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Original poster

Daughters sectioned in psychiatric facility

61 replies

SpiderExtinction · 02/09/2023 16:52

I think I'm posting this because I am so tired and worn down and just needed a place to chat.

My daughter was sectioned in March this year and has been in a psychiatric facility ever since. She has improved a lot from how she was. Back in February she suffered with psychosis which is complicated with severe anxiety, depression, a learning disability and possible autism. She stopped eating, drinking, sleeping, using the toilet, even moving. She still has a poor appetite but has improved greatly with all the above.

The only thing that she has regressed with is talking. Since May, she has displayed selective mutism. I also found out that she had been showered by a male carer which would have traumatised her - she's scared of men. Her closing down like that seemed to coincide with that incident. Does anyone know if male staff are meant to shower female staff one to one?

We are working towards her discharge but it seems to be taking so long for anyone to make any decisions about anything. Planning started in June and we still have no decisions made. Each week drags on and seems like it's all going round in circles. They keep trying to push a 'gradual' return home which I know would be traumatic for my daughter. Her admission to hospital was immensely traumatic where she had to be taken into the ambulance and hospital against her will. If she came home and then got taken away again, this could potentially cause trauma for her again.

She has indicated to the social worker twice. that she wants to come home. Professionals agree that the clinical environment is having a negative impact on her now, yet nothing is moving forward. I'm just so tired.

Her section ends on 30 September. If nothing is sorted, am I allowed to just go get her? She's 19 by the way.

OP posts:
Original poster
SpiderExtinction · 03/09/2023 15:58

@DarkWingDuck I know it does happen but thankfully there are more caring staff than not. I have never suspected anything like abuse and my mind never went there as I couldn't accuse anyone of that without evidence. It's more because I know the situation would traumatise her and I'm worried it has affected her deeply.

OP posts:
Original poster
SpiderExtinction · 03/09/2023 17:35

TheCatterall · 03/09/2023 15:52

Have you spoken to pals at the hospital about the shower incident.

I’m not sure on the rules but I often chase up Ward Managers, PALS, community workers, social workers etc for my son - but he has schizophrenia so rather different. I basically ring every contact I have and governance officers etc until someone gives me answers.

id also contact local carers forums and support groups they might be able to advise and help more.

I haven't spoken to them yet but I was thinking of doing so, just to get some advice on the matter.

I don't want to cause bad feeling though because I want to work with staff for my daughter but at the same time, I feel that they added trauma to her already poor mental state.

OP posts:
Original poster
SpiderExtinction · 03/09/2023 17:36

Also if anyone knows, is it normal for me to be refused meeting minutes for meetings I was part of?

OP posts:
Iwasafool · 03/09/2023 19:05

SpiderExtinction · 03/09/2023 15:35

@Iwasafool The staff told me and my mum that there were no female staff available and she had to have a shower every day as it's hospital policy. In her care plan, it describes showering as being 1 to 1 staff so as not to overwhelm her. It has also been told to us by staff that she needs help washing her body and hair so I would assume the male staff member did that for her.

They said it happened twice but as far as I am aware, no female staff were present as they said they had none available.

I'm so surprised, to be honest if a male member of staff had been told to do that where I worked he would have refused. Just as it was dangerous for her it would be dangerous for a man due to allegations that could be made and most of our guys were dads so they wouldn't have been comfortable doing that anyway.

I can't believe he was the only member of staff on duty so I think he could have got someone else to do it, even if it meant swapping with another ward for half an hour.

Honestly I can't get my head round that.

Iwasafool · 03/09/2023 19:08

What I meant by dads was alot of our guys had teenage kids of their own and they wouldn't have been happy to do that as they wouldn't want it for their own kids.

Roseau18 · 03/09/2023 19:18

SpiderExtinction · 03/09/2023 17:36

Also if anyone knows, is it normal for me to be refused meeting minutes for meetings I was part of?

Theoretically no but it has happened to me.

Original poster
SpiderExtinction · 04/09/2023 18:18

@Iwasafool That's a good point, he could be opening himself up to allegations. I'm a fairly reasonable person and wouldn't accuse someone of that without evidence but some people out there wouldn't be so reasonable.

I went to see her today and the physio showed me how to do her neck exercises for when she is at home. She holds her head really low and to the side so the exercises are to keep her muscles working.

I'm a bit concerned because they have admitted a new patient on the ward who is quite loud and shouts aggressively. He is quite agitated. How my daughter is though, this sort of thing will frighten her and I'm worried it may cause her to regress. I have put my worries forward to staff and they agree with me. I think they are trying to have the other patient moved to another area of the hospital. It's a difficult position that they are in which I completely understand. Just worried for my daughter.

Do you think I should mention the male showers to her IMHA even though it's not happening anymore?

OP posts:
Purplepinkfairy · 04/09/2023 18:32

Females (nurses/carers) shower males every day and vice versa. If the staff member is trained whether male/female I don't think there would be a policy on it in the workplace. I'm not saying it's right/wrong ....just stating the fact.

Silkiebunny · 04/09/2023 18:40

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Silkiebunny · 04/09/2023 18:43

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This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

hiredandsqueak · 04/09/2023 20:29

I'm so sorry for what you and your daughter have gone through. My daughter went through burnout at fifteen, she is now twenty, she is still very fragile, easily overwhelmed, needs lots of rest, low demands. I'm not sure whether she will ever be the person she once was and I'm really sad about that but she's here and for a long time I was worried I'd lose her and that worry has gone for now anyway. Dd has speech therapy fortnightly to help with the SM, it seems to be helping she managed to speak to a new tutor last week which I could hardly believe. Tutors, speech therapy, occupational therapy, support workers are all secured through her EHCP. You could maybe explore options for provision for dd later through her EHCP as I imagine she still has one?

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