Funny sayings/things in your household

[Soubriquet]

If someone asks for the time, and it’s 9.50/21.50 it’s customary to say “it’s cowboy time” cos it’s..ten to ten

@sueelleker that's the one. The story was called Casting the runes and was much creepier than the film.

Me and my friend do this as well 😂😂

@LtdEdition01 we even have it on video a very cute little DD3 telling us she went to big testicles today 🤣 she’s 15 now and finds us very unfunny when we say we are just going to testicles for a loaf of bread!

Whenever any of us mentions that we don't have something, it's necessary to declare sadly 'I don't got a womble' in honour of our trembling lipped four year old niece paging through an Argos toy catalogue years ago.
All men in the family follow Billy Connolly's advice when alone in the kitchen in any house by wearing the tea cosy as a hat.
Again on Billy C front, there are few adverse events / experiences short of death that aren't lightened by a YouTube clip of Billy C performing the ' In the Brownies' song.

“We’re jamming’” bob marley style whenever we are making jam or preparing food with jam on

Only occasionally in my life I've been able to use the words "I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure." But it was immensely satisfying every time.

I don't get it...

Haha i should have rtft!

If someone has left a plate on the side, shoes in the way etc and we ask who did x - the answer in a southern drawl is ‘the dawg did it’ also ‘watch, learn, don’t eat my cookie’

Our tv quotes originate from TBBT and The Us Office. If any of us say something that could be viewed as risque we say, "That's what she said"!

Two close relatives when hearing the phone ring burst into the beginning of hanging on the telephone ("I'm in the phone box"...by Blondie) promptly followed by oh no wrong one. No idea how it became a thing but makes us laugh 😂 Also using the verb to make a wee i.e. I'll just make a wee and then we can go. Clearly not meant literally making wee but always makes people chuckle, I think I get it from my mum who got it from her mum as she is Dutch although speaks fluent English and has lived here for decades but one of those quirks.

If anyone says 'I like (something)' in this house, my husband will reply 'but I couldn't eat a whole one'. So ... 'I really like The Eiffel Tower' ... 'But I couldn't eat a whole one'.

Likewise 'I can (something)' is often met with 'well you've got to have a hobby'. So ... 'I can smell cheese' ... 'Well you've got to have a hobby'.

I would call them Dad gags but he's always said them :)

We often visit the area around Hadrian’s Wall where there are lots of Roman roads and I got into the habit of saying “this is a Roman road” any time that we got onto a straight road in that area - only now, anywhere when we are in the countryside and on a straight road I will say it.

Corners are explained by “that was where the Anglo Saxons built round a puddle”.
Bends at the brow of a hill “they realised they were going in the wrong direction”

No one could leave our house when I was growing up without my dad saying "and hey, let's be careful out there" from Hill Street Blues. It was mentioned in his eulogy recently and there was much hilarity in the church and we realised he must have said it to pretty much every person he'd ever taken his leave of.

When somebody mentions a friend .... ooh football/Holiday/college friend

Inbetweeners

What's for tea?

Shit with sugar on .... pretty sure this is a northern thing 🤣

No I don't either

The ten to ten thing is from the theme from a programme calied The Lone Ranger which was a cowboy show. People sing ten to ten to the theme tune.

Whoa there Leslie! From Harry Enfield, and also “Maureen! It’s getting a bit busy down here, my love!”

”Ah, go on, go on, go on….” In the style of Mrs Doyle.

”Go on Ted, he’ll love it.”

And if we say anything which is included in a song lyric, we then have to sing that lyric.

We do that too 😁.

If someone says they have a bad head the response is ALWAYS "that's a big head to be bad!"

If a light is left on "were you born in a barn?" (it was once said in error and now it's stuck!)

If it's raining we talk to the washing as we bring it in ala Peter Kaye "it's spitting, everybody inside it's spitting!"

Whenever someone shuts the car boot and others are nearby, we say "heads".
Someone always replies with "shoulders, knees and toes"

Makes me smile every time .

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

We call hiccoughs hickychuffs
.
I can't think of any others,we must be so boring

Oh god. I’m lincolnshire (so southern) and my grandparents used to say this to me all the time.

Also, “where’s mum” “ran away with a black man”

Yes, I know it’s racist but that is what they said. Every single time.