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Original poster

Scared senseless about driving new car

21 replies

cheerioagain · 03/08/2023 15:08

My old car gave up so I’ve part exchanged it recently for a new one. Same make of car. I’ve been driving four years and in all the time I’ve been driving I have only driven one car. The new one was expensive - I was terrified throughout the test drive and felt so shaky afterwards but knew it was wonderful to drive and a good fit, so bought it. I was also terrified all the way home from the garage and now I have a splitting headache from the tension and stress of it. It’s more the actual control of the car - clearly I can do it but I feel far less confident in it. I am also likely undiagnosed autistic and I hate change so this will also play into it no doubts

Will I get used to it? It’s so responsive because it’s only a few years old. I feel like a learner again. I know under-confident drivers can be dangerous too. I have driven it normally today but I just feel sick about the thought of crashing it given how expensive it was. Buying another of my previous car wasn’t possible as they stopped making them donkeys years ago & it was too small.

OP posts:

Maxaluna · 03/08/2023 15:13

Do whatever you need to do to feel confident before driving- read the manual, watch videos etc to become familiar with any new features the new car has.

Go out in the car at quieter times, when you don't need to be anywhere at a certain time (e.g. not for an appointment).

If you know of any quietish car parks nearby, e.g. large retail parks sometimes have areas that are less popular, go there and practice parking. Start parking, get out and look at your car's position, continue, check again etc.

Original poster

cheerioagain · 03/08/2023 15:20

Maxaluna · 03/08/2023 15:13

Do whatever you need to do to feel confident before driving- read the manual, watch videos etc to become familiar with any new features the new car has.

Go out in the car at quieter times, when you don't need to be anywhere at a certain time (e.g. not for an appointment).

Thank you, we’ve got a retail park like that near. Might go and try in it. Just worried I will crash but think a lot of it is anxiety too

OP posts:

VenusClapTrap · 03/08/2023 15:23

You just need lots of practice. It’s fairly normal to feel like that. You’ll relax eventually when you’ve got used to it.

Aquamarine1029 · 03/08/2023 15:26

Op, it's just a car. You have insurance. It feels different because it's newer and you'll get used to that in the blink of eye. You're a good driver, just relax and get on with it. These feelings will be gone before you know it.

MonsterCalling · 03/08/2023 15:27

If you type the make and model into YouTube you will likely find lots of detailed videos going through all of the features etc which will help to familiarise you with the cabin.

billyt · 03/08/2023 16:27

Firstly, I'd just sit in the car. Get used to how it feels. It may be the same make but there will be many differences between models. Make sure your seat is in the best, most comfortable position. Make yourself familiar with where each button and control is.

Take it for a few trips around your locality, get comfortable with the brakes, gear changes etc. As said, find a quiet area and practise parking up, reversing, pulling away.

You will get used to it and look back in amazement.

Go for it.

YourCrackersMiLord · 03/08/2023 16:29

Will I get used to it?

Yes - and surprisingly quickly.

CornedBeef451 · 03/08/2023 16:33

You will get used to it but I know how you feel!

I changed my car from an old Picasso I'd had for years to a Renault Capture.

In theory it's the same size (I checked dimensions before buying) but it feels much bigger as I'm much higher up than I'm used to.

It took me a while but I love it now, can't imagine driving anything else.

Currently driving it down very, very tiny roads in Cornwall and I'm glad the newness (to me) has worn off as I've had to be practically in the hedges to let other cars past.

Chipsahoy · 03/08/2023 16:37

Oh I had to reply because I have been driving twenty years and lots of cars. But in last ten years just one car. Lately I’ve had to drive two different cars and likely another soon as mine may be a write off.
I have a lot of anxiety due to past trauma and I was an absolute wreck for a week as I got used to my husbands car. Honestly I had a full on melt down about it.
Muscle memory in your car makes it second nature. It’s totally normal to feel apprehensive and even very anxious. Lots of driving. Lots and lot. Places you know. Comfortable empty routes when you can. Park it as much as you can.

