I had to put my young cat to sleep yesterday

[Catclown]

I’m devastated. He had only just turned 2 the week before. He started having seizures last week and they were coming nearly every hour on the day before. It was heartbreaking to see and medication didn’t stop them.

I feel so guilty even though I know it was the right thing to do for him. I can’t stop thinking about him, I can hear his meow. We have another cat and dog and I feel awful that they don’t understand where he has gone.

my kids and husband are so upset, it’s so hard. I don’t know why I posting this but I’m just lay here and keep getting overwhelming waves of sadness and I’m just crying. Please tell me this gets easier.

Thats so terrible for you, I'm so sorry, OP.
Please don't feel guilty, you acted for the best for him, it sounds there was nothing else that could be done.
And it sounds like he was a much loved family member and had a happy life with you.
It does get easier with time , I often think of our DCats with much affection now, although I still miss them.

Thank you for your reply, I just feel like I should have been able to do more, I don’t know what but something.

I miss him so much and he was sooo young, It’s so unfair, he was such a happy lively little cat. He had so much life to live.

I’m sorry about your lost cats, it’s nice that you can look back with affection, they leave a permanent mark on your heart don’t they

I am so, so sorry, OP, that's absolutely horrible.

Have you ever looked at The Cat Site? There are many, many people there who absolutely get it, and sections for people who are grieving the loss of their cat. It's a very supportive place.

Thank you, I have never heard of that site but I will have a look, thank you. It just feels so raw. I had to take him to the vets and I stayed with him. I just felt so cruel.

You're very welcome, @Catclown , I hope you find some comfort there. I felt dreadful for years about my boy I had to get put to sleep when he was eight - untreatable cancer - it would have been even worse had he been as young as your darling boy.

You weren't cruel, you were easing his burden and helping him out of his suffering. It is so hard to witness/go through 💐You did the right thing.

I lost both my cats within a month earlier this year so completely understand the pain you're going through. It is so very hard. Try to focus on the joy he brought you and your family. I've had a bracelet made that contains the fur of both my kitties that I wear and never take off. That helps me feel closer to them. Hugs to you 🤗

You were not cruel it was the right thing to do but so upsetting, especially with a young cat when it’s out of the blue like that.

I still remember my childhood cat who died more than 30 years ago and I tell my kids about things she used to do. We have two cats now and I’m going to be devastated when we lose them, they are part of our family.

I'm so sorry for your loss, that's awful. Did the vet offer a postmortem? A lot of illnesses can cause seizures in young cats including FIP and FIV. With you having another cat it may be worth knowing, especially if they are outdoor cats.

Thank you for all your kind messages. He wasn’t sick or had an upset tummy so she said it was unlikely to be an infection or toxin. She kept mentioning her time at vet school and brain tumour and she thought it was that with the symptoms he was having. They didn’t mention post-mortem or anything though.

he seemed like he was forgetting things as well, like wondering round the rooms as if everything was new and he hadn’t lived here his whole life. He forgot he had treats at bedtime. He had a big drink of water and then walked in circles round the room and go back to the water as if he had forgotten he had just had a drink.

I just wish it was different. Night times feel raw and painful right now, but at least he isn’t in pain or distress. I have to keep telling myself if was the right thing. I think he knew he was loved and I suppose that is all I can hope for.

@Catsmere thank you for recommending that site, I have had a quick look round but I think it will be helpful over the coming weeks.

thank you everyone xx

You could not have done more and you took him to the vet as an act of I dead to ease his suffering.

A short life but the most import thing to hold on was that he was loved by you and your family and knew it.

Thank you, I took him to the vets 3 times over 4 days, even the emergency vet at 1am. It must have been so stressful for him, not knowing what was going on. 😢

Hi @Catclown so sorry about your cat xx i totally understand how you're feeling, our cat passed away a couple of months ago. A very painful time but i do feel she is in a better place now and not suffering anymore. It is still very raw for you all, time is a healer xx ❤

Instead of ruminating about his lost life and your devastation at not having been able to cure him of whatever caused his seizures, can you try to focus on the fact that he had a happy life and you did absolutely everything you could to help him.

And his last conscious thought will have been the realization that his suffering was easing, and he was at peace. Please take comfort from this thought 🐾

I’m so sorry. You did the right thing for your baby. It sounds like he was very loved and that is the most important thing x

Thank you everyone, you really helped me last night. Who knew strangers on the internet could help so much.

@Tulpenkavalier thanks I will try and think of it in that way, I know it was the right thing and he is not suffering any more.

@Summer2424 im sorry you lost your cat recently, I hope the pain is getting easier for you now

@ThePoint678 and @Jongleterre he was so loved and a real character, at least we got to have him with us for his short life, at least we can cherish the memories.

I am trying to just think of good things about him and not his suffering, I got in the car earlier and I had left his collar in there 😢 sometimes it just gets me but I guess it will take time.

It does get easier. Give yourself time to love his place in your memories.
But remember your cat and dog are grieving as well.

@OhcantthInkofaname i know, my other cat is not an outdoorsy cat but he keeps going out for long periods, even in the rain today, I think he was looking for his cat brother 😢 they just don’t understand do they.

Am so sorry for your loss.

Firstly, please just try to hold on to the fact that you did everything for him. You sought treatment and then, sadly, had to make the decision. Although hard, that decision you took is the kindest and most loving act you could give. It hurts you, but it means that he isn’t suffering.

Secondly, I and others, completely understand that feeling of “please reassure me it gets better”. When you lose a beloved pet, it can feel so painful that you just can’t imagine ever feeling ok about it. All I can say is - it WILL get better. But it will get better in your own time, everyone has their own timeframe to when that is.

Don’t beat yourself up with time limits etc. Let yourself feel sad when you need to, let yourself smile when you think of him fondly.

“Give yourself time”, for me, is one of the most maddening phrases. You want to shout at someone who utters it when it’s raw for you. Yet, when you’ve gone through your personal allowance of time, you realise it’s true.

Not sure if you’re aware, but there is a board on here called The Litter Tray. You may want to post a thread in there for further support, etc. They are a lovely bunch and you can take your time to post as and when you feel you need to.

Thank you for your kind words @Furries i will have a look at the board.

i hope I can get through my personal allowance of time in good time and I can smile about him without sobbing. I just miss him. Time is a great healer though, I know.