If you were the perfect housewife..

[Mothermotherd]

..who had your whole life together and we’re prepared for every scenario, what would you keep on hand for guests? (Of course, no self respecting woman would ever turn up unannounced!) A particular brand of biscuits? Chocolates? A dedicated bottle of posh pop in the fridge?

And if you are going to grumble that you’re much too busy and they’d get the stale biscuits from the back of the cupboard, bore off - this thread isn’t for you 😁

I'm not so no idea.

The coconut ones that are gluten free, vegan, taste amazing and look posh, plus something like Viscounts I'm case they don't like coconut.
Fancy cordial and fancy flavoured sparkling water. Range of tea types and coffee, decaf and caff. Alt options for milk.

Fresh bread out of the bread maker that morning. Fancy filling from the artisan market I'd frequent, where I also got the love desserts. Obv depends howl omg you're staying.

None. I can’t be trusted not to eat them.

Keep frozen cookies on hand, they cook quickly while you're making the tea/coffee, they taste delicious, they last ages because they're frozen, the guest feels special because you've gone to some effort for them, the house smells nice - there's no downside.

I am far from the perfect housewife, alas.

But I do always have a bottle of champagne chilling in the fridge for a celebration - and sometimes very minor celebrations count!

Frozen cookies is genius

A home made cake beautifully presented uncut to slice once in front of them so they get the first slice.

Oh I didn't realise you'd been round our house @SleepingStandingUp

I was going to suggest frozen scones or croissants. All the appearance of effort without any effort.

I think fundamentally that guests get what is normal for us.

I do have a cupboard full of tea/coffee fruit tea, decaf etc, because we regularly have meetings at our house and then everyone is catered for.

But I put out biscuits if that is what we have or delicious home made cake if that is what we have and I don't really buy in specially for guests.
We have a basic winde rack so can always open a bottle.

If I'm doing a meal that's different, would need to go shopping.

My dream is to have a shelf in a cupboard with a pretty tea tray ready laid with cups, saucers, spoons, the sugar bowl, a milk jug, tea pot, cafetière etc.

And in this dream, I bake something every other day so always have something homemade and fresh on hand.

In reality, we definitely have a sugar bowl but I don’t know where it is. We don’t have any biscuits or cake unless I have at least 3 hours notice of guests so I can run to the supermarket for some random bickies.

And I also need a few hours of cleaning before I open the front door to anyone too.

I always have a couple of bottles of Moet at the back of the fridge. I blame Jilly Cooper.

I am by no means a perfect housewife but we always have:

Tea, coffee (including decaf) and herbal teas.
Champagne in fridge.
Packet of biscuits and a big bag of crisps in the cupboard.

Most of my friends that pop round want the crisps and fizz, it's how I know we were meant to be friends 😂😂🍾

I always have a bottle of fizz in the fridge, savoury snacks and food in the freezer for the air fryer.

No sweet stuff like biscuits, my friends and family aren’t tea kinda gals! 😂

Most of my friends that pop round want the crisps and fizz, it's how I know we were meant to be friends 😂😂🍾

😂 x-post

I’m not a housewife (or anywhere near perfect) but I have a simple fruit bread recipe that I put in the bead maker so that it comes out warm when guests arrive. (Only works with arranged guests)

Impromptu guests could have warm rock buns as they take only 10 mins to prep while you’re chatting and putting the kettle on.

I can admit to being on the slightly obsessive end of the housekeeping spectrum, but I always aim to have my house in a state that the queen could drop in and I wouldn't be embarrassed.
Front room and loo always clean and tidy, shoes and coats always put away in the cupboard immediately, homemade cake or biscuits always available, fizz in the fridge, ice in the freezer, nice tea in the cupboard.

I'm definitely NOT a perfect housewife! But if I was (and if I was loaded)...I'd have on hand:
-a selection of different drinks (juices, cold drinks, wines, beers, aperitifs, and different hot drinks).
-different cakes, biscuits, scones, preserves, a good cheese/charcuterie board.
-a spotless and tidy house.

I do have meals that I've prepped/cooked and frozen though. So if someone did show up unexpectedly, they'd always be able to share in a good, home made meal. I don't really have any alcohol in the house (a bottle of cooking wine and a couple of cans of non-alcoholic lager). I have lots of tea and coffee though :D

I LOVE the idea of frozen cookies!!

I think this is really interesting, because if I went round to your house and you served tea in little tea cups and saucers on a try like this I would not feel welcome.
To me, being welcome is a large steaming mug of tea, usually sitting round the kitchen table.

I am mor einterested in someone feelign at home than in elegant looking tea trays.

My auntie was always ready to whip up fresh scones at a moment's notice.

My dreams definitely don’t match reality. In my dreams, I’d also be living in a country pile or a city townhouse and there would be staff serving us.

In reality, if you were to visit me, you’d be warned that the dining chairs are about to collapse and we’d be sharing the sofa with the pets. Don’t trip over any toys on your way over there.

That said, I don’t think that ‘elegance’ (your word, not mine) is automatically off putting or unwelcoming. That would come from the person, not the tea china.

I'm definitely not a perfect housewife - someone else does my cleaning and I don't cook or iron. I made a pie once - hard as a tortoise. The last cake I baked was in 1985!

I am, however, a bit obsessive about tea and I like to serve guests from a bone china teapot and give them silver teaspoons, bone china cups, saucers and tea plates. Hardly anyone takes sugar these days but I put sugar cubes into a bowl with silver tongs. The milk is in a bone china jug and I provide linen napkins and silver cake forks and the cakes are home-made (just not in my home). I buy them from the WI cake stall. If it's guests I don't often see, I like to spoil them with a proper cream tea and use a three tier cake stand with tiny sandwiches on the bottom, fancy cakes in the middle and scones on top.

It's the only 'housewifey' thing I do well and I enjoy it.

Gin and tonic. Maybe a slice of lemon if they're nice guests.

With a couple of hours notice, I’d make my usual - a sandwich cake with blackcurrant jam. Freshly made, can’t beat it. Always v popular.
Not keen on biscuits or scones TBH.

Meh, if you're coming round, we're going out!
What I offer is excellent knowledge of all local places to eat & drink.
You're my guest, so the bill's on me 😀