Tips for hosting family for the first time

[HangingOver]

This might sound mad but due to always living in London house shares and then me and DP having lodgers, we've never hosted family in our house before. I'm suddenly feeling a bit apprehensive and noticing all the DIY that's never got done and how our towels arent that nice. And I think I need more forks.

Some people on MN seem to have a rotten time staying with family, so give me your top tips for a good family stay. They're coming a long way so I want to make them feel happy and welcome. It's DB and SIL, DNephew(5) and Baby (3m). DF staying in nearby hotel.

I think we'll go out for dinner one night and I'll probably cook or at least offer 1 - 2 nights (I'm vegan, no one else is so I wouldn't want them to have to eat my food for the whole trip) and the others I guess we'll make separate food together.

What do you do to prepare for guests?

I think letting them know to help themselves to whatever in the kitchen and make own drinks and organise own snacks is really good. I'm a tea monster so I like to know I can make endless cups (while offering to others).

Also wine/beer etiquette....

Fridge in room -ooh er. I would if I had a guest wing and they were staying months....

When I host, I keep breakfast and lunch simple and plan to cook an evening meal.

For breakfast I set out whatever cereals, breads and spreads we have and let everyone help themselves. If everyone is up together I’d put on a fry, but not every morning.

Lunch is either soup or sandwiches, and more self service.

Then for dinner, I’ll either cook, take away or eat out.

I generally leave out a fruit bowl and biscuit basket for snacking.

I cook from my freezer so I can flex to their needs and any plans.

Personally I’m happy to pamper my guests and don’t expect much help but if you do make it easy, and be upfront about it. It’s much better to say “can I leave you guys to clear up the dishes while I xxxxxx” than to simmer with resentment. Also communicate your expectations to your partner beforehand so he’s not leading bil off for drinks and tv and assuming you’ll clean up all the time.

I agree that I think it's normal to cook when you have guests or offer to order in a takeaway. It would be odd to have someone come to stay with you and be expected to sort their own meals. If you are vegan and they aren't, then just let them know what you're planning to make and say they are welcome to bring any non-vegan additions to cook or if they want anything special for the kids. All my friends with small children do tend to prepare easy meals for the kids when they stay as they may need to eat at different times or just not be willing to eat whatever you have prepared. So they bring their own pasta or stuff for sandwiches or a ready meal to make for them if they need to.

Unless they are particularly European with regards to bedtimes, dinners out may be tricky, so I wouldn't bet on a dinner out. Lunch would be more realistic. Kids may be getting twitchy and overtired by 6pm and not able to sit through a restaurant meal.

Bed/linens/towels don't matter much, but a blackout blind or something just to keep out the light might be helpful if you have a really bright room. Make sure they know where tea and coffee is and how to make it before you go to bed in case they are up before you.

Do you have a garden? If so bubble wands are good for little kids, ditto those styrofoam gliders you used to get in party bags and a ball. Otherwise some colouring books and stickers, maybe a couple of hot wheels type cars but I'd imagine they will bring their own.

Well I tried, I really did.

Been sanding and re painting all the grotty bits of the house and tidying and cleaning everything and put my newphews wee bed together and ordered him some linens with sharks on. DF drove down today and has gone straight to his hotel aaaaaand..... Scratchy throat feeling late afternoon... Took a test... You can guess the rest. So they won't be coming and DF will be here alone because he had a stroke last time he got COVID so can't risk it. I cried real tears for about an hour.

@HangingOver I’m sorry. That’s bad luck.