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Original poster

Please help me feel better about turning our living room into our bedroom

24 replies

MischiefManager · 18/08/2023 20:33

We live in a beautiful rented estate cottage. For lots of reasons moving is not an option. Three children 6 year old with complex needs and teenage girl and boy. Due to youngest ones needs the older two need a safe space and space they can keep their own things safely away from her. Youngest is currently co sleeping with us but this is becoming increasingly difficult and in all honesty DH and I would really like the chance to have a bit of time together just the two of us in an evening! So we are looking at turning the living room into our bedroom. That way everyone would have a good sized bedroom each.

We have a reasonable sized kitchen diner which we have turned into a kitchen with small dining table in it and made the diner end into a cosy (tiny) living room with space to sit 4 just.

The current living room is a good size and has the log burner in it which we use a lot in winter but don't depend on it because we do have oil central heating. The plan is to give youngest a double bed so I can still sleep in with her when she needs it but set up the living room as our room. There would still be room for a small sofa in front of the log burner.

It seems the sensible option but I feel really anxious about it. I'm worried we're going to feel on top of each other in the small living space, that youngest doesn't have space to run around inside like she has (we do have a huge garden though). I'm worried about the rare occasions we have visitors and what they will think about our set up (silly I know), especially the older ones having friends over, although they only really hang out in their bedrooms anyway.

Would you turn it into a proper bedroom or keep it as a living room with some sort of temporary bed in it like a decent sofa bed or fold away bed? Has anyone got any positive stories about making this sort of set up work? Why on earth is it making me feel so anxious? Please help me feel better about it!

OP posts:
Redglitter · 18/08/2023 20:37

A friend of mine slept in the living room for about 5 years. She bought a good quality sofa bed & slept on that. Her son was in the master bedroom so she kept half the wardrobe for her things & had s chest of drawers in the upstairs hall. Wasn't ideal but it did until she could afford to move

Ladymama12 · 18/08/2023 20:41

My daughters teenage friends parents have done this, although they also still use as a lounge also. My daughter thought it was cool. My mother sleeps in her dining room has a bed in here were just used to it now. And lastly im co sleeping with my 9 month old, sge wobt sleep in cot yet. I hate it as soon as i can ill give her my room, get a fold out couch and in the evenings that will be my bedroom from then on. Its a small 2 bed flat so we need thr space of living room during the day. Good luck x

Stratocumulus · 18/08/2023 20:44

Stop feeling anxious because it’s your home and it’s ok to do what you like. You can always change it back again so try it for a few months & see how you feel.

My friend bought a comfortable truckle bed from IKEA for her home office/guests room. She’s dressed it with a beautiful spread & bold cushions. It looks stunning and is a lovely backdrop to her conference calls.

Go for it! You can do what you like within your 4 walls. That’s what your home is all about.

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Home improvement
RedHelenB · 18/08/2023 20:48

I wouldn't do it personally.

MaidOfSteel · 18/08/2023 20:52

Don't feel anxious or embarrassed, just get your home set up in a way that meets the needs of you & your family. I'd go for a great quality sofa bed, if affordable, so that it's still a really versatile room.

My dad is sleeping in his dining room now that he can't manage the stairs. He does have another spare downstairs room and I'm trying to talk him into making it an en-suite bedroom as there's plenty of space.

Our homes need to fit around what we need, when we need it.

User5653218 · 18/08/2023 20:55

If you had a good sofa bed with a good mattress you could leave it out as a bed most of the time but have the option to fold it away if you did have visitors, or if you were planning a movie night with the family or whatever.

Fishhhh · 18/08/2023 20:59

might be worth trying.

What about getting a shed for the eldest teen

CorylusAgain · 18/08/2023 21:06

Your logic is sound.
My gut feeling is that I'd trying keep the living as a family room as well rather just your bedroom. Sofa bed? Murphy bed?
Good luck

Original poster
MischiefManager · 19/08/2023 08:59

Thank you so much for the replies. I'm going to go for a sofa bed and see how we find it.

OP posts:
IrritableVowel · 19/08/2023 09:08

We have an ikea soda bed for visitors, which they have all said is very comfortable- I don't know if it would be suitable for nightly use long term but you might be able to get a better mattress topper for it. We also have the matching footstool which is big enough to hold some bedding.

