If your children get lost….

[MattDillonsEyebrows]

Do you have a contingency in place for if your children get lost?
I have always told mine to find someone official (police officer or life guard) or if there’s no one around to find someone with children and tell them you’re lost.

I also taught them my phone number this year so they can get someone to call me. They’re 7 & 6 and from chatting to friends, this seems a rare thing to do. But to me it seems obvious.

so I guess my question is, do your children know your phone number and have you told them what to do if they can’t find you when out?

I've told my dc to find another mum with children and tell them they're lost.

Yes! Mine are 9 and 7. They know to stand still if lost and that we will come and find them. Failing this to go into a shop and ask someone who works in the shop for help and to stay together if they are both there.
9 year old knows our phone numbers.
I have also told them not to go with anyone except family members or two specific close friends.

I really need to do this with my 4 year old. Thanks OP!

Mine are only 2 and 5, but I've told my 5 year old many times to find a mummy if they're lost. But in reality, at that age, I really don't think it would matter.

My 5 year old has been lost 3 times on outgoings; he has a tendency to wander. One time he was found by a member of public and taken to customer services. The other time, I found him crying around a group of adults, none of whom appeared to be helping him.

Realistically, most young children will cry and wander around aimlessly until anyone helps. I don't think they'd reject a man approaching and I think it would be quite normal for them to freeze and just do what they're told.

I've contemplated GPS ankle bracelets etc but haven't got round to buying them yet.

surely you teach them to stand still if lost, not to go wondering about?

I taught mine to stand still, and not to go with anybody, instead, if anyone spoke to them say " I will wait here, please go and find a police officer for me"

I also taught them to shout loudly " help! I don't know this person!" if anyone tried to take them away, and kick hard, aiming at shins and genitals.

In 20 years of raising children, this emergency procedure was only used twice, and worked, both times ( the standing still and asking for a police officer to be fetched, there was never any attempted abduction)

Mine (8 and 9) know:
my phone number
their address
to go to a family, or female if nobody more official around
to shout my/their dads first name if lost in a crowd/public place, rather than mum or dad - so we can hear them better/faster

We also arrange one central spot to meet if lost, if we are somewhere large and not likely to be able to see each other (like a specific signpost in a national trust place, a specific ride in a theme park)

Mine are 6 and 9. They know my phone number (practice it regularly) and they know to stay together and find a woman who works in a shop. 2nd choice is a woman with children. They have recently asked why they need to ask a woman. I said that some people are safer than others and science (statistics) tells us the woman are often safer than men.

Until mine were old enough for phones, when going to big, busy or unfamiliar places I would write my phone number on their upper arm underneath the T-shirt sleeve line so that they could show someone without having the stress of trying to remember it in exceptional circumstances.

They know my mobile and my husbands mobile, their address and Daddy’s grown up name (full) and where he works. They are to approach a mummy with children or ask the person at the checkout for help. I take a photo of them before we go which is really so I remember what they’re wearing. They’re big now though it’s just I had lots of very little ones.

I tried to teach my phone number from a young age and told them it's on their coat and where to find it. Unfortunately when my ds got lost he didn't think to check. They have been told to stay where they are and ask another mummy for help or someone who works there, shopping centre security. In our local shopping centre they know where the customer service desk is.

They both know me and DH's phone number.

They ask a person in a uniform for help, if unavailable, a woman.

My DD is 6 and I told her the same thing and I made sure my three year old knows that he should tell someone my full name if he’s lost. I’m surprised that’s rare. I also told my DC to stay where they are if they can’t see me and not wander off looking for me. Same when they go on school trips I tell them what to do if they can’t see anyone

I think STAND STILL! is the most important thing a lost child can do

I taught mine my full name and phone number and address and when one kid was really small got separated from me in a supermarket and was able to go find a "safe adult" (it was a security guard). He told them my name and they called for me on the tannoy. I was so relieved!

We talked about who to ask for help - namely police officer, shop assistant, mum with children.

Good point about getting them to shout out your name rather than mum or dad.

Same here. Taught them my, DH and their gran’s numbers and said they must ask a policeman, or a shopkeeper.

Yes, like you - stand still or ask someone in uniform (so could be a security guard in a shopping centre).
We didn't have mobiles when mine were little, but once we did, they memorised my number.
I read a good tip on here that you can write your mobile on your dc's arm if you are out for the day.
Also things like when you are on the beach, set yourself up directly in front of something obvious that anyone can see when they look up, then walk down, away from where you are and show them, specifically, and tell them what it is called.
Another tip I read on here when you are out for the day, take a photo of them in what they are wearing that day - you have an instant and accurate image for anyone looking out for them

Sew in name labels with my phone number in their coat. Also useful if they lose the coat, but they have been told to go into the nearest shop and ask the staff to call the number in their coat.

When DC was too small to remember my phone number, I’d write it on his arm if we went on a daytrip. He’s memorised it since around age 3/4.

When we go somewhere new I’ll often say “if we can’t find each other, come back to this shop and wait for me here and ask the staff to call me”

In general the instructions are to find someone, preferably a woman, who is at work and ask them to call me.

Told DS(8) to stay where he has realised he has got separated from us and not go wandering off. Failing that, to go into a big shop nearby and go to the checkout and tell them he is lost and can they contact security /police, or find a woman with a pram. He knows his address but we should teach him our mobile numbers. I figure a big shop is likely to have CCTV, but it’s not that often police are walking the streets these days so I’d rather he went into a shop than wander around looking for a police officer.

He also has strict instructions not to walk off with anyone even if they say they will take him somewhere safe to call mum/dad. Told him he has our full approval to kick up a massive fuss/scream blue murder if anyone tries to force him to go with him, including older children and not just adults.

How do you know the other mum wants more kids? 😜

scream what though? Children scream all the time. Teach him to scream "I don't know this person"

It depends on where they are when they get lost. In a shop they'd go to a cashier; in a shopping centre they'd go into the nearest shop and to a cashier; at a festival they'd go to an official in a high-vis vest.

Mine have phones now so can ring me and we make sure they have enough charge before we go anywhere.

I put my phone number on a sticker inside all of DS' shoes. He knows that if he's lost to find an adult and tell them "my mummy's phone number is in my shoe". He's 4 now, and has been able to recite this from 3. He also can with reasonable reliability tell his address. I wouldn't trust him currently to remember a phone number. We also discuss what to do on public transport if he's separated. I tend to go over it with him casually about once a month now?

I've always taught mine to stay where they are and we will find them.

This is what I teach my own children and children I take away with school. It's easier for us to retrace steps than for them to wander off and get more lost.