Surprised by GP's advice re perimenopause?

[periperisaucemama]

I spoke to a GP (Dr A) a few weeks ago about my possible peri symptoms (I'm 44). For context, my symptoms have been a complete loss of any libido, poor sleep, anxiety, bouts of low depression, utter lack of motivation, brain fog, low energy and lethargy, night sweats, joint aches. She advised me to take blood tests to rule out any other issues like thyroid, then asked me to see her again to take next steps and in her words "see what we can do to help you feel better".

I took blood tests, and then booked another GP appt with Dr A for today to go through the results and discuss what to do next. This morning, due to a mix up with the practice, I was given a different GP (Dr B) instead. She went through my results which were nothing of concern and then asked me to list my symptoms again (which I had previously discussed with Dr A). Her responses were a vague "yes things do get harder as you get older" and "having children does make you feel tired", and in reference to night sweats "it has been hot recently".

At one point it felt like she was trying to end the appointment there so I asked, "ok so what do you advise Dr?", and she just said "keep trying to stay fit and hope you feel better".

What would I need to say before any practical support or advice was offered? AIBU? Has anyone else had this experience?

Looking ahead, I've booked a private specialist appointment and am fortunate I can afford to do so.

Ask if your practice has a GP with menopause as a special interest. Ask to see them.

Ask to see a different GP.
I went at 45 and was prescribed HRT (I was actually offered HRT or antidepressants, with a chat about each and discussion around best plan to take, with follow up appointments after starting HRT).

Has anyone else had this experience? - Yep, every woman throughout time until very, very recently. Still a majority, I'd imagine. Hope you get better service with Dr A.

I would have said I think all these symptoms which are very difficult to live with, are likely related to perimenopause and thus I'd like to try HRT. She may not have known that's wherr you were going, maybe thought you were worried something else was afoot which the tests presumably ruled out.

I have visited four GP so far and been fobbed off

GP’s primarily work in prescribing drugs or some form of medical assistance (say if there had been low iron showing up on your blood tests they would suggest taking iron supplements, is their other services attached to the surgery to be referred to? What sort of help are you looking for?

Pretty much what I got. Plus the sympathetic head tilt and an offer of anti-depressants.

That’s a shit response from Dr B, and about 20 years out of date. There is so much evidence these days that early interventions can protect against longer term problems such as osteoporosis and dementia.
Can you ask for a follow up appointment with DrA? And if refused, I suggest you talk to the practice manager and explain that you were expecting help, not platitudes.

See a different GP and ask to see someone with whom you can discuss menopause symptoms.
I had the same runaround years ago and eventually found a GP that actually listened and prescribed HRT to help with symptoms.
Some GPs it seems are not really sympathetic to menopausal ladies.

I said that at the outset. It was the whole premise of the appointment and I explained how I'd already spoken to Dr A about peri and what she's advised, etc.

Thank you. My GP practice offers you the chance to choose the GP you'd like to have for each appointment and provides their bio. I chose Dr A because her bio said she had specialised in women's health and meno.

Dr B was allocated to me after a mix up, and despite her evidently being a 50+ something woman she clearly didn't have a clue!

I'm going to try the private appointment this week as my next step (it's with the Newson clinic) and then for any further subsequent GP appointments in future always try to choose Dr A!

But how is that helpful? Treating individual symptoms but not looking at the circumstances holistically?

GP here. I agree that’s not ideal and not what I would have done. I too would suggest seeing someone else to talk about it again - if it were me I’d probably spend a while discussing the possibilities of menopause or depression and the options of doing nothing and monitoring, antidepressants / other treatment for depression (women in their 40s still get depressed and important to remember this) or HRT (depending on what happened in the consultation).
good luck and take care.

im not suggesting it’s helpful, GP surgeries sometimes have teams attached which may be helpful, what type of help are you looking for?

First GP I saw, admitted she knew nothing about menopause was happy to prescribe HRT. The particular type didn’t suit me so I asked to change make. She did that then upped the dose when I was still having trouble.
I ended up seeing a different doctor after six weeks of feeling like shit.
She wanted to give me antidepressants. I refused, swapped to a lower dose then stopped completely.
It took me another couple of years before I would try HRT again, but this time I’d done some research on what was available.
There was an advanced nursing practitioner who had an interest in menopause. She listened and gave me what I was hoping for. I’ve not needed to change anything in the 18 months I’ve been back on it.
It’s not a silver bullet but it’s a hell of a lot better.
Contact the surgery, get an appointment, phone or in person, explain what you’re wanting. If you still don’t receive HRT and there’s no medical reason not to, try privately but I’d give the GP another go. Good luck

My GP and male gyno dont believe in perimenopause, aparently its my weight!!!!!
Sometimes even medical professionals can be lacking in knowledge and understanding.

GP's are absolutely useless when it comes to peri-menopause and menopause. It's a complete disgrace that the NHS treats women like this.

I went to my GP with possible peri symptoms and they said I should get tested for STIs 😕 (not impossible I know, but I'm in a very long relationship so the chances are low)

This is what stops me from going, I have all of the symptoms you mentioned but my periods are still regular as clockwork so I don’t think it counts as perimenopause- I’m 44.

I really don’t want to take antidepressants but I’m just not myself and I cry every day and feel anxious about things I never would have before, and have no self confidence or self esteem anymore.

What Exasperatednow said. I was fobbed off countless times having symptoms from 38 but still having my periods. By complete chance I got an appointment with a GP at our practice that specialises in menopause (she helps out occasionally) and she immediately said that it was early menopause and popped me on HRT. Turns out with my history it is very common to hit menopause early and she simply couldn't understand why the connection wasn't picked up earlier 🙄

im in my mid 40’s going through same symptoms as you, I started taking a strong vitamin complex special for women 45+ and it’s made a massive difference.

Would you mind sharing which one please?

@bluestar5 how did hrt help? I’m 44 so dr wanting to prescribe to me so I’m doing some reading about it and appointment this week.

I has an almost identical situation to you, same age and symptoms, and my GP was luckily like your first doctor. I started on HRT and it's helped tremendously. I'd ask to see that GP, or as others have suggested, a menopause specialist.

Hope you get sorted OP.

I had this experience which meant I could just write off my forties. I ended up in a terrible place mentally. I had no idea I was going through peri.
I eventually got put on HRT when I turned 50.
It's taken a long time to feel better than I did.