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Do you know anyone with Zero online presence?

151 replies

Window82 · 01/08/2023 10:01

That’s my question? My DH was like this until he had to set up a LinkedIn account for work, he also has a profile now on his work website. But no Social media.

I have a profile on my work website and also have Instagram and Facebook.

The only person I can think of is my Nan as she’s illiterate and her life is very basic. She is aware of things like social media from watching the television but she also speaks little English so has a very sheltered life.

I was trying to track down my old neighbour’s daughter to contact her and found nothing online. Also an old university friend who is a solicitor and I can she’s on the roll but I can’t find her on her firm website.

I can usually find out a lot about people straightaway (e.g. new prospective clients) because of their online profiles but some people have zero presence!

I have a client who works in IT he has zero presence out of choice! I find that really interesting. He said he’d rather there was nothing about him available online.

OP posts:
Starlitexpress · 01/08/2023 10:47

One friend who has no online presence and one that doesn't even have WhatsApp!

Alarae · 01/08/2023 10:48

My sister, although she did previously.

She deleted everything when someone was basically trying to attack her through any means possible (via work, social media, friends etc) as they thought she had 'stolen her boyfriend' (she hadn't- they had broken up a while ago but he was helping his ex out as they shared a child).

Should caveat that she does lurk via Facebook/TikTok but under a fake profile. Mainly so she can watch stupid videos!

snumpy · 01/08/2023 10:52

Both my in laws never had an online presence themselves. Never owned a computer, laptop or mobile phone. They only had internet as they had Sky TV. Their family looked after their day to day affairs and had given permission to deal with things like gas bills etc. They were more than happy for them to do this. I don't think dfil had ever used a cash machine.

ModestMoon · 01/08/2023 10:54

I know quite a few people who don't have online presence in their own name.

taxguru · 01/08/2023 10:56

Neither myself nor OH have any online presence at all. Nothing anywhere to identify us, no photos, nothing, zilch, nada. He has a facebook account with a fake user name so that he can join local facebook groups and his special interest/hobby groups, but doesn't post anything - he's definitely "read only". The nearest we have is our names are on the Companies House register as we're directors of our limited company (but not our home address), but otherwise, nothing, not on the public voting register either and not in directory enquiries. We don't even have our names on our business website - it's completely anonymous except via the Co House directory. Anyone wanting to find us (i.e. long lost friends/relatives etc) would really struggle.

We've managed to persuade our DS to have minimal SM/internet presence too. He does all the usual twitter, facebook, instagram, whatsapp etc etc but has his privacy settings as high as they can go and limits his SM to specific friends and groups, etc., so again, I think anyone outside of his friend circle would struggle to find him - we've looked at his twitter and facebook accounts and access is very limited and there was nothing showing publicly other than basic generic stuff. When he was at Uni, the careers office advised him to set up a linkedin account which they thought would help with job hunting, so he's done that, and now he's got a job, his employers (blue chip firm) asked him to update his linkedin with his new job, job title, employer, etc., which he's done, but it's all very professional and there is quite a lot in the employee handbook about not bringing himself/employer into disrepute with SM posts which apparently is a disciplinary offence! His Uni careers advisor was adamant he should be very careful with what he posted on SM because potential employers would search him out and anything "out of the ordinary" could scupper his chances, i.e. extreme politics, anything other than "normal/average" partying photos, etc. (some of his job applications required him to enter his SM user names for each platform etc so they could check him out!).

Me and OH have nothing to hide, we're just very private people and hate any kind of attention. We also "compartmentalise" our lives, so my work colleagues don't know my hobbies/interests nor my family - "never the twain shall meet" is our motto!

I think having zero/minimal online presence is a lot more common than people think. Over the years, I've certainly tried to track down a few old school friends and a couple of old boyfriends (just for nosiness/interest really) and found no trace at all. I know OH has also tried to find some of his old friends and old work colleagues and not got anywhere either. We're hardly ancient, both in our 50s, and both been into computers/progamming/gaming etc since the 80s and some of our long lost friends/colleagues were also well into IT and computers, but, like us, they clearly aren't into being "out there" on SM.

RattleRattle · 01/08/2023 10:59

This reply has been deleted

This user is a goady troll so we've removed their posts.

Brokendaughter · 01/08/2023 10:59

Most of the people I know have a very low to no social media presence.

A few have a closed profile used to be in a couple of private groups if at all, usually from a few years back & unused with no photos or personal information.

My kids have no social media.
You wouldn't know they exist & can't find a photo as none have ever been posted.

They are happy that they got/get to be kids without having their lives plastered on the internet for people to find.
The one who is an adult has chosen to continue without one.
It was actually seen as a bonus in his career.

Mutabiliss · 01/08/2023 11:00

Yes, loads. My mum refuses to have anything to do with it, and none of my older aunts/uncles are on it (70+). I have friends who are teachers or work in risky jobs who have either no presence or fake and very limited profiles. My best mate used to be on it but deleted everything a few years ago. I would say most of my friends have massively reduced their presence from a few years ago. Not paranoid, just less interested - maybe because we're in our 40s and all the nights out and weddings are long since over 😂

I only really go on here (sporadically), Insta for my hobby and Twitter for politics.

dullandgrey · 01/08/2023 11:00

Me. No social media at all. I only have MN and I'm contemplating removing this also.. spending too much time on it. Like, right now Blush

Amazongirl9 · 01/08/2023 11:03

Also have a friend who has lost friends because she can’t resist posting every minute of every day online so they know if they go out with her they are going to wind up on her Facebook account.

