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Would you leave a nearly 13yr old and 14yr old at home alone in the evening?

50 replies

DataColour · 26/07/2023 09:44

Just wondering what others would do. DH and I are thinking of going out to a friends this evening. We normally take turns. Never left them for more than about an hour in the evening before, although have left them for longer in the day time.
It'll be from about 7.30-11.30pm. Is it too late? DD is 13 next month and DS is 14.5. Both are pretty sensible. They are happy for us to go out, but feel anxious about it. Probably won't be able to enjoy the evening!!

OP posts:
OnTheBoardwalk · 26/07/2023 22:36

I agree it depends on how they get on together but it’s really how they respond to you

i was 14 when left with my older brother. Usually we bickered like cat and dog but we didn’t when left on our own. No need to play up

AvengedQuince · 26/07/2023 22:40

I'd call after 10pm night not evening. I would leave them as long as they are together but wouldn't leave the youngest alone past 10pm at only 12.

Parvolax · 26/07/2023 22:41

Yes

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Spudlover · 26/07/2023 22:44

They'll be absolutely fine. Mine loved it when we left them home alone, especially when they had the responsibility of putting a frozen pizza in the oven. They felt like grown ups!

clary · 26/07/2023 22:44

For sure, not an issue at all.

clary · 26/07/2023 22:45

Oh just seen it was tonight. Hope you had fun op!

Peanutbutterandmarmalade64 · 26/07/2023 22:49

You say they are both sensible, and definitely not too young IMO. If emergency plan and contacts are pre arranged go for it. You have to start somewhere, sometime. This is how DCs learn to be responsible adults, coping alone with a support system in place. You may not feel fully relaxed enough to enjoy this first time, but I bet it will go well and build confidence in you all moving forwards.

bert3400 · 26/07/2023 22:51

Absolutely

mast0650 · 26/07/2023 22:55

Yes. Absolutely. I know some 14 year olds who babysit (though personally my minimum age was 15). I might not go all that far initially and/or I would make sure they had another adult contact who was fairly nearby and definitely contactable. I think everyone I know would leave their kids at that age.

Sewingdufus · 26/07/2023 22:59

Yes, I would leave them as long as they were happy with the situation and knew how to contact you if they have a wobble.

Violinist64 · 26/07/2023 23:04

Of course. I was taking other people's babies out in prams when I was eleven and babysitting at thirteen.

HarrietofFire · 26/07/2023 23:04

Yes. They don't suddenly change personality just because you're not in the house. Enjoy your night out!

LadyGAgain · 26/07/2023 23:04

Yes!

BumpyaDaisyevna · 27/07/2023 03:39

Yes!

Mine are 14 and nearly 12. We leave them in the evening now though not till 1130 - more like 6-10pm if we go to cinema or out to eat.

We buy them a Tesco Chinese meal deal for two that they can microwave and a bottle of coke and they can buy a film on sky. They love it! 🤣

BumpyaDaisyevna · 27/07/2023 03:41

I guess there comes a point where you feel that it's odd to have a babysitter who is only a year or two older.

When we go out we do set up my parents as "remote babysitter". I check my mum's in and if there was any problems she would be there in 5 mins. You could do that with a friend if you've no parents around?

Commonhousewitch · 27/07/2023 04:24

I just started leaving my 13 year old for an evening. I was also concerned- more that i thought go to bed in an empty house is quite hard - but he had been pressing for it for ages and didn't really see the babysitter anyway!

Hollyppp · 27/07/2023 04:52

I was babysitting at that age! By 16 I was looking after babies under 1 for the evening!!

Ragwort · 27/07/2023 04:56

Yes .. obviously too late now but surely it would have been better to build up to this by leaving them for shorter periods first?

DataColour · 27/07/2023 10:07

So they were fine last night!

Before we left, we helped them choose a film (they went for Crazy Rich Asians - good choice!) and they were washed and in their PJs.
They were asleep when we came back at 11.30pm although woke up briefly when we checked on them! They had done hours of sport yesterday so they were both tired and went to bed at usual time they said! I did worry about them a bit during the night, and it won't be a regular thing, but good to know that it'll be OK.

OP posts:
DinnaeFashYersel · 27/07/2023 10:10

Absolutely and I do

Doone21 · 27/07/2023 14:23

If they're anxious it's only cos they're not used to it but they got to start somewhere so their anxiety shouldn't put you off. They'll get more confident from being able to cope.

Andanotherone01 · 27/07/2023 14:31

Is this for real?

Oblomov23 · 27/07/2023 15:04

Of course. Why ever not?

Oblomov23 · 27/07/2023 15:05

Sorry, just seen update. Good!

ifonly4 · 27/07/2023 15:09

If you trust them, yes. I'd lock them in though (leaving a spare key) and obviously let them know where you're going in case you don't hear your mobile. Worst case scenario, they'll probably go to bed a bit later and eat the biscuits!

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