DS PTSD after bullying - terrible dreams every night

[Bretzet]

DS (14) was bullied very badly last year. We've pulled him out but have only recently learned how bad it was. He suffers with anxiety anyway but diagnosed with PTSD and is now on fluoxetine and waiting to start EMDR.

He wakes every. single. night crying and terrified. Worries now about going to bed. Psychiatrist says there's nothing they can give him for the dreams and that the EMDR will be his best bet. It doesn't start for a while due to holidays etc.

Is there anything anyone can suggest that might help ease his nighttime burden a bit until then? He has fidget toys, sensory lights, audio books to listen to when we wakes up, weighted blanket for the night, he can watch videos on his phone (tends to be the most effective). I feel so sorry for him - he dreads nights now...

Herbal sleeping tablets maybe? With valerian in them. They might help relax him. Poor lad.

Tetris - we bought a small handheld version. There is some evidence, albeit weak, of it helping with PTSD, especially in combination with EMDR. It seemed to help.

Bring him in with you or DH if your son is willing? Just having another person beside him may help. I do get that he’s 14 but this sounds so tough. Or (obviously with much consideration) a pet? My parents got me my cat when I was being bullied and she helped so much - furry presence on the end of the bed.

Thank you all. These are great suggestions. Yes we have a bed set up for him to come into if he needs it. I might suggest he is in with us to start with and yes to valerian, thanks @Fluffycloudsblusky . Will try.

I like the idea of Tetris and this is a good way to distract and get him to focus on something else for a while. I like this. @Nearlyneverready could I ask which handheld version you bought?

It's funny - we have a cat and despite me thinking that she really is the most rubbish and selfish therapy cat ever she does seem to bring much comfort (when she deems it appropriate). @Outwiththenorm I'm sorry you went through a rough time too.

The Tetris that I bought was from BM stores, but I can’t see it on their website now. I googled “Tetris key ring” and came up with a lot of identical products though, but they are a bit more that I paid. https://www.wickeduncle.co.uk/childrens-presents/tetris---handheld-game is the same one. It’s very basic, but seemed to do the trick. It was kept in DS’s pocket for a long time.

I’m so sorry your DS is going through this. It is great that you have been able to remove him from the situation - that sends a strong message to him. It is awful that it has happened to him, but it will mean a lot to him to know that you are there to support him in any way possible.

I don't know if it's due to peri, but I sometimes wake up in a panic and can't get back to sleep. Taking anti anxiety meds before bed brakes the cycle. I doubt he could take those meds at 14, but trying some Bach remedies or something when he wakes up might be a good distraction. I'm quite a beliver in if you want it to help, placebo effect helps too. A little routine like the tetras too just not too long as it might keep him awake. I do say to myself "worry about it in the morning" that sometimes works.
Poor kid, I hope the edrm works

Since he's already on medication, check with his psychiatrist before trying anything else even if it is herbal. Sometimes herbal remedies can have unexpected interactions with prescribed medications.

There's something called nightmare rescripting that is sometimes suggested for trauma. It essentially amounts to visualising the nightmares regularly when awake but changing the "script" so that they end differently or they're in black and whit (i.e. putting you in control of the dream).

There are various research papers on it but I was trying to find a more readable link:

https://psychcentral.com/blog/a-brief-guide-to-imagery-rehearsal-therapy-irt-for-nightmare-disorders-for-clinicians-and-patients#what-to-expect

If that's too much, I would just focus on the soothing strategies.

When he starts EMDR, I would expect them to build a safe/comforting mental place/image with him. That's something he could start now and take himself there when he wakes up from nightmares. It's a way to make you feel safe again when very distressed.

Thanks all so much for your thoughts and suggestions and yes good point, I will check interactions with fluoxetine. I'm hoping that the EMDR makes a difference. He's trying so hard to move forward and be positive in the daytime and this just throws him right back into it.

I'm off to buy the mini tetris.

Could he go on Amitriptyline instead of fluoxetine? That helps with sleep and nightmares in my experience.

I just googled and found this "The SSRI fluoxetine may increase your odds of remembering your dreams or nightmares. It also can increase how vivid your dreams are."

I found Amitriptyline stopped me remembering dreams and it relaxed me after dh died

I think until it settled down I’d let him bed share with me or DH , and the other one sleep in his bed.

agree with the idea that mediation may be contributing to his sleep issues. It’s really hard when your mental health is poor to consider what’s mental health related/what’s a side effect.