Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Sons wedding

16 replies

Bubbs001 · 07/09/2023 17:16

my son is getting married his partner doesn’t like me or his dad am I being unreasonable for being angry with him that they are going to Gretna to get married without anyone there except his son my grandson yet he wants us. All to go out for a meal the following week to celebrate I’m torn don’t know what to do I’ve always been there for him but just feel if I’m not good enough to go to his wedding why would I want to go a week after to celebrate it

OP posts:
Trenchfootinthescottishhighlandstoday · 07/09/2023 17:18

You go and smile sweetly or lose your ds and dgc....

WtfHormones · 07/09/2023 17:19

Well if you don't go then you are cutting your nose off to spite your face.

They are not obliged to invite you. If you want to be in their lives then you need to accept their wishes.

Why doesn't their partner not like you?

Original poster
Bubbs001 · 07/09/2023 17:20

Think we are a bit to common for her

OP posts:
FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 07/09/2023 17:22

It's his wedding. I didn't have anyone at mine, either.

You'll just alienate yourself entirely if you complain so just go along with it.

Runnerduck34 · 07/09/2023 17:25

I would be very disappointed not to go to my sons wedding but as its just the 3 of them and no other guests Id suck it and defintely go for the meal.
Its a shame your relationship with his soon to be wife isnt good. Is there anyway you can build bridges?

Notsuredontknow · 07/09/2023 17:25

They have the right to have the wedding they want. Even if she liked you, they might still want a tiny wedding with a family celebration after, lots of couples do similar. You’re hurt because you had an expectation of what it would be,. That’s fine but don’t react because of your hurt. You’ll definitely damage the relationship further

Adelaide66 · 07/09/2023 17:26

Their wedding, their choice remember.
Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?
I would choose the latter every time,

PackBacker · 07/09/2023 17:29

Go to the meal.

cruffinsmuffin · 07/09/2023 17:29

Sounds like they want the ceremony to just be them and they're eloping, but are excited to celebrate the week after with you all? Seems like a good plan!

I'm sure your son is part of the decision making too, can't put it all on his partner, they'll have made these plans together.

Original poster
Bubbs001 · 07/09/2023 17:32

The trouble is I know her mum is going to be there they booked a wedding last year but because her mum and dad are separated and don’t talk she cancelled it and I only found out about it on instagram when she posted it before my son came down to tell us

OP posts:
trevthecat · 07/09/2023 17:35

We got married like this. It was our choice. We didn't want a big wedding. Our parents were happy we were doing it our way.
Try being happy for him and building a relationship with her

Jackydaytona · 07/09/2023 17:37

It's not your wedding

It's not about being "good enough"

Go and celebrate with them and stop being a dick

Runnerduck34 · 07/09/2023 17:57

Just seen your update.
If her mum will be at the wedding rather than just bride groom and DC it would upset me.
Not so bad if no one is invited , if her mum is there i can see why you feel like its a rejection. So yanbu to be upset, but for the sake of keeping a relationship with my son Id still go the meal.

FofB · 07/09/2023 17:58

You turn up. Buy them something to mark the occasion. Smile nicely. Don't mention her parents. Write them a heartfelt card. Act like adults. Ask them about the day and listen to the answers. Ask to see pictures. Engage and try to share the day. If you behave badly, you will have proved her right.

Sayitaintso33 · 07/09/2023 18:09

Men take priority over women in life, but Brides definitely take priority over Grooms in weddings. It's not really his wedding, it's his wife's.

Enjoy the meal. You'd be a fool not to go.

LylaLee · 07/09/2023 18:09

If 'we're too common for her' is true, then the problem is your son, marrying someone who treats his family with contempt.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread