Ridiculous but can you help me with what to do day to day

[dahliaaa]

I've always worked full time apart from maternity leave but I'm going through some kind of breakdown and I've got a lot of time at home and I don't really know what to do.
I know that sounds completely ridiculous but I'm just not used to having that time.
I'm getting medical help but I also need to 'schedule' my days to help with the depression and anxiety. I don't have any motivation at all so need to write a plan for each day.
Life has always been a whirlwind of work / kids activities / running from one thing to the next. (They are grown up now.)
I just wondered what people do ...
I've always been terrible at housework - doing it because it needs doing but never seeing it as something I enjoy.
Needs to be quite basic because I'm struggling at the moment but would be good to see some examples of how people fill their days.

That’s a good call. I saw a film called ‘my octopus teacher’ and I think the wild swimming saved him.

That's such a horrendously long and overwhelming list! I am lucky to not suffer with mental health problems but if I felt I had to do this much every day I would not be able to cope!

Surely it's best to aim for one or two things a day, or just getting up, washed and dressed if things are really bad.

My friend fostered a dog to force herself out the house. I also think human connection helps. Could you volunteer once a week? Schedule time to sleep. Walk with a podcast on. Do a yoga class? Sleep(nap)

I'm doing better with the regular getting up/making the bed and bed time plus meal times so will now try to schedule some other easy things around those.
(Initially getting downstairs by 3pm was a major achievement.)

Do a free course on Coursera or EdX. They have some nice ones on art.

Thank you.

I will look at the courses. Thank you

This is excellent. I love looking at examples of routines and this is a really good one. Thanks for posting. Lots of good ideas in the comments.

Op, I hope you’re feeling better soon. Motivation is so important, natural or forcing ourselves 😀. If I need motivation, I’ll watch one of those motivational videos that all over YouTube, one that appeals to what sounds motivating that day, like decluttering or cleaning or routines.

I agree that getting straight up and dressed early, is important, after exercising maybe, and fresh air and sun, getting out of the house are musts and I’d add uplifting music, I like classical and baroque, sometimes just fun upbeat country songs, help tremendously. And very important, connections with friends, family, and loved ones. Reach out, write or send texts, emails, meet up, or have someone over. Do things like museum visits or a fun autumn outing with people. Carry on!

Making the bed and planning meals, regular routine of times for meals etc. and goals. Taking a course as suggested is great. Set goals, and a purpose. Meditation and spiritual exploration might help too.

Swimming
Aqua aerobics
Gym
Library
Meeting friends/family
Arts and crafts

I've been a sahm for years and we had more children in COVID lockdown, and I became quite reclusive.

I didn't realise how much it had affected me, until I realised I lived in loungewear, and would spend over a week not leaving the house.

Getting out is key. But someone telling me "go for a walk" would have been utterly useless, as I just wouldn't have the motivation, or indeed enjoy an aimless amble to nowhere and back.

I started picking pointless things to do. But that actually had a "point" to them. So no pressure to get something done, just a task. Like, today, I will find somewhere that sells fresh eggs at the side of the road, and buy a box. Today, I will go to two charity shops and pick something from each. Today, I will sort all the old kids clothes. Tomorrow I will list them on eBay. Today I will buy a book of stamps from a village post office I haven't been too.

I was so reclusive,.I was making myself depressed. This time last year, I felt like I'd lost all my social skills, and felt quite overwhelmed at the thought of interacting with people. I used to be able to sell ice to the Eskimos, and suddenly I couldn't even do small talk.

I took baby steps, just getting back out there with my silly tasks, and this month I started a little part time role in a charity. That we don't need me to do (DH high earner) but it's completely pulled me back from the abyss. I keep thinking god, I should have done this sooner, but frankly, this time last year I'd have stuttered through the interview or not even turned up.

It doesn't matter what you do. Just do something. Tomorrow, go and drive to a farm shop you've never visited, and buy some lemon curd. Just because.

That long list is far too much to cope with. My doctor said to do one or two things a day so I felt I had achieved something.

Yesterday I read half a book that I had been meaning to get round to.

The day before I took some clothes to be altered.

On Monday I cleaned and sorted a small shelf in the bathroom.

At the weekend I sorted through my wardrobe (was very tired the next day though).

These are all things that add up, I can see the difference and I don't beat myself up about not doing them 100% (eg not reading the whole book in one day).

Small steps op.