How do we organise this "fairly"?

[MissingTheMountain]

I've got ADHD, and I don't know if that's what is making me struggle to work it out 🙈

DH has a disability; and is currently a SAHD to our 1.5 year old.
I work full-time; in a seasonal industry - sometimes 25 hours a week, sometimes 60. This week, for example, I've worked Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday mornings; all day Thursday and Friday; and will work today and tomorrow all day too.
DS gets up at 7am-ish. He goes to bed at 7:30, but doesn't sleep through yet - sometimes he wakes every 1/2 hours; sometimes he does 4-5 hour stretches. Usually DH does the first wake or two; and then DS will only settle for me, so I do the rest of the night and DH sleeps.
DH and DS do a club/playgroup/forest school type thing most mornings; then DS has a 1 - 2 hour nap. DS also does swimming lessons on a Monday morning; and will start football on a Saturday morning.

DH needs to go to the gym - his disability is getting worse without time to work out. I need to go to lose weight; too. Before DS we both alternated swimming and weights before work, but that's harder now!

Is there any obvious time we can fit the gym in? There's a gym without a pool 15 minutes walk away; but the one with a pool - which will admittedly be better for DH - is a half an hour's walk away.

We have no childcare that isn't one of us. In-laws pretend DS and I don't exist; friends either have their own toddlers and have the weekends as family time, or work weekends. They'd have him for one-offs but not regularly.

Find a gym with a crèche .

Do you have a car?
Why can your DH not go to the gym Mon/Tues/Wed afternoon and then you go in the evening?

Two hours of gym time - 30 min walk each way there and back plus an hour to work out should be very do-able

If you’re not working every afternoon, DH can go for a swim/walk/run/gym 3 afternoons a week.

Do you want to go to the gym or lose weight? I’d focus on healthy eating to lose weight. If you want to go out, go in the evenings.

When we had young children and no childcare, I’d do classes in the evening or just put on an exercise DVD.

DH going the minute DS is down for a nap on the days you're not working sounds good. Hopefully he'd sleep for most of the time DH is gone so you can still rest.

Are you both too tired in the evenings or is there a place with a creche?

The nearest place with a creche is 50 minutes away; which is doable, but it's £140 each a month 😅

Him going when I'm not working could work! That hadn't occurred to me. It's not every week; and I often don't know when it'll be, but we could definitely that.

DH drives; I don't at the moment (a medical issue but should be sorted soon), but the walk is a nice one down the canal so it's not too bad.

You alternate going on your afternoons/days off, perhaps in the evening? He can drive to the one with a pool, you go to the one in walking distance. Les mills or various options on YouTube are good for home workouts too.