Does anyone else know one of 'those' successful type families?

[BananasinOodies]

Does anyone else know one of those family's where they're sorted and successful and good looking?! I have two on my radar through school. Parents good looking and good jobs, house gorgeous, kids brainy and always doing wholesome stuff like climbing hills, surfing and so on. Parents choosing various activities and so on very wisely so their kids get the scholarship, place on elite team, job in parliament, Oxbridge etc. Both families have parents who are always taking on huge challenges (climbing Everest in a day type things). I feel so inadequate! (And yes I am jealous, where do they get their energy from, I'm EXHAUSTED from working and housework).
Am I alone in being decidedly boring, at best average and well, just knackered?!

I knew a few families like this except they are not good looking. Attractive & in shape but not beautiful or super handsome.

Actually, I don’t think I know anyone who lives such a charmed life. I do know some folk who have really good looking on the surface lives, but then behind it they have their own struggles.

Yes know a couple of families like this, but we are happy with us so not jealous.

Money is what I think most of it boils down to. If you’re rich you can afford to do all those things - I’d love to do more ‘challenges’ (like the climbing thing you mention) and pay for surfing lessons etc for the kids but I can’t afford it. Elite sports for kids are expensive (swimming once you get competitive, riding, tennis, rowing etc) too. Kids can go on expensive school trips to Vietnam etc and go cycling by in the Himalayas etc You can also pay for schooling or tutoring to help make average kids cleverer. And also buy nice clothes / posh highlights/ expensive gyms etc so you look better.
its all to do with money!

You'd probably look at my family and think that. We went on a family run this morning, just for example. High performing DC at school, good jobs, lovely home, slim, attractive etc.

What you don't see is our struggles with mental health, serious health issues, disability, elderly parents with serious issues, some awful family relationships, being treated poorly at work, stressful legal proceedings, childhood abuse etc.

It's easy to look at someone else's life and think that it's charmed. It's much harder to actually walk in those shoes.

Yes. But it's not all plain sailing. The mum puts a mega positive spin on everything and rarely admits to it being shit.

I mean if they are off climbing Everest they mostly likely have family help to look after kids, cleaners, gardeners.

Money basically so all the mundane stuff can be outsourced.

Yes, I know a couple of families like that. I never know whether it’s Tiger Mother syndrome or whether these families just instinctively do these things. Ie. Their horizons are wider. We’ll book a week self catering in France, and they’ll do a thousand mile trek across the Himalayas.(made up examples).

it all sounds a bit tiering to me.

Yes I know 3 like that. They all have money. But yes, I think it comes down to energy. If I forced myself to be that organised I think id have a breakdown.

I think it comes down to having the confidence to say yes to things.

I could say yes to a two week skiing trip, I couldn't afford to pay for it though 🤷‍♀️

Hell yes. DS g/f family are like this. We couldn’t be more different

I know a couple of families like this but they're not super high achieving.
They're all good looking.
They have good jobs but pretty standard professional jobs or self employed.
Kids doing well. University etc but not oxbridge.
They're sporty and do challenges. They've always been on family running challenges, bike rides. Yes they climb mountains and swim in lakes but nothing elite.
They're fab people too.

Why do you feel you have to be at that level op? Surely any steps towards that is good?

You’ve just described most of my friends lol 😆 and they’re all wonderful people with very sweet kind kids so I can’t fault them as much as I’d like to 😂

In many cases the kids are still very young but I can see them being en route to the kind of things you describe because their parents are ambitious and high up in their careers and still love travel and enjoying a social life etc.

I know a few families like this. One of them did a trek to Machu Picchu for a family holiday but their dd had developed an uber posh accent from her private school and consequently pronounced it more like ‘Machy Pichy’.

We met one on holiday once. It was a family activity holiday and they were only other family. Father renowned doctor in his field, mother director of faculty at a university, oldest son doing medicine at Cambridge, two other teen boys.

They were lovely, so accomplished in everything but so kind to my DC who were less so. Never in the least bit patronising to any of us, made you feel like they were genuinely interested etc.

They were way better than us at all the scheduled activities, the younger boys seemed to be able to do impossible tricks on their skateboards, they were even brilliant at Kareoke. I'm a bit of a runner and mother said her middle son was just starting to do a but, we should go for a run. I've since seen him running for England!

I know some who have ‘made it so’ for Ivy League’ since birth. If kids set up charity at 12 & help less fortunate overseas (good for them, etc) it obvs takes ££ & serious parental investment.

And me - exhausting!
I know many families like that, they're usually the ones who get up at stupid hours to go swimming for a local club!

I know one family like this and after a while realised that mum and dad are just psychopaths with a lot of money. Constantly seeking more thrills and don't really have much empathy. They have money to throw at DC to ensure they succeed and they have connections but actually they're a bit hollow inside.

Yes a few and one family unit is definitely truly happy, but has dreadful family problems around them constantly... Another looks so charmed but us rotten to the core.

LMAO!
I could say yes to buying a 1.5 million pound house, but on my £30k salary, the bank just doesn't seem to have the confidence to say yes to the mortgage. Can't think why. 🧐

I could say yes to climbing Everest. But my boss only gives me 16 days annual leave a year and I've used most of it on medical appointments for the children so I suppose my boss wouldn't have the confidence to say "yes you can have extra paid time off and come back to your job when you're done fannying around on a mountain for weeks on end." Again, I just don't know why they might say no to this. 😂

Most people are not architects of their own destiny and it's not down to mindset or other hunbot woo bollocks it's down to systemic disempowerment and a glass ceiling on individual upwards mobility for most people.

I went to a playdate at a house with a family like this today OP and the rift between us was so great. I tried to keep up the conversation but I've never been skiing so... 🤷‍♀️

That's what I was going to say @frozendaisy . They probably aren't wearing themselves out with school runs, cleaning and laundry or up at night worrying how they will pay the gas bill this winter.

I probably do know these families but only to say hello to. The key is to not compare, unfollow on social media if that’s where you’re seeing all this stuff and concentrate on your own family.