You are making a cosy safe home for your children. You should never feel bad for that x

IrritableVowel · 19/08/2023 09:09

Sofa bed obvs
Although a soda bed sounds wonderful

3dogsandarabbit · 19/08/2023 09:16

I would keep it as a lounge but get a really decent comfy sofa bed, you can get some lovely ones now. You will find that as your children get older they will spend more time in their bedrooms anyway. When you think about it how much time do we as adults actually spend in our bedrooms, very little really, only at night.

Allsweep · 19/08/2023 09:20

It sounds like the best option.

I would want a proper bed and for it to be a proper bedroom though. You deserve some private comfortable space in your own home.

Akire · 19/08/2023 09:23

Do what’s best for you, how often do you really have visitors? Aren’t they usually family or very close friends who shouldn’t care less about the set up anyway? Having a child with extra needs means you do whatever you need to she’s own space and get the most sleep. Anyone who has a problem with that has no idea of life on the ground.

Original poster
MischiefManager · 19/08/2023 17:36

Thank you so much, I'm feeling much less anxious about it now Smile

OP posts:
trulyunruly01 · 19/08/2023 17:53

I'd have a look at horizontal wall beds so that you cou"d maintain flexibility between bedroom/living area. You can leave your bedding on whilst it's folded and you can place ornaments/books etc along the top so that it looks like a shelf unit or dresser. They come in nice wood finishes too.

mrswhiplington · 19/08/2023 19:15

Do what's right for you. Not quite the same thing, but a few weeks ago we turned DH's office, which was in the tiny spare bedroom, into a bedroom for me. I hadn't been sleeping properly for a long time for various reasons. I love it. Unfortunately the office is now in the kitchen diner. Not great, but I'm much happier.😄

SgtPercyTwentyman · 19/08/2023 19:23

MischiefManager · 18/08/2023 20:33

We live in a beautiful rented estate cottage. For lots of reasons moving is not an option. Three children 6 year old with complex needs and teenage girl and boy. Due to youngest ones needs the older two need a safe space and space they can keep their own things safely away from her. Youngest is currently co sleeping with us but this is becoming increasingly difficult and in all honesty DH and I would really like the chance to have a bit of time together just the two of us in an evening! So we are looking at turning the living room into our bedroom. That way everyone would have a good sized bedroom each.

We have a reasonable sized kitchen diner which we have turned into a kitchen with small dining table in it and made the diner end into a cosy (tiny) living room with space to sit 4 just.

The current living room is a good size and has the log burner in it which we use a lot in winter but don't depend on it because we do have oil central heating. The plan is to give youngest a double bed so I can still sleep in with her when she needs it but set up the living room as our room. There would still be room for a small sofa in front of the log burner.

It seems the sensible option but I feel really anxious about it. I'm worried we're going to feel on top of each other in the small living space, that youngest doesn't have space to run around inside like she has (we do have a huge garden though). I'm worried about the rare occasions we have visitors and what they will think about our set up (silly I know), especially the older ones having friends over, although they only really hang out in their bedrooms anyway.

Would you turn it into a proper bedroom or keep it as a living room with some sort of temporary bed in it like a decent sofa bed or fold away bed? Has anyone got any positive stories about making this sort of set up work? Why on earth is it making me feel so anxious? Please help me feel better about it!

Do it. We turned our dining room into a bedroom for reasons similar to yours OP. Your home, arrange it how you like to suit your lifestyle.

SgtPercyTwentyman · 19/08/2023 19:24

Sorry, didn't mean to quote the OP!

cestlavielife · 19/08/2023 19:26

Do what you need to do. It will be fine. Visitors will enjoy being cosy in the kitchen diner

Thighdentitycrisis · 19/08/2023 19:30

Lots of people do this it’s very common as housing is so expensive.
I would invest in good a sofa bed though and some decent storage for your stuff, and keep the living room for everyone

LooselyBasedOnAMadeUpStory · 19/08/2023 19:34

RedHelenB · 18/08/2023 20:48

I wouldn't do it personally.

Presumably you haven’t been in the situation where you need to, but plenty have.

DM did this, she had a bed settee and we only lived in a 2up2 down post divorce, so it had to be the living room as well. She kept her clothes in our room. She did it for around 5 years before we were able to move.

Mossstitch · 19/08/2023 20:46

Done it in the past when adult son returned after uni and didn't feel appropriate for him to share with siblings. Initially had IKEA sofabed but not very comfortable so bought a proper sprung one from dfs that pulled out and put mattress topper on for extra comfort. Big footstool contained bedding and could hide everything if had visitors. Kept my clothes on the landing. No problem, would do it again if needed as I do seem to have boomerang kids🤣

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