What will I do all day??

[Wtfnowseptember]

I'm just looking for a bit of advice please. I've basically had an injury for the past 6 weeks which means that I can't walk far and can't drive. I don't know how long until it gets better and I can do these things again. It also means that I can't go to work, and can't yet WFH due to pain, although I do need to try and keep active.

I'm new to a rural area, so no friends or family. Dh at work and dc at school. Poor public transport, but if I got somewhere, I'm not sure I'd have the strength the get back home even if I did get the bus.

Wtf am I supposed to do all day?? I'm obviously very limited physically or I'd be getting on top of the house and garden.

I'm seriously worried about my mental health. I can't sleep for stressing about my situation and when I do sleep I have nightmares and wake up screaming, which makes me scared to sleep.

Obviously I only get so much sick pay, so worried about long term implications of that too.

I've also probably put a stone on in that time as I was bed bound for a while, and my only joy has been shit food.

I guess I just need a plan for the next few weeks (months?). How do I spend my days?? How do I stay bright?? What would you do??

Sounds tricky. If you need to be resting up don't try and push yourself too hard.

I'd try and get out into the garden every day and sit with a cuppa, or have a short walk if you're up to it, fresh air will do you good.

Any clubs online you could do? I use Goodreads and am part of various online book clubs there.

Duolingo is free if you wanted to maybe start to learn a language. Keep your brain active! Also do you like knitting/crochet?

The fact your thinking like this and knowing you need to keep busy/ active is a great sign. When I was bed bound/ very limited mobility I had to structure my day to stay sane. It might seem a bit embarrassing but I would literally write a little plan for the day including simple things like meals and washing/ getting changed.

Some ideas (but obviously depends on your interests and how you are feeling/ limits)

• podcasts

-books (mix of non fiction and fiction)

• writing/ journalling
• puzzles
• drawing or painting
• sitting in garden
• films/ documentaries
• listening to the radio

-online shopping

• sorting bills/ insurance/ admin
• sewing or cross stitch
• basic baking or cooking
• sorting out photos
• organising a drawer or small cupboard

It is really hard and I think the key is do a mix so don't just spend all your time watching TV, mix a couple of activities a day.

It sounds like you need something that feels productive? I really enjoy embroidery - Paraffle is a great business that does kits that make up fairly quickly and are suited to beginner levels, and also look good eg cushions.

You say you can't get on top of the house - but what about limited projects? Going through drawers one at a time and being ruthless about keeping/throwing out. You can go at your own pace.

Do you have anything that could usefully be catalogued, such as books or music? Can you start planning out Christmas presents now as hopefully you'll be busy with work by the time December rolls around? Research next year's holiday if funds allow?

It's hard to know without knowing exactly what activity levels you can tolerate.

Can you pinpoint what your worries are? Waking up with nightmares would point to you being very distressed by what's happening, do you usually have trouble sleeping or is this new?

Ordinarily - I would have a routine planned out, so each morning getting washed, breakfast and dressed at the same time each day, and then doing whatever rehab exercises you need to do. Then breaking up the day with hobbies and interests like reading, crochet/knitting, puzzles, adult paint by numbers- I blew my back and was in a similar position with limited movement.

Focus on learning a new skill, or a hobby you used to enjoy when young, give yourself the time to recuperate. Try to have a really good wind down to bed time, good nutrition and building new habits.

I would say if you have a work assistance scheme it would be a good idea to contact them about your sleep if your having problems.

I don't know if this will help, but I empathise over the worry about putting on weight during a period of enforced inactivity. This is me at the moment, although I expect to be back to normal fairly soon. I plan to try to eat mostly salads and soup at lunchtime for a bit, and have a main meal including lots of vegetables. Would you perhaps be able to put in a bit of time each day, or a few times a week, peeling and chopping veg for soups, salads, stews etc?

Thank you everyone, your replies really mean a lot and I'm going to try to do a bit of everything suggested. I think I'll need to write down a plan for each day.

I've done a healthy online shop and will be trying to cook some different dinners for us. Something I'm not a natural at.

I'll think of a house task every day.

I think its the isolation that I really struggle with. Nobody to just pop in for a chat.

I'm not sleeping as I'm worried about not getting better, which means no job which means lose the house, which means dc can't get to school, which means I'm trapped as its too remote etc etc. The whole injury freaks me out in itself. I hate the way it feels and I'm constantly on edge.

I'm going to write all your ideas down. I think I need to be referred to occy health too.

Join the wi online
Listen to self development podcasts
Read
Netflix
Bullet journal

Investigate what can help you recover as quickly/as best as you can. All the other issues will fall away once you are better. So physio for example. Simple exercise. Whatever it is.

Then write down what you can actually do.

Go from there.

Do read about your health condition - research it, join online groups or forums eg Facebook groups etc. While Dr Google can be scary, as someone also currently coming to terms with a disability and having to limit what I can do, knowledge is power, and I've found my fears were worse than the reality. Knowing more has enabled me to manage and plan my recovery and engage with doctors from a position of relative understanding. Your nightmares may cease if you stop running away from your fears?

Also would you have interest in any creative hobbies? - painting, short stories etc etc? This kind of thing can be immensely helpful psychologically and create something positive out of trauma while also being a flow sctivity that you just don't notice you're involved in.

Also, do look at online classes for any interest - since lockdown, there are classes for everything, and you can get social engagement in online classes.

I suppose where we differ is I love having a break to think and be - maybe rather viewing this as a loss could you try to view it as an amazing opportunity which few of us get to step away from the rat race for a little while?

As for the long term, I do get that there are long term security fears, but frankly we're in a cost of living crisis, and this can affect anyone, so no point stressing, if you need to cross that bridge, you can, but for now, your main priority needs to be recovering and giving yourself the TLC you deserve. Put yourself first, be kind to yourself, you do deserve it. Hope you feel more cheerful soon.

Family history. You'll never want to leave the house again !

Teach yourself something from YouTube....sewing, upholstery, cake decorating....

@frozendaisy @womanone

Yes, I need to focus on my exercises and getting it sorted. I've subscribed to some YouTube channels.

I do really like my space, but it's been ages now!

I'd use some of the time for an overhaul of finances. Not sure what your injury is, but if possible clear out lower cupboards/drawers. Definitely get yourself out in the garden or a short walk if you can manage every day, while you're at it take your time to enjoy the fresh air, listen to birds and take in your surroundings. You wouldn't be able to keep me away from books, magazines and jigsaws. Do you have friends you could catch up on something like zoom?