Opinions please

[topoftheworld1]

I'm posting because I'd like some neutral opinions on whether I'm over reacting please. My 11 year old son is with his dad this weekend (we're divorced). My son has just video called me and shown me that his nan (ex husband's mum) has bleached his hair. This has never been mentioned to me and had no idea this was going to happen? Am I wrong in thinking this is something which should have at least been discussed with me?

I haven't said anything to ex as yet because I feel he's trying to get a rise out of me. He likes to know he's 'got' to me and I normally don't give him the satisfaction so am super happy smiley when he's around because I know it bothers him when I'm happy. Half of me thinks he knows it will piss me off and he wants an argument so don't give him the satisfaction. However the other half of me says it's out of order that he didn't even discuss it first? As I said, I don't know if I'm over reacting so am wondering how others would feel. Thanks in advance.

Did your son want it done and has she made a good job of it? If so-I think I'd probably grit my teeth and let it go. Particularly if you think they did it to get a ride out of you. Don't give them the satisfaction and DON'T let your son think he's a playing piece in a game of tit for tat. Be pleased and complimentary to him and in front of him.

Thanks, I appreciate the advice. Yes I'm sure my son wanted it done.

I don't think I would have been quite so pissed off had it been discussed with me. Just shows no respect at all.

But I suppose the damage is done now so part of me doesn't want him to get the satisfaction he's after. What he wants is for me to say something about it....then the floodgates will open and he tells me everything that's ever pissed him off.

it is done and can't be undone, let it go, and don't give anyone the satisfaction of a response. Just sile happily and compliment your son on his new look.