It does get better very very quickly

Changeforachange · 03/08/2023 16:45

You will get used to it and it won't feel new forever. I say this as someone who's driven a lot of different cars over a fairly short period.

First time I drove a SUV I felt like I was driving a bus (it was only a little Vauxhall Mokka!) and I was terrified.
Now it's second nature.

All new cars take some getting used to & then hopefully you will be able to enjoy it.

LightSpeeds · 03/08/2023 16:56

I always find it tricky with a new car. I just drive it round for half an hour (on quiet roads) while I get used to the pedals, controls, gear, etc. That's usually enough to get me to a comfortable place with it.

Original poster

cheerioagain · 03/08/2023 17:10

Thank you everyone, I’ll take some of these tips on board. I definitely think I’ll read through the manual

OP posts:

Original poster

cheerioagain · 04/08/2023 07:55

It’s raining today - I know I should just drive the car but I’ve got a 5 mile trip to take and would worry less on the bus. I just want to practise as per suggestions. Am I being silly though? Being rained on isn’t great!

OP posts:

Rainbowx90 · 04/08/2023 08:03

I was feeling a bit like this when I bought my new car.
Went from a little 4 door hatchback to an SUV and I bought it online so didn't see how big it was when it was delivered to me!
I just thought, sod it, it's mine now, I'll have to get used to it (old car was a write off due to a car accident)
As scary as it was I love my car now and it didn't take long to get used to.
The longer you wait without driving it the more anxious you'll be.
Jump in the car and enjoy the new car feeling!

CrotchetyQuaver · 04/08/2023 11:39

You will get used to it I'm sure. I am in my 50's, never used to have a problem with different cars but that's changed as I've got older. I had to upgrade my horse transport from a trailer to a small lorry about the size of a supermarket delivery van. The first few times I had to give myself a bit of a talking to first before I set off (which often made me late) but after a few weeks, it was fine. I'm sure the more you drive it, the easier it will get.

Jujubes5 · 04/08/2023 11:45

Yes, the more you drive the better you get.
try to get out everyday.

OvaHere · 04/08/2023 12:13

cheerioagain · 04/08/2023 07:55

You just need to do it before it becomes bigger in your head than it is in reality.

I bought a new car earlier in the year. Very different to my old car. I made DH drive it back from the showroom because traffic was bad and it felt too much to get to grips with in rush hour. Due to his work he's always swapped vehicles quite frequently so unfamiliar cars don't bother him.

Once the traffic calmed down later on I did drive to a friends house in order to just dive in and do it. I'd say it felt a bit strange for about a fortnight and I drove more cautiously in that time but since then I've developed the requisite muscle memory and now it's just my car.

Aquamarine1029 · 04/08/2023 12:22

cheerioagain · 04/08/2023 07:55

Yes, you're being very silly and you are not doing yourself any favours. It's five miles, that's nothing. You know how to drive, drive your car. You're making this into a "thing" when it isn't one. Anxiety can be a real bitch but you can't allow it to control you.

Rubyupbeat · 04/08/2023 13:10

Once you have driven it a few times you will be fine, everyone is the same, its nothing to do with autism.

FooFighter99 · 04/08/2023 18:52

I know how you feel OP. I got my new car 04/07 and I’m still nervous about driving it because it’s so much bigger than my last car 😬 I’m slowly getting more used to it and my confidence is growing

just take your time and you’ll be fine

BarelyLiterate · 04/08/2023 19:09

Practice makes perfect, so get up really early on a Sunday morning when the weather is good (obviously don’t drink the night before) & just go for a drive for a few hours while the roads are quiet.
Find a retail or business park & just drive round it. Practice manoeuvring, reversing, three point turns, parking etc etc. Find a dual carriageway, put your foot down up to the speed limit & get used to the acceleration. If there’s nobody around behind you, use the brakes a bit harder & get used to how that feels. Find a hill & do a few hill starts. Find a country lane & use it to get used to how the car corners. Then stop off at a drive through & reward yourself with a treat.
By the time you get back you will be much more confident with your new wheels. Good luck!

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