Why is sex so different for women than it is for men?

[unluckyinlove91]

Whenever I sleep with someone, I feel more connected than we did before, even if I know that the person isn’t suitable / it is not going to go anywhere. Even if the sex isn’t great, the physical act of sleeping with someone makes me crave their attention.

Yet, I know in most cases for the man, he won’t get these feelings of closeness. Which means he won’t be wanting the woman afterwards.

Basically I had a fairly drunken ONS last night. We swapped numbers and he’s messaged me today but there’s hardly anything to the conversation. No questions etc and I’ve been left on read.

I know I will most likely never see him again, and he isn’t a suitable match for me either, and I don’t know him…. but, that still doesn’t stop me from wanting him to want me, if that makes any sense?

Just wish I didn’t get like this after sex, and I guess the answer to that is to not have sex unless in a stable relationship. But, I enjoy having sex, so it’s a catch 22 really. 😤

I'm currently reading a book by two anthropologists and they would say that it's millions of years of evolution that cause women to be wired to be more likely to have feelings after sex.

An orgasm in women causes a huge rush of oxytocin (the bonding hormone).

This occurs irrespective of who the man is.

In men, they don't have the same mechanism. They can release oxytocin if they already have feelings for the woman but if not then they release other hormones that are not related to emotional bonding.

The reason all comes back to evolutionary breeding strategies which haven't changed and there's a degree to which you can't really control that.