Why are they doing this to themselves

[AssCloud]

I work as a nanny. I am mainly live out but sometimes I am required to stay overnights and work overnights for up to a week at a time.

When I am overnights, usually there is still a parent there and I am usually helping for when a parent is not available.

Something I observed is that, these people are really not going to bed on time. Often it's around midnight and when there's a school term it's still the same time when they have to be up again early in the morning.

Sometimes there's so many after school activities or dinners out or whatever. Sometimes they are only ever coming in the door for about 8 or 9 at night. Then they have dinner and sit and watch TV. It's actually we'll after midnight often by the time they start going to bed. They are too tired in the mornings and breakfasts are rushed if they are even lucky to get breakfast.

Some times they are only sitting down to TV for 10 or 10.30 at night and I'm thinking it should be bedtime now. I think the late nights are just robbing from their mornings.

I just can't see why they are doing this to themselves. Staying up late and rushing in the mornings and not allowing a proper breakfast. I am getting the brunt end of the morning time moods.

Are they adults? I think this is normal for many adults.
I go to bed at 10pm latest and am often asked how I’ve gone to bed so early and comments like oh no I don’t go to bed until at least midnight etc. People underestimate how much sleep they need

I am not sure what you mean by these people are really not going to bed on time, who decides what 'on time' is?

I am usually in bed by midnight, have tried going to bed earlier but just do not sleep. Some people are night owls some not.

I know when I worked day shifts, usually took me till midnight to unwind properly.

Id be awake all night if I went to bed at 10.

I only sleep around 5 or 6 hours a night, I’ve always been the same, I’m a night owl as well which doesn’t help!

I just can’t sleep anymore than that.

some people are just like that 🤷‍♀️

People with long working hours often go to bed late as otherwise it feels like life is just work + sleep?

This is the adults you're referring to ?

No, there's some teens in the mix. I think midnight or after is too late especially they have to be up again between 6.30 and 7.

Usually when I am at home I am in bed by 11 or 11.30. So when I go to work my sleep scheduled is turned upside down by the family. I am required to stay up til the kids and teens are in bed. There are nights, by the time they are all off to bed, it's 1 in the morning by the time I am going to bed. Then I ha e to be up again early and honestly there are times I'm only getting about 4 hours a night and it's too little.

It's called revenge bedtime procrastination. I'm guilty of it, hugely. Literally at this moment sat at my desk groggy as hell because I didn't go to bed until 1am last night and had to be up at 7.

It's when you stay up to do things you feel you don't have time to do during the day and squeeze as much "me" time into your day as possible at the expense of sleep.

Yes, I can be very guilty of this myself at times. It's when you finally get time to yourself. Sometimes I can potter around until 1 or 2 in the morning doing jobs.

What I don't understand is the TV stuff. What is so important on TV that they are not going to bed on time. I think the TV time could be shaved down and reduced mid week so that the teens could at least get into bed before midnight.

@AssCloud Kindly, I am not sure (night) nannying is the ideal profession if you're someone who needs to stick to their own schedule😅

It's a common phenomenon of which I forget the name, but the general idea is that you want to carve out time to rest and do things just for you in the evening (sitting on the sofa watching tv) even if you know you should go to bed, because you feel you are 'owed' this time having worked so hard all day.

Going to bed soon after dinner just feels depressing and like you've had no 'fun' time.

You explained it much better than me!

They can expect but you don’t have to deliver. Just say ‘right I’m going to bed now. If you want to stay up later you’ll have to get yourselves to bed. Night night’

If the parents have a problem with this they can make their kids go to bed earlier. If they are teens they don’t need putting to bed

If it's teens who have to get to school I can see your point, especially if you are supposed to stay up too (although I don't know why you can't go to bed before them).
Not for the adults though, as they are adults!

I'm confused - you stay up until between 11 and 2 and you are complaining other people stay up until between 12 and 1 and you don't know why?

But you are doing the exact same thing?

Most of the time when I am at home I am in bed early, by 11 but there were times I experienced the night time procrastation and a huge burst of energy before bed. Most of the time I am in bed by 11 though.

8 hours before you want to get up

That assumes you need or want 8 hours sleep I suppose.

Sometimes I can potter around until 1 or 2 in the morning doing jobs.

@AssCloud -- so why are you bothered about others going to bed before midnight?

I work for them and on the days or the nights I am required to stay over, I dont usually hit the bed until well after midnight and then I have to be available over night in case one of the kids wake and then I need to be up in the morning too. Usually when I stay over my sleep is only ever about 4 or 5 hours and that's not enough.

I am also concerned for the family and for the two parents. It's a heart attack waiting to happening for one or the other of them and I don't want to see that. There's too much stress in the mornings and I think it sbecause they are not going to bed on time.

The human brains needs around this, yes. I've existed on far less but I am convinced it was detrimental overall based on various things I've heard and read around the subject. There's loads of decent books on it.

I couldn't agree more
I am a parenting adviser and 'the opportunity to sleep for 10-12 hours' is my most frequent advice. It's crazy how many students fall asleep in class 😂😂

I cannot remember ever having 8 hours sleep - well not since I was a teenager and that was a very long time ago. I think some people just do not need so much sleep and some people need more. We are all different. I probably average around 6 hours and function well on that, whereas my husband gets around 8.5 hours and does not function well on less than that.

It’s your job - we do not normally set our own hours, if you need more sleep I suggest you get a new job.