Is My Friend A Vulnerable Adult?

[WorriedFriend124]

I wasn't sure which topic would be best to post in. I hope chat is okay.

My friend (29) is partially sighted has anxiety, OCD and in the past has been depressed. (She says she's no longer depressed but I'm unsure whether that's actually accurate.) She also has ARFID though I don't think it's been officially diagnosed.
She's quite mentally unwell at the moment, leaving the house makes her panic and she's barely eating and drinking.

My friend is being abused by a close family member that she lives with.
Financially, verbally, emotionally and sometimes physically. Coercive control.

Support from the NHS for her mental health has been appalling. But my friend has struggled to engage with services which hasn't helped matters. She also has to hide that she's getting support from services from the family member that she lives with which complicates things further.

I desperately want to help her but don't know what I can do. I was hoping that if she's a vulnerable adult that I can report to adult safeguarding at her local council and they'll act.

She's begged me not to tell anyone as she's afraid of her family member going to prison. The family members worst fear is being locked up. Plus my friend fears reprisals from the family at large. (They're all dysfunctional and some of them are abusive towards my friend as well though to a much much lesser extent and as far as Im aware never physically.)

I've done as she asked mostly as I didn't know what to do and because I've been scared that she'll hate me and never want to talk to me again.

She's supposed to be leaving for university in September. However I'm dubious that she'll actually end up at uni/will be able to cope at uni because of how ill she is. Plus financially she's going to struggle to survive due to the financial abuse.

I've told my friend that if uni doesn't work out and she ends up back in the house with her family member or if the family member physically hurts her again I'm reporting it to anyone I can.

She's told me that she's told people in authority that she's being abused, a GP and a Mental Health Worker and nothing has come of that at all. So she doesn't think it's worth asking for help as nothing will be done.
However I think she hasn't told them the full extent of the abuse and deliberately withheld details for fear of getting her family member in trouble. (In fact I know she's definitely done this.)

I'm at the end of my tether. I want to follow her wishes but she can't protect herself and it's horrible to watch.

Is she classed as a vulnerable adult? Would the safeguarding team actually help?

I know it's been a long post, thank you for taking the time to read it.

She sounds vulnerable, but what happens will, to some extent, depend on her capacity and choices. Does she want to leave the people who are hurting her? You can definitely ring the safeguarding number for your council for advice, and they might have links with domestic violence charities. I assume she doesn't want to make a complaint to the police?

Thank you for the reply.

She doesn't want to be living with the family member but can't afford to not be partly because of the financial abuse (and she also feels unsafe being alone).

She definitely doesn't want to make a complaint to the police. Though last time she was hit she was considering calling them. She decided not to in the end.

She's just not capable of saying no to the family member, she says the consequences aren't worth it. And that her saying no doesn't matter, whatever she said no to still happens despite her saying no just with a load more abuse.

I've tried to persuade her to contact domestic abuse charities, she contacted a local one but didn't hear back. She chased it a few times before giving up. She's also scared that the charity would report the abuse and her family member would be arrested.

Communicating with the charity was also problematic as email isn't safe (family member has access to her email and reads and deletes things). Phone calls are also difficult as she can't take them in front of the family member and there's very limited times she could talk on the phone. And letters for my friend are all opened and read by family member.

I think she needs to speak to a dv charity and find out how she can move out to her own place asap.

Or maybe you can do it with her if she's anxious.

Can she contact student services at uni and ask if they can help. Possibly temporarily accommodation and support

I really think she needs to go to a refuge to recover then plan for uni Autumn 24

@BlueBlubbaWhale thank you for your reply.
I've offered to contact them for her before and offered to be there with her if she contacts them herself but last time I asked she was waiting for the local charity to call her back.
I'll offer again now.

@NorwayLass that's a really good idea thank you, I'll suggest that to her and offer to support her to do so

Definition of a vulnerable adult under the care act is:

a)has needs for care and support (whether or not the authority is meeting any of those needs), (b)is experiencing, or is at risk of, abuse or neglect, and. (c)as a result of those needs is unable to protect himself or herself against the abuse or neglect or the risk of it.

So I would say yes and there is a duty to safeguard

@crew2022 thank you, I was hoping that would be the case