drinks, a lighter/matches or cutlery. Etc etc.

Also technically this is a wrong as you can buy a a much booze as you like for under 18s in your own home it is perfectly legal for them to drink it or from 16? In pubs with a meal.