SIL blocked me / what would you do?

[Galaxy2846]

Hi

Everytime DH and SIL have a disagreement about something, she ends up blocking him and me so we can't call/message her. I have always said I will not be getting involved in anything between them but still I get blocked

It just annoys me as I had sent her a video message from my DD who is 3 - she wanted to wish her a Happy Birthday and realised i'm blocked

She previously did this without warning too, and she had agreed to watch DS when I went into labour but when I tried to call/message I realised I was blocked

She is 30 years old so not a child, and i'm just getting fed up with her taking it out on me like this. I'm not the type to cause any arguments which is why i've not said anything, if you were me would you say anything or just start giving her the same treatment?

I personally would just do the same in return, not necessarily block her but just disengage and let her crack on.

I certainly wouldn’t be putting myself out for or engaging conversation with someone so juvenile

I would absolutely say something. I don’t know what’s wrong with some people, they seem to resort to blocking rather than to be able to handle a basic disagreement. She needs to surely realise that if she’s falling out with your DH its likely a sibling argument and something she should be able to handle?

I guess best to go into it softly but I wouldn’t feel comfortable letting her look after my child again if she keeps doing it.

Well, if she hadn't have blocked you, you would have contacted her. Which she didn't want.

I'd shrug my shoulders. They'll either sort it out or not and I'd find out if it were sorted eventually.

Has the behaviour always been this ?

A family member does this to me & my sisters when ever she falls out with my Dad.

Her children block us also.

Myself and my sisters are never involved and have asked her multiple times to please not do this, it’s nothing to do with us and we still want to talk.

I got sick of it and have cut her and her children off for good, life is better.

I wouldn’t do either.

Just take a giant step back and stop seeing much of her beyond the odd fabulous get together.

Personally I wouldn’t say anything, but I would be disengaging from the relationship. I wouldn’t be sending cute videos to someone who behaves thag ridiculously.

How are they arguing so often at their age. Do they maybe need to spend less time together?

I’d probably not bother with her at all if she was repeatedly blocking and unblocking me. Couldn't be arsed with an adult behaving like a reactive teen

I'd just block her back

I would consider telling her that your DD made a special video for her but strangely you’re unable to sent it to her

She's immature and self-centered. Do you really want to waste precious time worrying about her latest snit? I'd block her back.

Thanks all for the replies. It's very immature and I agree, I will take a huge step back because it's pathetic for her to behave this way. Especially as DD constantly asks to video call her. If we video call in laws, she'll ask to speak her and my MIL will say "ah sorry she's out/oh sorry she's in the shower/oh she's asleep sorry" - probably as she doesn't want to say hello to me so avoids DD

Don't bother doing anything for her in the future. She doesn't deserve the effort of a video message from her neice. She's immature for blocking you after she agreed to watch your child when you were in labour. At least you know not to trust or rely on her in future.

Even if she and your husband make up, I would take a step back and leave them to it. If he wants to organise birthday messages/cards/presents he can but you shouldn't put in the effort for her.

I'd be tempted to ask a few family member if she has changed her number or if her phone is broken. Your daughter wanted to send her a birthday video but you couldn't get through. Lay on the faux confusion and how disappointed your daughter was.

@Bivarb yes definitely. I will make a point about how upset DD was because she hasn't done anything wrong and it's beyond me how you can ignore a child like that who has nothing but love for you especially knowing she asks after you everytime we video call

I completely stop contacting her from now on. Avoid even mentioning her, especially to your DD. Polite but don’t get involved.

It’s really rude because it’s like they’re assuming you would keep contacting them against their wishes. I would say something about that

Wow. Staggeringly immature behaviour. As someone else said, let her crack on - and don't feed her clear hunger for drama.

If someone blocks you on android you don't actually know - there's no "you have been blocked" message when you try to send something. What happens is the messages get sent to a virtual inbox and that persons phone is banned from recieving them. So the messages still get sent but never get seen at the other end.

I'm curious how you know you are blocked when you tried to send a message? Is this specific to iPhone because android wouldn't tell you that.

Yep will let her crack on. Won't be inviting her over or going over there anymore (she lives with MIL/FIL) i'd rather not go there and then be ignored in person infront of the kids. Even if she unblocks me now it's too late

Just cut her off. I think some people do a big drama over nothing and just expect everyone to be there when they have got over their strop. Don't be there.

@Switcherooza when the person's display picture disappears, and you can no longer see a status i.e. "Available" or "Busy" and then when you message them and it only has 1 tick for days it usually means they blocked you or changed their number - which she hasn't. My MIL admitted she's blocked me and DH when we mentioned the video message not being sent

Oh I thought the DH was her DH. Your brother. Maybe she blocks you so he can’t message her on your phone

My Ex SIL did this too. Just ignore, it's an attention seeking thing IMO