WannaBeRecluse · 01/08/2023 11:04

My 20 year old has no online presence.

Northernsoullover · 01/08/2023 11:07

My mum my fiance don't have social media. I am on LinkedIn but everything else is fake names and no profile pic. I know that's not what you asked though.
Every morning I delete my past history off Facebook when my memories show up. I really used to post some shite which makes me cringe 😂

ohtowinthelottery · 01/08/2023 11:11

My DB. It's mildly annoying as the only way to contact him is by phone/text (no whatsapp or messenger either) and he hasn't got a clue what's going on in the family. Would love him to see holiday photos etc but CBA emailing them to him so I feel he misses out on so much.

Manicule · 01/08/2023 11:15

My DH. He’s not interested and doesn’t see the point in it. He’s actively against the idea of being tracked on social media (he’s not one of those obsessive loons who thinks we’re all being monitored by giant lizards or whatever, he’s just very private).

LaMaG · 01/08/2023 11:17

Me!! Except mumnet which I joined a few months ago, until then I never knew what people were doing on their phones! My cousins live all over and use Facebook so sometimes I do feel like I miss a bit of news but that's all. I couldn't give a shit about what someone's kids birthday cake looked like or other nonsense people post. I have a lot of WhatsApp groups but they are just for organising stuff, they are not really chatty except for my siblings one. We live far away so we do send on kids pics etc, but that's not social media as such. I've never created a profile for myself in any form.

It seems to add so little to people's lives and take so much. All we ever hear about is people having a false hopes based on Instagram even though everyone knows it's fake, how stupid are people who believe this? Facebook from what I hear just complicates social politics, announcing break ups, unfriending etc. I can't see why anyone would add a layer of complications to their lives!!

lastminutewednesday · 01/08/2023 11:19

My best friend. I admire her in some ways. But she is also shit at replying to texts etc so we rarely see each other (she lives an hour away anyway) and we aren't au fait with each others lives really anymore.
I don't share much on my socials but you could get a general jist of what's going on. She has no idea, nor me her, and the friendship is drifting a bit from both sides as neither have time to make further effort I suppose. Which is sad. We get on just the same when we do see each other as we have done since we were 11. It's just few and far between.

Mygrandadwasmywingman · 01/08/2023 11:20

My parents-my mother has only just got to grips with texting so they can keep tabs on my kids

My dad is so bad at technology,he's only just got to grips with his VHS player and the tv remote

My mil-she has WiFi at home (for people who come over) and a smartphone but doesn't use about 99% of what it does-she can text but she writes like it's a letter

There is two photos oneline of her-both on my insta (posted with her permission) as its very locked down and only my friend's can see it

I have Facebook,insta,WhatsApp and mumsnet

Never use WhatsApp,fb and insta are locked down and I'm anonymous on here

SadieOlsen · 01/08/2023 11:23

Me. I don't have a smartmobile phone either. If someone searched for me online they would find nothing. It's taken years to achieve. I was online from 1997s and had my first computer in 1980.
I used to be contracted to "find" people and I was shocked how many people put everything out about themselves. One hour and I can find everything. Many people use the same passwords or versions of the same. I can find newspaper articles, credit record, court records, reddit account, bankruptcy, all social media, who they live with and everything about their families, children, careers and friends. Hacking into their email and social media would be very easy as would using their identity.

Their security, their privacy, their future employment prospects, security of their identity the safety of their children - they either don't know or don't care. Linktree makes it even easier, now.

Icedlatteplease · 01/08/2023 11:24

My mum and dad.

Unless you already know me you are very very unlikely to find my Facebook. I have no searchable online presence thanks to a stalkery ex

RattleRattle · 01/08/2023 11:27

This reply has been deleted

This user is a goady troll so we've removed their posts.

hahahahahahahahahah · 01/08/2023 11:27

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

MrsDanversGlidesAgain · 01/08/2023 11:28

XDownwiththissortofthingX · 01/08/2023 10:47

I can totally understand the no smartphone thing. I never owned a mobile prior to 2015, and even then I only gave in because work insisted. It's strictly a work device to me and gets switched off as soon as I finish for the day. I have all the internet access I need via PC, and I just feel a bit bemused at the number of people I see walking down the street glued to their phones, or couples sitting in a bar or restaurant ignoring each other but furiously tapping away at their smartphones. I can't imagine what they are so utterly in the thrall of that they'll risk walking under a bus because of it.

Sounds like me. I got a mobile in 2006 because I was temping and agency got fed up of leaving messages on the landline (the bloke's expression when he asked me 'what do you want it to do?' and I said 'um, make calls? 😅) I have an android phone for calls and texts, a LinkedIn profile that exists with no details, haven't used FB for about 4 years and Twitter for a year (check the local happenings but that's about it and def haven't posted). MN is my only SM presence.

And I'm very happy with all the above.

LondonQueen · 01/08/2023 11:30

Whilst I previously had quite a large online following, I'm now a mother and a teacher so I've got new accounts that are only for family and friends under an alias. It's a much simpler life.

Abouttimemum · 01/08/2023 11:31

My husband has no online presence and is never idling or faffing with his phone. I wish I could be more like him!

SummerWillow · 01/08/2023 11:38

I started at a new small workplace a while back and they have very active social media, usually featuring employees and what they have been up to. I had to ask not to be included in this which I think didn't go down well - I'm just not keen on being all over the internet. I have a profile on their website though as this wasn't optional - much too much publicity for my liking!!