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Original poster

Pls help me work out what relation this baby is to me ?

23 replies

medianewbie · 06/09/2023 10:16

Need to send a card and Get It Right...
My great-grandmother had two daughters. One had a daughter (whom I assume is my 1st cousin??) She's 5 yrs older than me & I have her name as my middle name. She had a son (2nd cousin?) He & his wife have just had a baby. Is that baby my 3rd cousin? Help...

OP posts:
TwoBlueFish · 06/09/2023 10:19

I think your cousins children are your first cousins once removed, so their children would be your first cousins twice removed (2 generations away).

second cousins would be your children and your cousins children and third cousins would be your grandchildren and your cousins grandchildren.

ReeseWitherfork · 06/09/2023 10:20

Your great grandmother had two daughters.
One was your grandmother yes?
So the other was your great auntie
Great Auntie’s daughter (GAD) is your mums cousin
GAD is your first cousin once removed
GAD’s son is your first cousin twice removed
GAD’s son’s son is your first cousin thrice removed

Is that right? Might need a diagram.

NoNotHimTheOtherOne · 06/09/2023 10:22

Your great-grandmother's daughter is your great aunt.

Your great-aunt's daughter is your 1st cousin once removed.

Your first cousin once removed's son is your second cousin.

Your second cousin's baby is your second cousin once removed.

https://www.rd.com/article/second-cousin-once-removed/

What’s a Second Cousin vs. Second Cousin Once Removed?

Why are some of your relatives "removed"? Learn to tell your second cousin from your second cousin once removed with this handy chart.

https://www.rd.com/article/second-cousin-once-removed

Interested in this thread?

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Families
GingerIsBest · 06/09/2023 10:23

I think @ReeseWitherfork has it although I think I'd say you were second cousins once removed to GAD's daughter.

I honestly wouldn't be worrying about this level of detail though. I'd go with, "welcome to the family" or some such. Because genetically, the relationship is pretty thin - this child's great great grandmother was your great grandmother....

Or, do what we do... just call everyone "cousin" in a sort of friendly, slightly ironic kind of way.

Original poster
medianewbie · 06/09/2023 10:29

@ReeseWitherfork I think so ...
GGM (Smith) had 2 Dds. One was my Grandmother (Winnie). She had a son, My Dad. He had me. I have 2 kids.
The other daughter had a daughter (I'm named after) that's my Dad's direct cousin so would be my 1st cousin once removed). Her son would be my 1st cousin 2 removed? So his baby (the one the card is for) would be my 3rd cousin once removed ? (& my kids 4th cousin once removed??)
I can't get my head around this stuff 🥴 (as you may tell😆)

OP posts:
Nagado · 06/09/2023 10:38

Are you on Ancestry? You can set up a very basic family tree, with just the people you’ve named above, and it will tell you exactly what relation each person is to the tree holder (which would be you). It’s free (because you won’t be looking at any documents) and you can set the settings to private so nobody can see anyone’s names (or just use fake names). It does all of the 3rd cousin twice removed stuff for you.

DappledThings · 06/09/2023 10:39

I think new baby is your second cousin once removed and your children's 3rd cousin.

But it really doesn't matter. I have a set of third cousins I'm quite close to and just refer to them as my cousins. Same with my other cousins who are technically step-cousins.

DappledThings · 06/09/2023 10:45

It's a bit scribbled but this is my understanding.

Pls help me work out what relation this baby is to me ?
Original poster
medianewbie · 06/09/2023 10:49

Not on Ancestry no.
Yes, can refer to as 'Cousin' but wanted to get it correct if poss. They are a huge family I've only recently 'met' (hence being a bit 'try hard' maybe) so I can't say 'welcome to the family'.

OP posts:
Original poster
medianewbie · 06/09/2023 10:51

@DappledThings Thank you ! Flowers

OP posts:
CurlewKate · 06/09/2023 10:54

In dp's family that would just be a cousin.

Talipesmum · 06/09/2023 11:02

You need the Cousin Explainer tea towel!
https://www.presentindicative.com/products/cousin-explainer-teatowel

I think the baby is your second cousin once removed.

Pls help me work out what relation this baby is to me ?
Catabogus · 06/09/2023 11:03

Second cousin once removed (third cousin to your children).

MinnieTruck · 06/09/2023 11:04

CurlewKate · 06/09/2023 10:54

In dp's family that would just be a cousin.

Same in my family😂

geoger · 06/09/2023 11:08

To me everyone is a cousin. But, I always thought my first cousins (aunt/uncle dc)children and my children were second cousins and so on…….at least in my culture that’s how we explain it

Duchessofmuchness · 06/09/2023 11:13

Second cousin once removed

If you have children - they and this new baby are third cousins (you and father are second cousins)

Differentstarts · 06/09/2023 11:16

I really wouldn't worry just send a congratulations on your baby card

CharlotteBog · 06/09/2023 11:39

My understanding is that 'removed' is added when generations get added.
We all know what a first cousin is.

I am the generation directly below my Mum, so her 1st cousin is my 1st cousin once removed.
That same 1st cousin is 1st cousin twice removed to my children.

Only when you start traversing (children of cousins) do you enter the world of 2nd and 3rd cousins and then it's just easier to call them all cousins!

Lyricallie · 06/09/2023 11:45

I don’t think it really matters lol. Are you really going to write “so happy to have a 3rd cousin once removed” in a card? Surely a congratulations on your beautiful baby would suffice?

Floralnomad · 06/09/2023 11:50

You are really overthinking this @medianewbie , just send a congratulations on your baby card and be done with it .

jolaylasofia · 06/09/2023 11:52

medianewbie · 06/09/2023 10:16

Need to send a card and Get It Right...
My great-grandmother had two daughters. One had a daughter (whom I assume is my 1st cousin??) She's 5 yrs older than me & I have her name as my middle name. She had a son (2nd cousin?) He & his wife have just had a baby. Is that baby my 3rd cousin? Help...

if your great grandmother had two daughters and a had a daughter that wouldn't be your 1st cousin. 1st cousins are children of direct aunts and uncles

Original poster
medianewbie · 06/09/2023 11:57

Floralnomad · 06/09/2023 11:50

You are really overthinking this @medianewbie , just send a congratulations on your baby card and be done with it .

Yes, that's a fair observation. But people do like to be factual (hence Ancestry trees etc) This is the family I was kept from for most of my life (I'm 55) Recent DNA has proved I am 'one of them'. We are all happy about that.

OP posts:
CostaDelPatio · 06/09/2023 12:10

The number (first, second, third) relates to how many equal generations between you both from your common ancestor.

For example my grandmother is your grandmother. We have one generation (our parents) between us from our common ancestor so we are first cousins.

The removed relates to the generationally equal ancestor and how many generations separate you from them.

For example my great grandfather is your grandfather. There is one generation between you and your grandfather (your parent) so you are looking for your equal in my line. That would be my parent so we have the first part - we are first cousins XXXXX. Now we count the removed, how many generations to get to our equal = one. So we are first cousins once removed.

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