Would you let your 15yo out for a solo rural walk now?

[LadyofLansallos]

DD thinks we are extremely unfair & ridiculous for not letting her go out at 8.30 on her own, to walk through the village to take the footpath up the hill on her own. It is dark here by now.

Would you?

Not alone, no.

I grew up rurally, and my mother wouldn't let us, because she was worried poachers would see us and catch our eyes in the lights and shoot us, mistaking us for animals. I don't think she was worried we'd be raped though.

Tell her she can get up early and go at first light. If she does, the boyfriend must be something special.

This.

Hmm. I always think MN is overly cautious but dark, alone, rural, no streetlights, footpath (not a sidewalk) does sound uncomfortable. I mean, I wouldn't enjoy doing that. It's totally different from staying out late in the town or cycling in the dark from friends house

I wonder if she's meeting someone on the walk or using the walk as an excuse to meet someone and they don't actually go to the hill.

No, she's had all day to go for a walk.
If she has her own room she can stay in there with some earphones.
I suspect she's got designs for something else rather than just a walk.
Smoking? Boyfriend/Girlfriend?

Blimey. I used to walk alone in rural areas early morning and dusk from 14 onwards before mobile phones and my parents never had a problem with it. I wasn’t even meeting anyone, I just liked my own company and the peace and quiet.

No wonder teenagers now have so little independence. At what age will they be allowed out alone?

I don't believe the walking story for a minute. She's meeting someone. Or at least she's hoping too.

(I grew up in small village so spend years roaming the fields to meet with friends in nearby villages or walking dogs or riding ponies etc. No-one changes into a miniskirt to go for a walk alone in a field at night).

To be fair if she had said she was meeting a friend we would have let her. But the friend she usually meets at this sort of time of night for a walk is away, so no chance of using them for an alibi.

she hasn’t always been very trustworthy in the past which probably complicates our responses.

I walked a lot as a teenager but not off the streets after dark. I wouldn’t do it now either.

Sounds like you need a chat then to get an honest response. But she will need to be confident that you're not going to say no if she says she's meeting X (and if X is older or someone you don't know you may not agree). Also, it's possible she doesn't have a meeting arranged but just hoped to 'bump' into somebody

I grew up in rural areas so walking in the dark was compulsory in winter. I feel safe generally in isolated places (I think statistically the chance of running into an ill-wisher is so small)

I know this has got more complicated with the outfit change but for the future you might be more comfortable if she downloaded the Holly app. It can be set to shaking your phone sends an alert - all you need is decent service which you said you have.

My 15 year old DD walks/runs on footpaths all around here, mostly with the dog. I don't feel anxiety about risk from people - my concern is more that she trips and breaks something! So she doesnt tend to go in the dark and is nagging for a treadmill for the winter - probably a good idea!

Yes.