My god the bickering 🤯

[MuggleMe]

3 weeks til the kids (girls 9 and 6) go back to school and my mental health is actually really suffering 😣 9yo has ASD and is either controlling, insufferably rude or downright nasty to her little sister. They argue so much ive given up breaking up the arguments and gone for a scream a couple of times. She plays the victim/gets really upset if I pull her up on it, I wish I was dead, you don't want me in the family etc.

It was 6yos birthday today and she went out of her way to spoil it, saying I hope it's the worst day ever and just being really jealous of the attention. I do care about her, and love her, and know she is genuinely struggling, but the way it plays out is terrible for everyone else. I just don't know how to balance her mental health vs everyone else's.

But anyway, I wanted reassurance that I'm not the only one with feral/nightmare kids this summer, as I keep seeing children who seem to actually like each other and are kind and giving to each other.

And as balance, they can play nice sometimes and DD9 can be sweet sometimes.

I’m with you. Around 9/10 is where girls can start to get nasty. You have to stomp on it. hard.

and divide and conquer. Send them to different summer camps if you can.

Oh I so relate to you. My DD's are very similar ages and the eldest also has ASD.
The younger one gets jealous and spoils things every time DD1 gets something that she perceives to be more attention. Will be worse next week as DD1 turns 9.
DD1 on the other hand is rude and controlling and isn't sleeping well meaning that no one else does either. Any criticism at her ends in 'I just wish you'd never had me/I wasn't born/you don't love me'.
Can't wait for them to go back to school!
Hang in there and sending solidarity!

Oh god I hear you! We’re on holiday right now in Greece with DD9 and DS6 and the bickering is driving me insane. Same shit, different country except we’ve paid £££ for the privilege!

DD has thrown a screaming strop over something different every day so far - today’s was about not wanting to go to the beach a 10-minute walk from the hotel. We’ve tried encouraging her to do some of the (free) activities on offer but she has turned her nose up at everything so far. I’m just glad it’s an AI resort and I can knock back the rosé to try and stay sane!

My boys are driving me to distraction, so much so that I'm actually dreading the few days away we have booked next week. What's the point? 12 and 5 years old, and they just can't do anything together. I can't bare it.

This is when having separate bedrooms is great. Once they start bickering they get sent to their own room until you have finished your cup of tea in peace and quiet...then find the biggest mug you can 😂

Mine are the same. I can honestly understand why some animals eat their young. Hang in there. Xxxxxxx

Mine are adults now and I still remember that stage.

"Muuuum! He's looking at me!"

I have found my people! This week I’ve resorted to paying them in actual cash not to fight. 2 days in and it’s working so far.

Pretty sure it’s what the books would recommend.

To which the other responds by repeating, (in a whiny voice) 'Mum he's looking at me me' and every response from the the first complainer is responded to by repeating it - Including 'stop copying meeeeee'.

And mine are in their 40s now.

Those that can, try asking your parents, I'm pretty sure most all of you, were as bad, at least some of the time.

I hear you! My DH always wanted to book holidays for the beginning of the school
summer hols but I insisted on the end as by then I’d be demented and the kids gone feral. Not so bad now they’re 15 and 17 but still hardwork.

Bickering kids can be really hellish! You have my utmost sympathy.

I am really struggling with mine this 6 weeks holidays. I usually love them being off but the arguing and fighting is really getting me down!

This had me laughing at least 😂 dh and I regularly joke about drowning/offing one or both of them and sadly agree the paperwork is too much bother.

I think the 9yo gets in a negative spiral she finds it hard to get out of. She was actually a sweetie this evening, giggling in the bath together (she had stopped joint baths but fancied it for once) and heartfelt apology. But it doesn't last.

I had to tell DD off for annoying her brother by wearing his pants for the whole weekend and telling him how comfy they were. FFS

Oh keep em coming, this had me in stitches. If you don't laugh you cry!

It's mostly the arguments that just don't go anywhere. You're laughing at me, no I'm not, yes you are, no I'm not (with crying/wingeing), yes you are with shouting, possible hair pulling. Aaarg.

Didn't hate the fact that grandparents had them for 2 days and got proper terrible behavior for one of them. They're even more sympathetic now!

We get “He’s breathing too loud!” or her other favourite “He touched my stuff and now I have to wash it!”

A few times this holiday I’ve made an actual rule about which sofa seat each child sits on, and clarified that no part of their body whatsoever, not even a hair, may cross the cushion line…

DS5 gets cross when DS9 looks out 'his' car window, sigh.

This made me laugh...I do exactly the same thing. They have a sofa in the playroom and the line of stitches through the middle of it is the dividing line 😂

Honestly I’ve had to stop arguments about them “looking at each other”; mine desperately need some space from each other (or at least I do)

My two year old twins are currently having an almighty row over who gets to flush their own 💩in the toilet

I can imagine twins can really swing from best friends forever to arch enemies in a second!