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Original poster

bunkbed dilemma

20 replies

Lcw29 · 14/08/2023 19:19

My son is nearly 6 and had a bunkbed with slide. It's about a year old and his younger brother sleeps at the bottom. I thought this was fine until I spoke to him tonight. He's been having meltdowns at bedtime. He has possible autism. He now says that his bed is too high and he wants his old pirate bed back. (He grew out of it) he's scared at night time of the dark, but doesn't like bright lights either and hates heights. I had no idea abd this bed doesn't separate. What do I do? It wasn't cheap so can't just get rid. Ideas welcome!!

OP posts:
coodawoodashooda · 14/08/2023 19:20

He sleeps on the bottom?

YourNameGoesHere · 14/08/2023 19:22

How high is it and how old is his brother can't he swap and sleep on the bottom?

Marblessolveeverything · 14/08/2023 19:24

Sell the bed and replace it with two budget singles. You may find something on Facebook and reuse the current mattresses? You can't have his sleep impacted by a fear.

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Hellsbellsandspidersankles · 14/08/2023 19:31

You can’t force your child to sleep in a bed that scares him because it “wasn’t cheap”. How is that his problem?

YallaYallaaa · 14/08/2023 19:31

You can’t make him sleep up there - imagine how horrible it would be to be scared of your own bed. That’s where you should feel most safe.

As well as the options PP have given, do you have space to put the mattress on the floor and he sleeps there for a bit? He might change his mind in a while / or his brother gets big enough to go up.

BrutusMcDogface · 14/08/2023 19:32

I’m assuming the younger brother is too young for the top bunk?

CyberCritical · 14/08/2023 19:36

Selling and replacing is an option but I would try bottom bunk and a nightlight attached to the frame, you can get nightlights that just let out a low glow.

FortofPud · 14/08/2023 19:36

Yes, as pps said, you could put his mattress on the floor for sleep and put a cheap mattress up there, maybe he could play up there with no pressure and the fear might gradually dissipate. If it did then he could eventually move back up (don't tell him that though!). Set a time limit on the whole thing and then sell the bed if you have to.

Cloudsandrainnotsunandsand · 14/08/2023 19:47

Can the mattress live under the bottom bunk and pulled out at bedtime? Until younger dc can use the top bunk....

Original poster
Lcw29 · 14/08/2023 19:49

I've put him on a blow up bed tonight. His brother is too young. He's 3. It's a short bunkbed and he plays on it fine . He's been fine for months then the last 4 months he's been weird at bedtime.

OP posts:
Marblessolveeverything · 14/08/2023 21:57

This lines up with development stage, mine went from an absolute date devil to a professional risk assessor. I hope you get sorted soon.

lopeloo · 14/08/2023 22:02

We had bunkbeds which separated into 2 singles. Even if your bunkbed wasn't designed to separate, you could probably turn it into 2 singles with a saw? Although it might be a shame to wreck an expensive bed.

DanceMumTaxi · 14/08/2023 22:13

Could you try the 3 year old on the top if it’s not high? Do you think they’d try and climb out?

DanceMumTaxi · 14/08/2023 22:14

Otherwise the only alternative is to sell the bunkbed and buy singles. Can you fit singles?

Haretest · 14/08/2023 22:15

Take top mattress off and put it on the floor and see if he wants to go back up in time

Blueskies121 · 14/08/2023 22:21

I have a GroLight night light that my two use as they don't like the dark. It isn't bright.

Original poster
Lcw29 · 15/08/2023 01:53

I've seen a light I'm going to get to at least try and solve that issue. I could see if sleeping on the temp bed helps first as he seems to chop and change his mind alot. I've also thought about those bed tent things you can get from ikea. Just a simple small one to make him feel more secure at night. I'll talk about it with him some more either way. Thanks for all the suggestions. If he really does hate the bunk we'll have to separate the beds...might ask a friend who's a carpenter to do it tho lol

OP posts:
Yfory · 15/08/2023 02:00

Rather than separate them (which may wreck them if they were designed to always be one structure) you might do better to dismantle them and sell them. And then start over with a solution thats more flexible.

DiscoBeat · 15/08/2023 02:35

We tried bunk beds for a while when they were too little to have separate rooms and we found they both preferred being near ground level, so we split them. If money is tight then a second hand set of splittable bunkbeds would be good (sell the other two) then you have the option of putting them back if they change their minds. You could get creative with pirate themed bedding and flags!

birdsongismyfave · 16/08/2023 08:03

My 5.5 year old is having a phase about not sleeping on the top bunk. So she's just sharing the bottom one with her sister until she feels like going back up.

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