Just want old SI scars gone

[RandomButtons]

I’m so fed up. I went through hell as a child and young teenager, I self injured when I was 14, stopped at 18, worked bloody hard and sorted my life out in my 20’s.

Im in my 40’s now and I’m so fed up of always having to wear long sleeves and melt in the heat. Or bare arms and get judged. I made the mistake of wearing bare arms on the school run once, and the queen bee instantly recoiled and I’ve been shut out of any groups and my kids have been shut out.

I’ve searched and searched and there is no treatment I can find that would actually work. I could try tattoos but I just don’t like the way full sleeves work.

I used to live in a more understanding area where no one judged, but the community I live in now is so tight woven and judgemental and I feel like a social pariah. I’d love to move back to where I used to live, but DH is tied to his job and we just can’t afford the area. I’m stuck in a little town full of little minded people, and my kids being excluded is getting to me so much.

If you have bare arms and someone judges you because of the scars, they are not worth bothering with. I am so sorry this happened to you. I can't advise much I am afraid. Although could specialist make up help if you want to cover the scars?

Have you tried camouflage makeup? Where I live the GP can refer you to a service that will match to your skin tone, show how to apply etc. the stuff is waterproof too.

https://dermablend.com/collections/scar-makeup

As AndTheSurveySays posted, maybe GP referral:

www.changingfaces.org.uk/for-professionals/health-social-care-professionals/refer-patient-skin-camouflage/patient-referral/

I’m in a similar situation, and I have to wear short sleeves for work. I tried a treatment a few years ago which did help a bit, they basically dry tattooed over the scars which causes them to re-heal flatter, but they’re by no means gone. I’m just trying to get to a place of acceptance!

@RandomButtons I'm glad you're in a better place now. 💕

I've a friend who SI also and she has scars quite randomly on her body, so no order to them.
She tells people she was ejected through a car window during a crash and they seem to accept that.
I'm not saying you should have to lie or feel any shame in how you got your scars, at all, it's simply nobody's business to judge how you got them so if a lie would make it easier, then lie? Your scars and story aren't there as a weapon to hurt you with and if you're feeling excluded, that's exactly how they're being used.

We had a student in school who had very uniformed scars so it was quite obvious is was SI, but she has the full sleeve tattoos covering them now. Pretty tattoos too, flowers and birds etc

Or, you could find people who think you're a survivor, you're brave and are proud of the journey you've been on and your healing. Fuck some mum mafia bullshit off, you have lived through enough trauma to let some motherland Amanda type make you feel uncomfortable in your body.

It may be scarred but its got you through some tough times 💐

OP, I've got scars that are over 40 years old, and have just accepted them as part of who I am. People do occasionally make comments I just reply "it was a long time ago" and move on.
I do sometimes see people with similar scars, there's usually a little nod of acknowledgment, it's not as rare as some may think.

My arms are covered in scars. I’ve never hid them and never had any friends even comment on them. Only ever had 2 negative comments (from random men, surprise surprise). Would you consider trying wearing short sleeves? If people judge you then it says so much about them. I do actually have a full tattoo sleeve on one arm which does distract people from my scars, but admittedly it’s not for everyone.

You can have them cut out and sewn up if they're big enough. I don't know the exact procedure name but I know if a scar is wide and deep it can be cut out, and a good plastic surgeon can make it neater/less noticeable. If you've got what I call normal 14 year old SI scars - lots and lots of fine razor cuts, then tattooing some may be an option.

Same here.
30 years on and nothing will shift them. I don't show them to anyone. They really get me down.

I saw a beautiful tattoo sleeve by an artist local to me recently, it's not a traditional every inch is coloured in type but was lots of beautiful realistic pictures linked to each other with space between. Something like that might work for you.

I understand what people are saying about not bothering with anybody who has a problem with the scars. OP might very well do that. But OP also mentions that their children are being excluded. The opinions of others might be relatively easy for OP to brush off, but the exclusion of their children will be difficult to see.

I have these too, lots of razor cuts. I used to hide them but these days I just wear short sleeves. They look better if my arms are a bit tanned but I mostly forget they are there.

Having said that, your situation sounds rough and its nuts that your kids are being impacted by this. Sorry your fellow school parents are so crappy.